Tuesday, March 27, 2007

No Doubt... It's Idols!

Scroll down for the Idols, but first, here's the update on Deuce Madness... quite simply, if Georgetown defeats Ohio State to make it to the finals, David Mark Osborne wins the 2007 Deuce Madness outright. If Ohio State emerges victorious, Drew Morris and DMO will tie, leading to a Finals Tiebreak.

Final scores released on Monday.
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It's Dave's Random Bracket Sweet Sixteen!
The scores so far:
The Mikey Nipp Region
(1) Strong Bad takes out (8) Meredith Quintana 3-0... (5) Wendy Garner over (4) The Shawshank Redemption 3-1... (11) The Mackey Clan out-tosses (14) Erin Formerly-Known-As-Coates 3-1... (15) Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story continues its Cinderella run over (7) Kelly Clarkson 3-1

The iPod Region
(9) Ashley Judd ends (16) Hannah Pruitt's run 3-1... (4) Scott Latta takes out (5) Ashley Spell 3-2... (3) Hard Rain feat. Christian Slater defeats (6) The Empire Strikes Back 3-1... (10) Factor 7 outplays (2) The Rock 3-2

The Paula Maddox Region
(8) Christy Parvin over (16) Nelly Furtado's "Say It Right" 3-1... (4) Kellie Pickler sweeps (12) John Cena in The Marine 3-0... (14) Sarah McLachlan outsings (6) Hootie & the Blowfish 3-2... (10) James & Jessica Hawbaker defeats (2) O'Carr's Cheesecake 3-2

The Kids Hot Chocolate Region
(1) OutKast's "Hey Ya" over (8) The Geico Caveman 3-1... (13) Fergie's "Fergalicious" takes out (5) NYC Jenni... (6) Lost outcuts (14) HBO's "Autopsy"... (2) Tyler Campbell knocks out (7) Lily Allen's "Alright, Still" 3-2

Our Sweet Sixteen is Set!
In the Mikey Nipp Region:
(1) Strong Bad will take on (5) Wendy Garner, while (11) The Mackey Clan goes up against (15) Dodgeball, a True Underdog Story

In the iPod Region:
(9) Ashley Judd goes up against (5) Scott Latta, then (3) Hard Rain starring Christian Slater takes on (10) Factor 7

The Paula Maddox Region
In a battle of the blondes, (8) Christy Parvin matches up against (4) Kellie Pickler, while (14) Sarah McLachlan will face off against both (10) James and Jessica Hawbaker

The Troy State Region
It's like Dave's Idol when (1) OutKast's "Hey Ya" sings against (13) Fergie's "Fergalicious", and finally, (6) Lost will take on (2) Tyler Campbell

Who will make the Dave's Random Bracket Elite Eight? Tune in Thursday!
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Now, we get to American Idol...

Ah, the guest judge is Gwen Stefani... someone I can really, really be excited about seeing... let's face it--Gwen is hot. She just is. And her music is... well, hot too. No Doubt was a great group, with Tragic Kingdom being a great album, but I'm really liking Gwen's solo stuff too... "Hollaback Girl" is just fun and addicting, while her new stuff, including "Sweet Escape" is catchy. Okay, enough for the Gwen sales pitch...

Kiki is up first, and she'll be singing Donna Summer's immortal "Last Dance", a disco song I just love.

FYI... its 745 in the morning, and I was about to re-start American Idol before I go to work, and ended up spending 10 minutes watching Vince McMahon and Donald Trump on Fox & Friends, promoting the "Hair Match" on Wrestlemania 23 this weekend. Just thought I'd mention it.

To me, this totally feels like a song LaKisha should be singing... let's hope it works. Let's forget the fact she's wearing a Hawaiian Komono and ho boots. Randy liked the "uptempo joint". I like how Randy has added "joint" to "dawg" and "yo" to his vocabulary. Paula and Simon both liked it too.

And I just saw the new trailer for Spiderman 3. I'm as giddy as Michael Jackson watching a boys choir.

Up next is Chris Sligh. He's taking on "Every Little Thing She Does is Magic" by The Police, very daring. You know that car commercial where the dork is inside talking to the chick pumping gas... "would you like to come in for a smoothie?... YOU'RE SO HOT!!!". I would totally be that dorky in Gwen Stefani's presence. And I don't feel bad saying that--I think Steph would be a little weak around Colin Firth or Bradley Whitford.

And Chris is ahead of the band, just like last week. He's totally slipped into the middle-of-the-pack with C-Rich and Phil Stacey. Randy and Paula agree. Simon thought it was a mess.

Hey, its Gina Glocksen! G-Rock is singing The Pretenders "I'll Stand By You", a song-tempo change for her. If her skirt were any shorter, it'd be a belt. Not that I'm complaining... um... er, I mean, not that I'm condoning it. Bad Gina! She does look the best I've seen her, though.

And I thought the song was great. Randy agreed. I think Paula has a cauliflower on her ring. She liked the song too. Simon said "your best performance... the difference in a few weeks ago and tonight is like chalk and cheese" Go G-Rock! Go G-Rock!

Steph has already seen the show, and I asked her about Punjab as we lay in bed... she laughed, groaned and said "you'll have to see it". So, I'm bracing myself for a train wreck of a Howard Dean proportions...

He's singing "Bathwater" by No Doubt, which prompts Gwen to say "I think he was nervous because he forget some of the words"... no Gwen, he forgot some of the words because HE FREAKIN' SUCKS. Though she does add "...he chose it, so good luck for him" as she laughs slyly.

Ho..

...lee...

...crap...

All his hair is pulled up into a mohawk. His hair is in a mohawk. No seriously, all that hair is pulled into a mohawk. And the song is AWFUL... That might have been the worst experience of my life since I heard "Ladies and gentlemen, Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi" for the first time.

Randy says "I'm speechless...". Paula basically told him to grow a pair and sing. From Paula, that's pretty low. And Simon adds "I don't think it matters anymore what we say... you are in your own universe. Good luck."

And now I'm going to go overdose on Tums.

Haley is taking on "True Colors" by Cyndi Lauper... Gwen is cracking me up, because as Haley is practicing, Gwen's got this look on her face that say "what the...?". Hilarious.

At least she's got on more of a party dress and not a ho-wrap like last week. Too bad she's still awful. As much as I've heard the crowd say Antonella will wind up in Playboy, it wouldn't shock me if Haley did it after she got booted from this show in a week or so.

Randy and Paula... neither liked it. And its never good when Simon starts saying "How do you think you did?" because he wants to respond "it doesn't matter what you think, that was terrible".

Phil Stacey is in this hizzy... you know, I actually have grown to like Phil Stacey... I don't know if I'd buy his CD, but he's a likable guy. He's a Christ-follower, so that makes me kinda like the guy by default. Wow, he's taking on The Police's "I'm a Scary Stalker", also called "Every Breath You Take".

And its actually pretty good.

Randy liked it... Paula liked it... Simon thought it was really good. Phil and his wife are the kind of people Steph and I would invite to our Sunday Sch... er, Life Connection class.

Mindy Doo is doing some Donna Summer, "Heaven Knows", a song I'm not familiar with, though with Mindy Doo, does it even matter? Except for the fact her dress looked lke a 1987 JC Penny catalog threw up, she's fantastic.

My favorite part is watching her cute, humble face when the judges gush on her. Wow this chick has some pipes. And.... there it is from Randy. And... from Paula. Simon says "Vocally outstanding, but not the best performance... but hate the outfit."

No breakfast better than reheated, three day old sesame chicken from Happy china. Makes me feel like I'm in college again.

Beatbox Blake is attempting The Cure's "Love Song", a tough song to pull off. Gwen cautions him on not doing the beatbox in the wrong place, and he actually does it without the beatbox. Impressive.

Randy just kinda-liked it. Paula has all sorts of sunshine for Blake. I think she just slipped him her room key. Simon says "best guy in the competition... be careful not to fall into the Daughtry mold where you're always doing your own thing..." Okay, so McPhee, Pickles and Taylor Hicks combined have sold about 50 to 75% of what Daughtry has sold... I think Blake will be just fine if thats the case.

Jordin is "Hey Baby" by No Doubt. I'm actually surprised. She's sporting the Janet Jackson hula-hoop sized earrings, and she's got a less-skanky Britney school girl outfit on. Interesting. I really like Jordin, but I'm not sure I like the song.

Randy says it was risky, but it was good. Paula says "hip", "adorable" and "give my room key to Blake". Simon says she's much improved.

And closing the show tonight is C-Rich, who is singing "Don't Speak".

What Gwen says: "I've seen Chris on the show before, and I know he likes to do this 'vocal Olympics' sometimes, and I don't think she song really needs that..."

What Gwen meant: "Oh crap, he's going to totally screw this up, and I'm not happy about it."

This is totally a chick song... as in, its weird when guys sing it. Like now. And I think he borrowed Jordin's schoolgirl tie she was going to wear.

Randy liked the twist on it... Paula liked it. Simon liked the song much better, but not crazy about the vocals. I personally thought it was terrible.

Alright, my top ten for tonight: 1) Gina... 2) LaKisha... 3) Mindy Doo... 4) Phil... 5) Jordin... 6) Blake... 7) Chris Sligh... 8) Chris Rich... 67) Haley... 154) Sanjaya

And my overall top three: Gina, Mindy Doo and Blake

Friday, March 23, 2007

Madness Random Idol

Three things in this posting... Deuce Madness Update, a Dave's Random Bracket Update, and a Idol conversation...

Apologies for not updating like I should... unfortunately, silly little things like life, work, marriage, haircuts, oil changes, job transition and spending time with Steph get in the way of updating on my blog... I'm sure you understand =)

First, the Madness. Well, its pretty much over for me--the only thing I have to work towards is trying to at least tie Steph,though I'll have to be nearly perfect for the rest of the tourney. I'm sad now.

As of 1207pm, Saturday (before the Elite Eight games tip off), here are the updated standings, with name, points and in ( ) is the number of final four team left on their bracket:
1. David Mark Osborne, 490 (4)
2-tie. Mark Gainey, 480 (3)
2-tie. Drew Morris, 480 (4)
4. Scott Latta, 445 (3)
5-tie. The Idol, 440 (4)
5-tie. The Powell, 440 (4)
5-tie. The Wife, 440 (4)
8. Barnie, 435 (4)
9-tie. Mikey, 430 (4)
9-tie. Brad Latta, 430 (4)
9-tie. Hawbaker, 430 (3)
9-tie. TomJ, 430 (3)
13-tie. Matta Latta, 420 (4)
13-tie. Yours Truly, 420 (2)
15. Tyler Campbell, 415 (3)
16. Tebershaw, 410 (3)
17-tie. JTay, 390 (3)
17-tie. Sarah, 390 (3)
19. Garrett Cheney, 365 (3)
Dead Last. Trey Cartledge, 340 (2)

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A Few Things I Learned from Idol This Past Week, in no random order
...it's hard to hear any song being sung when there are polecats wrestling, as there were underneath Haley's gold bandanna shirt she wore
...Blake Lewis, though he won't win, is going to be mildly successful after this show is over
...Crying girl over and over? Inappropriate. The Kinks crying, over Punjab butchering thier song? Completely appropriate, and even understandable
...My fascination with Chris Sligh is sadly slipping away, as his performances is just not that memorable right now
...Paula says less by saying more than anyone else I know... okay, except for Pelosi. And Algore. And Alec Baldwin. And Rosie O'Donnell. And...
...I keep waiting for one of the cast members to finally say about one of the guest judges, "She's coming? Crap... I hate her music", like I'm sure some of them were quietly saying about Diana Ross.
...A Fergie themed night would be out of control.
...Though it's starting to get a little more competitive, this is Mindy Doo's competition to lose
...When Paula starts out any comments with "You look great" or "You had a lot of fun up there", that means "You sucked, but I just don't want to say it"
...Jordin Sparks rocks my face off.
...I've got the Hots For Glock.
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Dave's Random Bracket Update

Final first round action:
(1) Strong Bad defeated (16) The Samson Tigers 3-2, and (8) Meredith Quintana takes out (9) The Red Hot Chili Peppers 3-0

(5) Wendy Garner takes out (12) The Purple Onion 3-1, while (4) The Shawshank Redemption defeats (13) Sister Act 2's "Joyful Joyful" 3-2.
In a huge upset, play-in winner (16) Hannah Pruitt defeats (1) Rush Limbaugh 3-1, and hot (9) Ashley Judd defeats (8) The Amazing Race All Stars 3-1.
(5) Ashley Spell defeats (12) Dale's Southern Grill 3-2 and then (4) Scott Latta sweeps (13) Ginny Weasley 3-0...

So that means... Dave's Random Bracket 2nd Round Commences!

Here's what is looks like:

THE MIKEY NIPP REGION
The Venti Caramal Macchiato Subregional
(1) Strong Bad vs (8) Meredith Quintana
(5) Wendy Garner vs (4) The Shawshank Redemption

The Tall Vanilla Bean Frappuccino Subregional
(11) The Mackey Clan vs (14) The Erin Formerly Known as Coates
(7) Kelly Clarkson vs (15) Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story

THE iPOD REGION
The Double Tall Cafe Mocha Subregional
(16) Hannah Pruitt vs (9) Ashley Judd
(5) Ashley Spell vs (4) Scott Latta

The Doppio Espresso Subregional
(6) The Empire Strikes Back vs (3) Hard Rain starring Christian Slater
(10) Factor 7 vs (2) The Rock

THE PAULA MADDOX REGION
The Iced Tall Cafe Americano Subregional
(16) Nelly Furtado's "Say It Right" vs (8) Christy Parvin
(12) John Cena in "The Marine" vs (4) Kellie Pickler

The Grande Soy Chai Subregional
(6) Hootie & the Blowfish vs (14) Sarah McLachlan
(10) James & Jessica Hawbaker vs (2) O'Carrs Cheesecake

THE TROY STATE REGION
The Kids Hot Chocolate Subregional
(1) Outkast's "Hey Ya" Video vs (8) The Geico Caveman
(5) NYC Jenni vs (13) Fergie's "Fergalicious"

The Grande Cinnamon Dolce Subregional
(6) Lost vs (14) HBO's Autopsy
(7) Lily Allen's "Alright, Still" vs (2) Tyler Campbell

Coming This Week:
The Sweet Sixteen, and by next weekend, we'll have an Elite Eight & a Final Four! Who Will be hoisting the Steph Leann Random Bracket Trophy?

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

A New Cup of Coffee...

So, I got a job assignment... I'm headed to the Cabaha Heights Starbucks. For those of you out of state, I'm currently ASM at the Starbucks on Hwy 280, one of the busiest in the city... and I'm going to a store that doesn't make quite as much, but is growing fast... and I'm excited about it.

I mean, I would stay at 280 if I could... but I know I'm not going to get that store (as manager) no matter what. Eventually, I would have to leave... and it might as well be now. I'll miss my people there, many of which I hired, notably Rocky & Nall Wall, two great shifts and future managers, and two big wrestling fan... Theresa, who is getting married in June, and I think is going to be an awesome wife and awesome whatever she's going to do with her life... Lauri, who I've known a long while and makes me laugh... and Amanda, whom I'm just getting to know, and can see remnants of myself and Steph in her and her hubby's Tim's three month old marriage.

I start Monday.
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This keyboard is crap. It really is. I have to keep going back and correcting my sentences, cause it keeps missing letters when I type, and I type fast (up to 75 wpm in high school--we used real typewriters... no, I'm not kidding). To show you how bad it is, I'll type this entire paragraph over with no corrections:

This keyoard s cra. It rally is. Ihave to keep going back and correcig my sentences, cause it kees missing letters wen I type, and I type fast (up to 75 wpm in high school--we used realy typewriter... no I'm not kidding).

See, told ya.
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I love how President Clinton, in 1992, fired 93--NINETY THREE--district attorneys, all at the same time, surely disrupting at least some investigations going on, within two weeks of taking office... the wacko left is going nuts over Atty General Gonzeles firing 8 D.A.s, after almost two years of studies and recommendations, including some D.A.s that were retiring anyway in a few months--a power not only given to President Clinton, but also Dubya--because it might "interrupt some important investigations"... none of which, unfortunately, including Sandy Burgler and Representative William Jefferson, Democrat Louisiana.
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Oh, and I also love Rosie O'Donnell, defending KSM, who admitted to a ton of terrorist plannings, not the least of which is the 9/11 attacks, and the 93 WTC bombing. She's just precious. I mean, to call this guy a terrorist is to take away his "humanity". Can't do that.

And on "The View", she went on this tirade about the war and the military and so on, all of which I could actually refute easily. And I'm stupid.
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Continued 1st Round Action in Dave's Random Bracket!

The Paula Maddox Region
Iced Tall Cafe American Subregional
(16) Nelly Furtado's "Say It Right" shocks the top seeded (1) Sports Guy by a score of 3-1. Nelly will take on (8) Christy Parvin, who swept (9) Florida Gators, National Champions, 3-0.

We'll also see a John Cena/Kellie Pickler second round match, as we have our first 5/12 upset--(12) John Cena in "The Marine" blanks (5) Nina Simone's "Feelin' Good", while (4) Kellie Pickler out sings (13) The Drudge Report 3-2.

The Grande Soy Chai Subregional
In other first round action, (6) Hootie & the Blowfish out sing (11) Kate Winslet (whom I was actually rooting for--again, I need help) 3-2, and will take on (14) Sarah McLachlan, who beat (3) Ryan Sherman 3-0. At least he got 12.

(10) James & Jessica Hawbaker double-team (7) Nikki Brown 3-1, and will face (2) O'Carrs Cheesecake, which took out (15) Attactix 3-1.

The Troy State Region
Kids Hot Chocolate Subregional
(1) Outkast says "See Ya" to (16) Haley Heckman 3-1, and (8) The Geico Caveman outthunk (9)Sandra Oh 3-1. Outkast vs The Geico Caveman in the 2nd Round.

We'll see (5) NYC Jenni take on (13) Fergie's "Fergalicious" in the next round, in a battle sure to be D to the E to the L-I-C-I-O-U-S. Jenni wiped out (12) Gil Grissom 3-1, and Fergie took out (4) Tommy McLeod 3-1.

Coming later on, the final matches of the first round, including the Venti Caramal Macchiato Subregional:
(1) Strong Bad vs (16) The Samson Tigers
(8) Meredith Quintana vs (9) The Red Hot Chili Peppers "Snow"
(5) Wendy Garner vs (12) The Purple Onion
(4) The Shawshank Redemption vs (13) Sister Act 2's "Joyful Joyful"

And the Double Tall Cafe Mocha Subregional:
(1) Rush Limbaugh vs (16) Hannah Pruitt
(8) The Amazing Race All Stars vs (9) Ashley Judd
(5) Ashley Spell vs (12) Dale's Southern Grill
(4) Scott Latta vs (13) Ginny Weasley

Oh yeah, we'll have some Idol chatter as well...

Sunday, March 18, 2007

Dave's Random Bracket... First Round Action

Scroll down for Deuce Madness 07 results... check here Tuesday night for more Dave's Random Bracket action

Play In Game
Hannah Pruitt defeats Lisa Loeb & Nine Stories' "Stay" by a total of 3 to 2! 16th seeded Hannah goes on to the Double Tall Cafe Mocha Subregional (in the iPod Region) to take on top seeded Rush Limbaugh.

The Doppio Espresso Subregional
(6) The Empire Strikes Back def. (11) Ultimate Sue Storm 3-1

(3) Hard Rain with Christian Slater def. (14) ESPN's SportsCenter 3-2

(10) Factor 7 def. (7) Katharine McPhee 3-2

(2) The Rock def. (15) Sweet Potato Casserole 3-0

Next Round:

(6) The Empire Strikes Back vs. (3) Hard Rain, starring Christian Slater

(10) Factor 7 vs. (2) The Rock

Tall Vanilla Bean Frappuccino Subregional

(11) The Mackey Clan def. (6) Rick & Bubba 3-2

In a major upset, (14) Erin Formerly-Known-As-Coates shocks (3) Ann Coulter 3-1

(7) Kelly Clarkson takes out (10) Survivor 3-1

In a bigger upset, (15) Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story defeats (2) The Big Wookiee Chris Fulaytar 3-2

Next Round:

(11) The Mackey Clan takes on (14) Erin Formerly-Known-As-Coates

(7) Kelly Clarkson takes on (15) Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story

TUESDAY NIGHT'S MATCHUPS:

The Iced Tall Cafe American Subregional

(1) The Sports Guy vs (16) Nelly Furtado's "Say It Right". Will Nelly tell Sports Guy "you don't mean nothing at all to me"?

(8) Christy Parvin vs. (9) Florida Gators, National Champions. The pride of Gainsville takes on the pride of wherever Christyis originally from.

(5) Nina Simone's "Feelin' Good" vs. (12) John Cena in "The Marine". Classy and jazzy takes on scripted mandrama

(4) Kellie Pickler vs. (13) The Drudge Report. Your site for news is up against your site for bubbly airheadedness.

The Kids Hot Chocolate Subregional

(1) OutKast's "Hey Ya" video against (16) Haley Heckman. Young Haley set to take on Andre, Dookiee & the entire Love Below

(8) Geico Caveman vs. (9) Sandra Oh. Will this battle be so easy a caveman could do it? Is she?

(5) NYC Jenni vs (12) Gil Grissom. Will NYC Jenni be looking too far ahead to a possible showdown with her enemy, Sandra Oh?

(4) Tommy McLeod vs (13) Fergie's "Fergalicious". Will Fergie's definition make Tommy go loco?

Check back tomorrow as the field of 65 is ripped in half...

Saturday, March 17, 2007

Deuce Madness Round Two Completed!

220 Saturday Afternoon...
Holy poo... so Thad Matta coached Xavier to the Elite Eight a few years ago, then bolted for The Ohio State, a team that hasn't played Xavier since an NIT game in the early 80s... Xavier, a college in Cincinnati, is a mere few hours away from Columbus, home of The Ohio State, but they say OSU won't play them... OSU says "Why should we? We're The Ohio F*$&&ng State."

So when Xavier beat BYU, it was all about the Battle for Ohio... and honestly, if I knew this much bitterness rested in this match, I probably would have picked Xavier... as it sands, Ohio State is up by 5 in OT.

A few things I've learned, however, from watching CBS basketball country:
1) This is truly our country. Not their country. Ouuuuur country.
1b) I hate John Mellencamp
2) "How I Met Your Mother" has a new episode coming up
3) Miller Lite won the Beer Cup for the 4th time
4) Gus Johnson is a lunatic.
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Oh yeah, at #5... Greg Oden is the greatest to ever play the game. According to CBS, anyway.

232pm, Saturday... Ohio State takes out Xavier at 78-71, and really, they didn't beat 'em... Xavier missed something like 348 3-pt shots in overtime. Anyway, everyone picked OSU, so add 10 to your score.

Had they lost, however... wow. It would have been a whole new Deuce Madness ballgame. Funny though, only two (Steph$ and Hawbaker) picked OSU to win it all, though Ohio State makes lots of appearances in all of your Final Fours and Elite 8s.

More scores tomorrow.
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Sunday afternoon, 150pm...

...just got in from a great lunch out at Happy China (crab rangoon rocks), and then... actually visited an open house--well, not really an open house, as they are being built as we speak--but a visit to a possible house/condo we might want to invest in... we shall see...

Anyway, turned on the tv just in time to see "the iron be unkind!" (Gus Johnson's words, not mine) as Virginia whiffed a game tying tre in a loss to Tennessee... and now is Purdue, beating Florida (only first half so far).

So here is where we stand... 1) DMO, 370... 2) Drew, 360... 3-tie) Brad, Tebershaw, Mark, 340... 6) Barnie, 335... 7-tie) The Idol, Daniel, 330... 9) Scott, 325... 10-tie) Steph$, JTay, Matta Latta, Hawbaker, 320... 14) Yours Truly, 310... 15) Garrett,305... 16-tie) Sarah, TomJ, Mikey, 300... 19) Tyler, 295... 20) Trey, 280

Back soon with more...

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Sunday Night, 1144pm...

Hmmph. So, Texas lost. I now am officially the first person in Deuce Madness '07 to lose their predicted champion. You know what, hold on one minute...

.....be back in a second...
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Sunday Night, 1150pm...

Sorry about that. I just took my bracket outside and let the neighbors dog take a big slam on it. That's about all its worth right about now. Its steaming in the crisp night.

So now that round 2 is over, here's where we stand... Mark & Barnie had stellar, stellar second rounds, nailing 14 of 16 games, while Scott & The Idol got 13 0f 16. Toss Drew's 12 right, and they are the only ones who picked up the 10 point bonus for getting at least 12 of 16. This was huge for Drewski, as it allowed him to tie DMO at the top, both at 410 points.

In 3rd is The Mighty Gainey at 400, while Barnie leaps into 4th with 395. The Idol is in 5th with 390, while Brad Latta is in 6th with 380. Scott is in 7th with 375, while Steph$, Daniel and Tebershaw all tie at 370 in 8th place.

Hawbaker is 11th with 360, and for 12th is a 6-way tie between JTay, Matta Latta, Sarah, TomJ, Mikey and Yours Truly (350). Rounding out the bottom is Tyler in 18th (335), Garrett in 19th (325) and Trey breaks 300 points (310) for last. Again.

Friday, March 16, 2007

Dave's First Ever Random Bracket

If you are looking for Deuce Madness updates & action, just scroll down to the posting Deuce Madness 2007, below this posting here. I'll update that same posting all weekend.

I've already given my affinity for tournaments and brackets... heck, even stupid ones like ESPN's "Wacky Bracket", the previously mentioned Chick Bracket or the current Birmingham News' "Face of Alabama" tourney intrigues me... and though I'm not sure that Brooke Smith should have won it, she deserved to make it past the first round. But I digress...

So, I started thinking, it's my blogsite, what if I did my own bracket? Bracket of what, though? Favorite stuff? No, that changes too much. Coolest stuff? No, that's the Top 100 of the Year. Hmm... what if it was random? I mean, completely random? As in, pick from the thousands, nay, millions of places, people, foods, movies, musicians, and so forth that I enjoy, and that make me happy... thus, was born the first ever "Dave's Random Bracket".

So, I gave myself a time limit--15 minutes--to come up with most random subjects I could... it's mostly stuff that is current for me, be it movies, music or whatever. Then I just used a spreadsheet, randomly put them into seeds, and then used the template I have for the NCAA Tournament.

65 random things... all vying for the coveted, first ever Steph Leann Random Bracket Championship Trophy, or SLRBCT for short, all broken into 4 regions: The Mikey Nipp Region, the iPod Region, the Paula Maddox Region and the Troy State Region... and the 16 in each region may or may not have anything to do with the region's title itself.

So, here's the match-ups--I don't yet know how to design a bracket online... so imagine the lines and brackets and future matchups:

THE MIKEY NIPP REGION
The Venti Caramal Macchiato Subregional
(1) Strong Bad... the bad boy of Homestar Runner
(16) The Samson Tigers... my hometown team, winning thier 2nd girl's b'ball state title

(8) Meredith Quintana... we just don't see her enough
(9) Red Hot Chili Peppers' "Snow"... early contender for my fave song of '07

(5) Wendy Garner... I heart Wendy
(12) The Purple Onion... I heart those chick-in-a-sack pita roll-ups

(4) The Shawshank Redemption... the only Steve King movie that beats the book
(13) Sister Act II's "Joyful Joyful"... one of the best music montages ever

The Tall Vanilla Bean Frappuccino Subregional
(6) Rick & Bubba... the funniest morning show ever
(11) The Mackey Clan... that's Paula, Josh, Brandon, Nicole and Mackey himself

(3) Ann Coulter... she's reached "Dave Celebrity Girlfriend Hall of Fame"
(14) The Erin Formerly Known as Coates... how cool has she become over the years?

(7) Kelly Clarkson... what is truly behind those hazel eyes?
(10) Survivor... could have been ranked higher, but for a down season

(2) The Big Wookiee... who is now Big Wookiee Daddy
(15) Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story... never get tired of this movie

THE iPOD REGION
The Double Tall Cafe Mocha Subregional
(1) Rush Limbaugh... the father of modern conservatism
(16) Winner of the Play-In Game

(8) The Amazing Race All-Stars... we're done with Rob & Amber, now let's punt Mirna and Charla
(9) Ashley Judd... the only reason "Double Jeopardy" is remotely watchable--or stomachable

(5) Ashley Spell... truly one of my ten favorite people right now
(12) Dale's Southern Grill... love their shrimp, Steph loves their steak

(4) Scott Latta... this kid will be writing for ESPN.com one day
(13) Ginny Weasley... my favote Harry Potter character

The Doppio Espresso subregional
(6) The Empire Strikes Back... second on the list of "Greatest Movies Ever"
(11) Ultimate Sue Storm... the hottest 2-D out there

(3) "Hard Rain" with Christian Slater... a truly great craptastic movie
(14) ESPN's SportsCenter... standard viewing for any day

(7) Katharine McPhee... I don't care what you say, I love love love her CD
(10) Factor 7... I'm holding out for the reunion tour

(2) The Rock... I still have a man crush on him
(15) Sweet Potato Casserole... I had to know Steph could do a decent SPC before I could marry her

THE PAULA MADDOX REGION
The Iced Tall Cafe Americano Subregional
(1) The Sports Guy... Bill Simmons is my sports writing hero
(16) Nelly Furtado's "Say It Right"... with Timbaland, a song buzzing in my head

(8) Christy Parvin... like Quintana, she just doesn't appear nearly enough
(9) Florida Gators, National Champions... no one predicted this in August of 06.

(5) Nina Simone's "Feelin' Good"... sultry, jazzy, cool
(12) John Cena in "The Marine"... craptastical cinema at its finest

(4) Pickles!... Kellie Pickler's new CD sounds kinda like Deana Carter--and Ilove Deana Carter
(13) The Drudge Report... besides my site, your one stop for all news

The Grande Soy Chai Subregional
(6) Hootie & the Blowfish... "Cracked Rear View", one of the finest album ever
(11) Kate Winslet... I'd watch her read the phone book

(3) Ryan Sherman... got himself a new job in the city
(14) Sarah McLachlan... Sa-rah's better than ice cream, its better than anything else that I've tried

(7) Nikki Brown... tall and awesome
(10) James & Jessica Hawbaker... what a cool couple

(2) O'Carrs Cheesecake... I've had cheesecake all over the east coast... and this tops them all
(15) Attacktix... a sport for men, for warlords, for stratergerists

THE TROY STATE REGION
The Kids Hot Chocolate Subregional
(1) OutKast's "Hey Ya" video... I could watch this video 50 times and still not tire of it
(16) Haley Heckman... one of my kids all growed up

(8) The Geico Caveman... when E! had this guy on the red carpet of the Oscars--classic
(9) Sandra Oh... my favorite Asian not named Michelle Malkin

(5) NYC Jenni... my favorite part of NYC not named Times Square
(12) Gil Grissom... quite simply, a pimp. A forensic science pimp

(4) Tommy McLeod... soon to be the Bill Cosby of the Deuce
(13) Fergie's "Fergalicious" video... I'm no longer ashamed to like Fergie. Okay, yeah I am.

The Grande Cinnamon Dolce Latte Subregional
(6) Lost... amazing storytelling. I'm patient for the big ending
(11) Shawn Michael's book... "Heartbreak & Triumph" is a cliche title, yet still intriguing book

(3) Mamma Mia!... my favorite Broadway show ever
(14) HBO's Autopsy... quite a guilty pleasure. Michael Baden is the real life Gil Grissom, and still a pimp

(7) Lily Allen's "Alright Still"... what a fun CD! It's like, Jagged Little Pill lite
(10) Sheryl Crow... all these years later, still hot, still cool and still awesomely awesome.

(2) Tyler Campbell... a great guy all around, and kinda cool in his own right (I said "kinda")
(15) Mythbusters... who doesn't like this show?

THE PLAY IN GAME
Hannah Pruitt vs Lisa Loeb & Nine Stories' "Stay"... one of my favorite people takes on one of my favorite songs, for the right to match up against top seed Rush Limbaugh.

How Do You Advance?
Randomly, of course. I have a vintage buffalo nickel, and I'm just going to flip it. Best out of 5. Because I don't have time to just sit and flip a coin all day (well, maybe I do, but I don't want to just sit around and flip a coin all day), I'll start on Monday, doing random matches throughout the week.

Saturday - Play in match
Monday - Doppio Espresso & Tall Vanilla Bean Frappuccino subregional
Tuesday - Iced Tall Cafe Americano & Kids Hot Chocolate subregional
Wednesday - Venti Caramal Macchiato & Grande Cinnamon Dolce Latta subregional
Thursday - Grande Soy Chai & Double Tall Cafe Mocha subregional

Admit it... you're curious... and if your name is in the bracket, you're quietly rooting for yourself

Thursday, March 15, 2007

Deuce Madness 2007!

Okay, so it's 1142pm on Thursday night, and here's the result of day one...

Most of the day, I was bored with the tourney... I mean, Mikey was texting me the game scores (only three texts, Steph, put the bat down), and it was just... well, boring. I mean, it stunk because I picked both Old Dominion and Davidson to advance, and both blew it, but it was just boring...

And then... VCU and Duke took it to the wire, in a game whose ending was almost as exciting as Creighton's 2 OT win over Florida in 2002 (the most exciting, electrifying basketball game I've ever watched).

I knew it... I called it... and in our basketball pool, Deuce Madness '07, I was one of 5 people--out of 20--who picked Duke to lose in the opening round... Jon Taylor, Jason Barnette (Barnie), David Mark Osborne (DMO) and weirdly enough, my wife, Steph. In fact, this might be the earliest in Deuce Madness history that we've got people already losing Elite 8 teams (yes, you, Mikey and Daniel).

As it stands, #1 is being shared by DMO, Tebe Shaw and Drew Morris, all with 150 points. Barnie is in 2nd with 145 (that Florida A&M loss will come back to haunt some people, won't it?). In 3rd, with 140, is Brad Latta, Mark Gainey, Yours Truly, Yours Truly's Chick and Daniel Powell. In 4th is Tyler Campbell and Scott Latta with 135, and Hawbaker, J-Taylor and Matta Latta is in 5th with 130. Gary "The Idol" Eubanks and Sarah Hasha share 6th with 120, with Garrett at 115 points, Tom at 110, Mikey at 100 and... sigh... poor Trey Cartledge at 90.


-----------

Ah, its 902pm on Friday night, and I've been doing everything from laundry to eating bad food to completing my first ever Random Bracket (above) to watching basketball... I found myself rooting for Texas AM-CC against Wisconsin, even though I picked them to make the 16. Nevada/Creighton was exciting up until Creighton lost, putting in the hole with three Sweet 16 picks gone. And Winthrop did everything they could to let Notre Dame win, but ND just wouldn't have it... and then, I turn on the tv after dinner only to see New Mexico State giving Texas all they could handle... which almost gave me a coronary, because I foolishly picked Texas to win the whole stinkin' thing.

As for my dream that Long Beach State would beat Tennessee and hit the 16? Simmons' summed it up: So much for Long Beach as an Upset Special -- they're losing by 22. I don't care. I'd pick 'em again. As long as Long Beach is in the motha------- house, we're all winners... Snoop should wake up and pour a 40 on the ground.

So, what's the scoring look like in Deuce Madness 07?
1) Drew & DMO - 260
2) Tebershaw - 250
3) Brad & Your's Truly's Chick - 240
4) JTay, Gainey, Hawbaker - 230
5) Garrett Cheney & Tyler C - 225
6) The Idol, Sarah, Matta Latta & Yours Truly- 220 (don't think the fact that I'm not only losing to my wife, again, but also Garrett Freakin' Cheney has escaped me)
7) Scotta Latta & Barnie - 215
8) Tom J & Mikey - 210
9) Trey - 190

Back after the late games are done...
______________________

Sigh... its 1153pm on Friday, and Round One is over.

I love March Madness. Ye, I hate March Madness... all the woulda coulda shoulda thoughts come into place... shoulda picked Winthop and Kentucky... coulda left Davidson off my bracket... sigh...

David Mark Osborne looks to make it 2 straight for the Osborne clan (his brother Jon Osborne won last year, a fact I forgot to mention in earlier emails... sorry 'bout that)... he now owns #1 all by his lonesome with 300 points even...

Drewski and Tebershaw have 280, while Brad, Steph$ and Daniel (!) all have 270. Hawbaker, JTay and Sarah have 260, while The Idol, Gainey and Yours Truly all have hit 250. Another three way battle rages between Cheney, Barnie and Tyler, all with 245 while Matta Latta, Tom J and Mikey have 240. Scott stays out of last with 235, while Trey stays out of everything but last with 220. (note: these are not official... I'm too tired to double check tonight)

This looks to be a very entertaining second round this weekend, especially in Deuce Madness because here are the people who have their Sweet 16 intact thusfar:
Tom, JTay, DMO, Steph$, The Idol, Barnie & Gainey,

By comparison:
Has Lost 1 from their Sweet 16: Tebershaw, Hawbaker, Drew, All Three Lattas, Tyler
Has Lost 2: Daniel (including two from his Elite Eight), Garrett
Has Lost 3: Trey, Sarah (including a Final Four team), Yours Truly, Mikey

Probably won't update 'til Sunday afternoon, so see ya then!!

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

The Idol & The Madness

Before we get to American Idol, I have to say I LOVE MARCH MADNESS... I mean, 65 teams in a basketball, one-and-done, tournament of which only about 10 have a legit shot of winning... the upsets, the favorites, the games, the endless hours of basketball. I think I just love brackets. I love the idea of one beats the other, moving on to face another who had just emerged victorious from their own match... no question, no crying, is simply you gotta keep winning.

WJOX has the Chick Bracket, which cracks me up. I, of course, voted, and am hoping for a Jenny McCarthy/Kellie Pickler/Ashley Judd/Rachel McAdams Final Four but if Lacey Chabert, Carrie Underwood or Reese Witherspoon make it instead, I'm okay with that too. Angelina Jolie is like Duke to me--overrated, on top way too long, and never been that attractive to begin with. My personal Final Four? Stephanie Dollar, Stephanie Leann Dollar, Stephanie Campbell Hyphen Dollar, and in an upset Steph Dollar, defeating Leann Dollar. Love you.

Anyway, I thought I would quickly give you the actual winners of the NCAA Bracket...

Here's who makes it to the second round, but gets bounced:
Arizona, Old Dominion, UNLV, Notre Dame, Virginia Tech, VCU (beating Duke!), Gonzaga, Michigan State, USC, Vandy, Boston College, Xavier, Virginia, Louisville and Creighton...

On Old Dominion, I have to share with you The Sports Guy's thoughts on 12 beating a 5:
This happens every March: There's an obvious 12-over-5 upset pick (in this case, Old Dominion over Butler) that sucks everybody in and/or freaks Vegas out to the point that they practically make the game a pick 'em (in this case, Butler by 1.5) ... and then the No. 5 team ends up winning and we all feel dumb.

Here's who's journey ends at the Sweet Sixteen:
Wisconsin, Davidson, Pitt, So Illinois, North Carolina, Washington State, Long Beach State and Creighton

And as far as Long Beach State goes, I've had them in my Sweet 16 since Sunday evening when I did my first bracket draft. I feel good about this on. And, again to the Sports Guy, I'm not alone:
Sorry, had to pick the Beach to win two games. I've been a Long Beach supporter ever since Dre' and Snoop brought Compton and the LBC together in "The Chronic." Which reminds me, how much would you pay for a March Madness sequence where a Long Beach State player dunks on a fast break, followed by Gus Johnson losing his mind for a second and screaming, "Long Beach in the motha****** house!" I think I'd pay $750.

So, in my Elite Eight:
Oregon over Florida (you read that right)... Kansas routs UCLA... Texas over Georgetown... and Texas A&M gigs a young Ohio State.

And one more soundbite from The Sports Guy, concerning Kevin Durant & Texas taking on the #1 seed North Carolina:
No way this tournament unfolds without one "Durant single-handedly destroys a much better team" game that can be replayed on ESPN Classic for the rest of eternity. Admit it, Tar Heel fans ... you're unequivocally terrified right now. Come on. Admit it. Get it out in the open. You'll feel better.

Final Four, and Finals...
Texas over A&M, Kansas over Oregon... and Texas over Kansas to win the title... I'm either going to look like a total moron, or a freakin' genius.

And if you think I'm absolutely scared to death of what I've just said, you are absolutely correct.

Oh yeah, American Idol:

So here we are, the first night of American Idol finals. Gotta keep up, for my faithful reader(s). Tonight is Diana Ross, which is scary, because… well, because she’s scary. I know about three Diana Ross songs that have nothing to do with The Supremes, and I’m hoping not to have a Wiz reference. As usually, I’ll just give you my thoughts and they sing their little hearts out, all hoping for my vote as the Next American Idol.

To recap, my faves so far are Jordin Sparks, Mindy Doo, Gina Rock and Chris Fo’ Patro’. And if we have five, toss in Blake Lewis.

Let’s get going!

Ah, first is former back-up singer Brandon Rogers, tossing out some Supremes with “You Can’t Hurry Love”. Wow… he sucks. I mean, righteously. I actually just heard his voice crack, and… what? How the heck do you forget the words to this song? I mean anyone who’s listened for ten minutes to 94.5 or Magic 96, or driven around the country with Stephanie, has heard this song about four times!!! What a dolt! I’m not sure I’d want him as a background singer… Randy didn’t like it… Paula is being nice (which means she didn’t like it)… Simon hated it.

Here’s little Mindy Doo… she’s singing “Home” (and in the meantime, Simon and Ryan are making more “I’m not gay, you are” jokes). Holy crap, Diana’s hair has its own freakin’ zip code. And… it’s a song from “The Wiz”. I’m going to assume that Mindy Doo is doing to do great and now fast forward the tape… partially because I don’t want to hear anything from “The Wiz”, and partially because I still have KidStuff lines to learn for tonight’s rehearsal.

For you guys, ya ever want to date, or at least make out, with someone for the longest time, but later you discover she’s a total flake, and you’re glad that never happened? Yeah, the former was me at 15 with Paula, the latter is me at 31 with Paula now. She’s crying. She’s actually crying. Now Mindy Doo is crying… Simon just compared her to a young Gladys Knight, and I think Mindy Doo is going to pass out.

What? Chris Sligh is singing “Endless Love”? This is actually one of the three Diana Ross songs I know (“I’m Coming Out” and “Missing You” are the other ones… oh yeah, and “The Theme from Mahogany (do you know where you’re going to?)” makes four)

Okay, so I think we should start a PBS kids show called “Where in the World is Chris Sligh?”, to find out where the fun natured big guy went… this is awful. Just awful. I preferred Mariah and Luther to Lionel and Diana in the original, just for note. Eeesh…

Randy just compared Chris’ take on it to Coldplay… yeah, the fact that comparison can be made tells you how bad this song was. Paula tells him he’s trying ultra hard to be ultra hip and cool. Whatever that means. Simon tells him he murdered the arrangement. I agree totally. And very few boos are coming from the audience.

Gina Rock is up now, singing “Love Child”. I gotta admit, as much as I think Diana Ross is one gin and tonic away from being Margo Kidder going crazy in the backyard, she’s nailing the feedback and instruction. Is it wrong that Gina Rock looks kinda hot tonight? Hmm.

Randy was bored, Paula is using about 385 words to say “I was also bored”, and Simon says “a middle pack performance”. I actually kinda liked it. Is it bad that I’m probably going to go find this song on iTunes?
Now, now… I never said I didn’t like Diana Ross’ few songs I know—I think “I’m Coming Out” is a great song—I just said she was scary.

Can I tell you how excited I am about this Cannonball Run ripoff “Drive”? I’m pumped.

Oh dear mercy… when Punjab comes in to meet Diana Ross, he hugs her, and the piano guy is holding back a laugh. Funny.

Punjab is tackling “Ain’t No Mountain High Enough”. Okay, I know this song (who doesn’t)… she did this with The Temptations, or the Four Tops (I can never tell them apart). I guess that makes five songs, but since she only does half of this one, and half of “Endless Love”, then two halves make one whole—still at four, right? I’m rambling to keep from paying attention to Punjab, who is just simply terrible. His hair is teased so much he actually looks like a more attractive girl than some I knew back in Samson.

Randy starts in with his patented “what’s going down, yo, dawg, yo, what’s going down yo, dawg dawg” in a way that makes it seem like something good is coming, and the contestant smiles, waiting for the praise, only to have Randy say “it wasn’t very good, dawg, yo”. Paula hated it, but uses 45 seconds to say “I hated it”. Simon didn’t take nearly that long.

Though I tried just now, I couldn’t say it any better than EW, who said this about Punjab: Really, I'm running out of words to describe how painful Sanjaya's performances have become. If he survives Wednesday's eliminations, I want everyone reading this column to lean out the window Thursday morning and yell, ''Who are you and why are you voting for him?''

And, oh dear, my sweet bundle of brown, Sabrina Sloan, is sitting on the couch watching Haley Scarnato sing her place. And she’s singing “Missing You”. Diana says “She has a recording studio voice instead of a live voice…” and that’s what you can say about Britney Spears versus Christina Aguliera. I’ve heard Britney is ghastly live, and while Christina may be a tramp, she’s a tramp that can wail. And while Haley may not be a tramp, she… well, she can’t wail. But honestly, she’s not that bad… well, she’s not that good either. I guess she’s cute in a Jennifer Herndon sort of way, but that’s all I got.

Randy and Paula didn’t like it, while Simon says “I didn’t think it was that bad”. That’s Simon’s way of not being mean, so as not to give America a reason to give her sympathy votes. Get’er out!

Phil Stacey looks like Peter Furler from Newsboys. Just a random thought. I want to like this guy, if only for my friends Matt and Ginger, who knew him from Lee University, but… he’s done nothing to really make me root for him. Actually, I’m just going to fast forward now.

It’s like someone was actually watching “Cannonball Run” and said “Hey, what if we made it into a tv series?” then someone else said “Hey, what if we make it a serialized drama?”, and then someone else said “Yeah, let’s give it an automobile term for a title, like ‘Fender’ or ‘Drive’ or ‘Steer’!”

So LaKisha is called Kiki… I can do that. Easier to remember how to spell. She’s singing “God Bless the Child”, a song from Diana’s movie “Lady Sings the Blues”. This is a song that only a black woman can truly sing. I mean, I guess certain white chicks can pull it off, but why try? “Release Me” from Wilson Phillips is a white chick song, this song is a black chick song. Not being racist, just speaking truth.

All three judges love Kiki, heaping praise upon her like usual. Has she missed a note this season? She’s like the Roger Federer of the American Idol world… she doesn’t lose, she doesn’t drop a set. Simon basically set up a Mindy Doo vs. Kiki throwdown by the end of the season.

Beatbox Blake makes his stage appearance now, doing a beat rendition of “You Keep Me Hanging On”, which is probably my favorite Supremes song. Actually, I kinda like the Kim Carnes version from the early 1980s, but don’t tell anyone.

He’s managed to turn the stage into a disco, while Paula is up and dancing. I think everything about that song was great… except for the singing itself. It was just… eeeh. Randy wanted it to be better, Paula says “You could have a hit with that”, and Simon just didn’t get it.

Stephanie Edwards is up next, and I kinda feel bad for her. She’s like… no one. Blake is The One with the Beatbox, Gina Rock is The One Who Rocks, Mindy Doo and Kiki are The Ones to Beat, Chris Sligh is The Funny One with the Fro, Brandon Rogers is The One Who is a Backup Singer, Punjab is The One No One Likes and Can’t Figure Out Why He’s Still Here, Haley is The Crying One Who Took Sabrina’s Place, Phil is The Bald Guy, Jordin is The Perky Teenager, C-Rich is The One Who Looks Like Justin… and Stephanie? She’s just here. She can sing great… but she’s just here.

It’s “Love Hangover”. She’s got a great voice, reminds me of Jade and SWV and En Vogue, those great R&B chick groups from the 90s. Um… what else do I say about Stephanie?

Up next is Chris Richardson, singing some song called “The Boss”… perhaps I’ll recognize it as it goes along… um… wait for it… wait for it… wait for it…

…nope. Have no clue what this song is, and I already don’t like it. It might be that gawd-awful white striped tie on the blue shirt. I tried wearing a blazer and tie with jeans back when I was pledging Farmhouse Fraternity, on Mondays when we had to dress up. I got in trouble for it.

Perhaps I have made this joke before, but if you’re standing in line getting your gov’ment cheese and yo’ gov’ment butter, when they hand you your gov’ment Justin Timberlake, you get Chris Richardson. Actually, I think C-Rich and Blake Lewis may have fathered JT.

Randy liked it, just okay. Paula loved it. Simon said “Dreadful”… I agree with it, but more likely because the song was crap.

And finally, it’s Jordin Sparks closing out the show! The Young Jordin is singing “If We Hold On Together”, and I think Diana Ross is thrown for a loop by a young girl with hair as big as her own, yet looks good with it.

Great. The song was featured in “The Land Before Time”. I can’t freakin’ get away from that movie. It haunts me.

Jordin is doing the patented “sit on the side of the stage and sing a slow, inspirational song”. I’m inspired. And with the close-ups, it looks like she missed a few when she was plucking her eyebrows. I’m just saying.

Randy says “You just made it a three-girl race”. Paula takes her cliché comments, switches them around for their intended recipient, and let her sunshine fly. Simon says “Gooey, but very good vocal.”


I have Friday off, and intend on watching basketball all day... and keeping an online diary. Stay tuned.

Thursday, March 08, 2007

The Death of Captain America

Sigh... we'll get to Cap in a moment, but first, we have to go through some Idol stuff...

...so here I was, just home from work, already kissed my wife and chatted with her for a moment before she goes to sleep (she even looks ravishing with no makeup on and in her pjs... how frackin' lucky am I, huh?) and came into the other room to pop in the recorded tape and watch Idol.

First, I check my email... one from my buddy Ty, there's an ongoing email about Attacktix that is totally out of control, and hey, a blog comment from my buddy
NYC Jenni. For those of you who don't know, 99% of the time the posting I write here on blogspot also gets posted on my MySpace page, so I usually have two different audiences reading the same blog (several thousand page views combined, thank you very much... I'm not a Rammer Jammer blog, but hey, its a start).

I click on the link to read the
comment that NYC Jenni left and, in big print, I read "NO NO NO NO NO! They just voted off our girl Sabrina??!!?? America sucks". Whilte its not uncommon to hear liberals say "America sucks", did she have to tell me about Sabrina? Sigh. I guess we'll still watch it now... of course, my worst fear is that Sabrina has been Barbaized...

The mandatory reviews of the guys and girls... for the record,it was Rare Earth who sang "I Just Want to Celebrate", it was 311 who sang "All Mixed Up" and Chris Sligh was, in fact, covering a dcTalk song. Oh, and even Michael Slezak on
EW had trouble remembering who Haley Scarneto was, so I don't feel bad at all.

As the show starts, knowing this is coming is like knowing you have to go to work tomorrow with someone you really don't like, or knowing that you have an uncomfortable exam coming up... or maybe a part you don't like in a movie you do, a scene that makes you cringe (I am thinking of the scene when Mr. Holland almost leaves his wife for Rowena... I hate hate hate that whole plot)

Anyway, Blake and Lakisha are safe and in the Top 12. All together now... duhhh.....

Here comes Chris Sligh. America voted... and he is safe. Jordin Sparks... and she's in the Top 12 as well.

Here comes Phil Stacey... he feels nervous--and should with that stupid hat. And he's in the Top 12 as well (and looks amazed that he is). Here comes Jared... I'm guessing his journey ends here. And I was right! When Ryan asks him if he is surprised, he responds "very". I wonder what he would have said if Ryan had asked I'm if he expected to move on, like Ryan asked Chris (who wisely replied, "to keep from looking foolish,I'm going to say 'hopefully'")

Melinda Doolittle (I like the nickname Mindy Doo) and Brandon Rogers come up. Both are former backup singers, and both are now up-front singers, both in the Top 12.

Here comes Chris Richardson and Gina Glocksen... both in the Top 12! This is good, this is good... if I didn't know the upcoming bad news, I'd be really excited. Darn you, NYC Jenni! Darn you!

Now, its a recap of Carrie Underwood's journey from wannabe to Idol, and honestly, she deserves it... "Some Hearts" is a really, really good record. Yes, yes, "Jesus Take the Wheel" is a little schlocky after hearing it a few thousand times on the radio, but "Before He Cheats" is just darn clever, and the rest of the CD is really good.

Here comes Antonella and Stephanie. FINALLY!!! Freakin' Antonella is GOING HOME... Stephanie Edwards goes to the Top 12. An-ho-nella is crying a little... and that means...

...wait a minute... Sabrina is left... Haley is left... only one more girl can make it, and we know that Sabrina is going home, so... freakin' Haley Scarneto made it? What the crap???

Here comes Sabrina and Haley... I almost want to cuss. Part of me, deep down inside, wanted NYC Jenni to be totally jockin' on me, and would be laughing at me when I found out Sabrina made it, but no... Haley is in. Oh, and the proper name of this song is "Don't Let Go (love)", not "Hold On" as I gave it to you yesterday. It came out in the fall of 1996, my senior year in college. Or, at least, my first senior year (I graduated a two-year senior, mind you).

And now, finally, Punjab and Sundance, with one spot left. Personally, I like Sundance better. I think Punjab might have a better voice, but over the last few weeks, he's sucked wind totally. I mean, heck, someone has to be voted out of the Top 12 first--wait, that will be Haley... okay, someone has to be voted out of the Top 11, so why not Sundance?

And Sundance goes home... Punjab moves on to the Top 12. I have a feeling he might become the John Stevens/Anthony Federov of this year's American Idol... Paula says "I don't understand... this is a singing competition" and Simon retorts "the volume was turned down at home" with a look of "what-the-heck-are-these-stupid-americans-thinking" on his face...

So there's your Top 12. Last year, my Fave Four was Daughtry, Pickles, My Girl McPhee and Taylor, all of which did really well... so this year, I'm officially putting my full support behind Mindy Doo, Jordin Sparks, Chris Sligh and Gina Glocksen.

Okay... now to the real story...

Captain America died on Wednesday. Gunned down as he climbed the courthouse steps in custody.

Let's stop right here and say that anyone who just had the thought "What? He's grieving over a comic book character? What a moron!", you can stop reading right here. You done judging?

A Few Things First
For those of you who aren't comic fans, you would probably be shocked how comics parallel society and politics, especially Marvel. Marvel is the publisher of X-Men, Fantastic Four, Daredevil, Ironman, Spiderman, Hulk and yes, Captain America... the other publisher, DC Comics, owns Superman, Wonder Woman, Batman, Flash and so on...

If you read that last sentence again, you can tell why I merely like DC and love Marvel... DC characters are almost godlike, from other worlds, with powers that are supernatural and... well, other-worldly.

Peter Parker was bitten by a radioactive spider... Spiderman. Matt Murdock was hit by chemicals... Daredevil. Tony Sparks uses a pimped out suit of armor to be Iron Man. Ben Grimm, Reed Richards and Sue & Johnny Storm were hit by cosmic rays, Bruce Banner by gamma rays to become the Fantastic Four and Hulk respectively... it's like they were all normal people until fate handed them their powers... yes, yes, its fantastical and fantasy, but still, Marvel's characters are so much more relatable...

A Little History
As is Steve Rogers, Captain America. Created in 1941 just as the country entered World War II, he was a representative of freedom, victory, and America's strength. The story goes that Steve Rogers was born before the Depression, and wanted to enter the military, but couldn't because he was so small and puny.

So Steve volunteered for a special "weapons" project in which he was given sort of a "super soldier serum". Hence, he became known as "Weapon 1". For comparison, the character of Wolverine is "Weapon X", the 10th in the Weapons program from the military (his mutant powers is healing, the steel skeleton was given to him).

During a mission in 1945, he and his sidekick Bucky were blown out of an exploding plane, with both thrown into the freezing waters of the North Atlantic. In the comic world, different men are given the title of Captain America, but in the 70s, they discover Steve Rogers in a block of ice. He is unfrozen, rehabbed and joins, then leads, The Avengers. For the full story, you can read the
Wikipedia page on Cap.

What He Meant Then
He was America. In a time, back in the 40s, when all Americans had to go on was what they heard on a badly receptive radio and those news footage reels we have all seen, Captain American was a take-no-prisoner patriot who went in and issue after issue, kicked Nazi butt every month. Captain America #1, one of the most famous covers of all time, has him punching Hitler right in the face.

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Of course, nowadays, Cap would be charged with assault, as libs would want to understand Hitler, talk to him, find out why he's so angry. Because if we talk to him, then things will be all better. Right?

Marvel Civil War
Like I said, comics change with the time, and when Civil War came about last year, it was just huge. I even listed it as the
#10 Coolest Thing of 2006... bottom line is, Tony Stark (Iron Man) is heading a Superhero Registration Act, which requires all superheroes to register their information and identity to the government to get a "license" as a superhero. This comes as a result of a huge accident in Stamford, CT, where some foolish hero team ends up killing hundreds of civilians.

Captain America goes underground, thinking the whole thing is wrong, an invasion of his freedom and his privacy, and takes with him half the Marvel Universe... the other half stays with Iron Man. Sue and Reed Richards are on the verge of a divorce, and the Fantastic Four is shattered... Peter Parker has already revealed his identity to support Tony Stark (and later regrets it, joining Captain America--and ends up facing off against Iron Man as well) only to have Aunt May gunned down by Kingpin in retaliation for all the trouble he's caused... and then there's Steve Rogers...

In Issue 7, a huge battle ensues in NYC between all the heroes, including Captain America vs. Iron Man, and Cap is kicking the begeezus out of him... when an angry mob of people come and attack Cap, holding him down... he then realizes what he, and his followers, have been doing, and it suddenly dawns on him that this fight is not worth the cost. Good guys taking on good guys, no one wins.

Its also this moment that the reader realizes that Captain America represents an America which is in danger of dying... an America that puts freedom and victory above all, an America where fellow citizens will do anything to protect each other, an America which is proud to be the most powerful, most free, most incredible country on Earth.

He turns himself in to authorities, and the story picks up in Captain America #25. He is being led up the courthouse steps when he is taken out by a sniper. He's a super-soldier, but he's not super-human. He can be, and is, killed. And with it, dies the America I just told you about, at least in the comics.

Oh, he'll be back, I'm sure. Some day down the road, Marvel will find a way to resurrect Captain America, be it he wasn't really dead (though he sure as heck looks it) or he was brought to life again by some weird means (this happened to Ben Grimm--The Thing--two years ago in one of the most ridiculous stories I've ever read)... even Colossus came back in a way that I still don't understand...


...but what is dead for good is the idealistic, patriotic, freedom loving Captain America that I loved. Most comic writers are liberals, you can tell by many of the stories, and even lines, that are written... and a new Cap will reflect that.

Its the same way I felt when Jim Henson died, or when Charles Schulz died--no more real Kermit, no more new Charlie Brown... and no more real, new Captain America.


Rest in peace, Cap. Rest in peace.

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Tuesday, March 06, 2007

Wednesday Night in Idolotry (live updating)

Alright... at church earlier, but now I am here, VCR playing, woman watching with me... scroll down for the chicks...

8 guys left in American Idol, only 6 manly spots in the Finals, so its time to hear them again, and kick out the 2 that just don’t have it. Who will become the next Matt Rogers, the next Julia Damato, the next Amy Adams as the person who gets kicked off within the first few weeks of the finals?

Blake Lewis is first, revealing something about himself that America doesn’t know… apparently he’s a comedy fan, showing us a redneck character called Jimmy. It kinda sounds like Ace Ventura’s & Firemarshall Bill’s love child.

He’s singing a song that I vaguely remember, that sounds kinda familiar… hmm… it’s not bad, whatever it is. He tosses in his beatbox effortlessly, making it actually sound easy, and it blends really well into the song. Randy thought it was hot, and he didn’t recognize the song. Paula loved it, and didn’t know the song. Simon says, “I didn’t understand a word you said… but you stand out.” How can you not like Blake Lewis. The band is 311, the song is… I have no clue.

Ryan informs us that after the break, we’ve got John Mayer and Pearl Jam from Punjab and Sundance… I’m not sure if that’s respectively, and I’m not sure if I want it to be… or don’t want it to be… I’m confused.

Punjab's revelation? He can hula, like in Hawaii. Um... I'm not sure I have a joke here.

He's singing John Mayer' "Waiting for the World to Change." A few things... I think as time goes by, "No Such Thing" will be considered a brilliant song. Because... well, it just is. Much better than that "Daughter" crap. Another thing... John Mayer's hair is out of control. Finally, when he sings, he looks like he's going to eat the microphone.

I say all this to avoid looking at Punjab, who is like an Indian version of Pat from SNL. Randy didn't like it, wondering what happened to the Sanjaya who auditioned with a fantastic Stevie Wonder tune. Matter of fact, my pal Lauri at Starbucks and I were wondering the same thing. Simon didn't like it, and told him he had Paula hair. Ha!!

Big Sundance is up, telling us that he's thin in real life, wearing a fat suit for TV. Funny. He's taking on "Jeremy" from P...

...wait, wait, wait a minute... what did he just say? (rewinding tape twenty seconds)

...okay, phew. The line actually is "...clearly I rememer picking on the boy, seemed a harmless little f--k", and Sundance tossed in the wod "punk". Had me fooled. Anyway, it's Pearl Jam. Is this one word or two? PearlJam? Pearl Jam? Was the band really named for Eddie Vedder's grandmama Pearl's homemade jam? I need to know this stuff. Has there ever been a rock star who has taken himself more seriously than Vedder? Except for maybe Bono?

Camera pans to the band, they are jamming--and rightly so... this is a jamming song. The song actually sounded like a garage band. Randy liked the Southern rock feel to it. Paula enjoyed the "sundance groove", whatever the crap that is. Simon says he went from charming last week to bar singer this week.

Simon then adds, "Sounds like you were shouting the song," to which both myself and Randy, at the exact time, responds, "have you heard Pearl Jam?"

Is it just me, or is Will Ferrill planning on going through fifteen movie genres with the same schtick? News. Check. NASCAR. Check. Skating. Check.

Ryan just introduced us to Travis Tritt sitting in the audience. I mean, he hasn't had a hit in what, ten years, but "Country Club", "T-R-O-U-B-L-E" and "The Whiskey Ain't Workin" (with Marty Stuart) is fine, fine good country music. For my money, you can't get more guilty pleasure out of much than you can with "Anymore" (and its schlockly video with him in a wheelchair at a military vet hospital)... and for you young folk, Travis Tritt sang the song that coined the phrase "Here's a Quarter, Call Someone Who Cares".

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He's a member of a country club... country music is what he loves... he drives an old Ford pickup truck... does his drinking from a dixie cup...

Final Travis Tritt thought... I imagine Quincy Jones sitting at home with his biz-nitches, furious that some white punk fruit booty like Ryan Seacrest cut him off a few weeks ago when he was trying to promote "The Color Purple", and here he is giving screen time to redneck hillbilly Trittin' Travis, or whatever, to promote his album. "Hey ho! Gimme the number for Al Sharpton! I'll have that Ryan Seabass paying reparations faster than you can say 'George Bush hates black people'!"

And if you think all of that was just to use the phrase "fruit booty", well... you're right.

Chris Richardson played football in college. Um... so? What the heck with all the songs I don't know?

Okay, one minute in, and I'm bored. Close-ups make him look like a welfare state Justin Timberlake. Randy loved the song. Paula loved it. Simon? He thought it was good. Cutesy. Nasally.

Jared Cotter played Division II college basketball. All together now... So?

Still trying to place his song, but I am enjoying his Cosby sweater. Ah, it's a Stevie song... "If You Really Love Me"... Jared is thisclose to having a unibrow. Okay, so while Paula is actually criticizing Jared (after Randy liked him), Simon has that "will you just shut up" look on his face, kinda like Scott Latta gets when he's watching a Tommy Tuberville news conference or Michael Nipp gets when Ty starts talking about his Bob Riley parties.

However... Simon agrees with Paula, amazingly.

Ryan Seabass (don't you love it when bloggers revel in thier own jokes?) tells us either Phil Stacey or Brandon Rogers is going to sing Leann Rimes. Wow, I can't wait. Dripping with sarcasm. This means, of course, that Fro' Patro' is last, which is really the cherry spot in the whole show.

After commercial, Ryan is asking Phil and Brandon about the show, and Brandon is discussing not holding anything back (channeling Dan Fouts, a la the Bourbon Bowl, I believe).

Brandon reveals to us that he's a classical piano player. See, that's a good fact--not "I played college ball". I can totally see him as an Amos Lee or John Legend type entertainer. And from the fact he's busted up with "I Just Want to Celebrate", we can safely assume he's not covering Leann Rimes tonight.

Except for the ending, Randy liked it. Paula says "feeeeee-nominal". Simon says he's nervous for Brandon this week after that song.

Phil Stacey tells us that he wasn't always bald... in college, he had long hair, but had to cut it short for a band he was in... and ended up just shaving it. I only go into this much detail, because the college was Lee University, and Matt & Ginger Latta and Leslie Cordellsworth knows/knew him. Just thought it was worth a mention.

And yes, Phil is singing "I Need You" from Leann Rimes. Maybe its just me, but his outfit, his weird hat, the song, the spin he's putting on the song, and that deep voice he's putting on a song I'm used to hearing Leann sing... well, its strange.

Randy compared Phil to Steve Perry from Journey, but only in the sense he has good high range. Paula says, "Odd choice of song." Simon agrees with me... hat, outfit, voice.

And finally, Chris Sligh, who tells us that he had short hair once. And he's busting out with "We All Wanna Be Loved"... I only know the dcTalk version from the "Supernatural" album... was that a remake? Am I a musical moron? How did I miss this?

I think Chris is taking good care of the song, as in, doing quite well with it. He even does the Bo-Bice-Grabbing-The-Mic-Stand thing. Randy says, "Not a stellar night for the guys, but you get the vocal prize", while Paula says "middle of the road." She's almost kinda mean tonight. Simon didn't like the middle of the song.

Okay, so Chris just said that its not a well known song, so maybe he did just do dcTalk... I can't find my copy of "Supernatural" to check the credits. While you are looking up the Pearl Jam/PearlJam thing, let me know this too.

So that's your guys night.


AND NOW THE GIRLS...

Ryan Seabass is wearing a Kris Dekker turtleneck, and it seems Paula is missing. Check the mini-bar.

Ah, the tap has run out... Paula is sitting between Randy and Simon... and when Simon said "she was under the desk", Randy makes a bad sex joke...

Jordin Sparks up first, revealing she likes football. And she's taking on Pat Benatar! The thingI love about Pat Benatar is that she's one of those artists that you don't realize how many cool songs she had until you start hearing them... "Love is a Battlefield", "Heartbreaker", "HitM Me With Your Best Shot", and of course, "Invincible", the theme to the immortal movie "The Legend of Billie Jean"... then it dawns on you, she was freakin' awesome.

Jordin here was doing great until she hit rough note that made Steph's face scrunch. And she hit it again (my face just scrunched). Not bad... good rockin song. Dare I say pitchy?

Steph, doing her Randy impression, says "you're hot!". Randy said "pitchy" but was excited, as was Paula. Simon said "shreiky and manic", but he kinda liked it. Maybe its the heels, but she has at least two inches on Ryan.

Sabrina Sloan is up now, possibly my 2nd favorite. She tells America that she wanted to be Katie Couric... finally, something fun!

Uh oh... she's taking on En Vogue's "Hold On (don't let go)", a big comeback song for them back in 97 after they were so popular in the early 90s. The comeback didn't last, because this one song was it. I always liked the first line of the chorus, where it says "Whatcha gonna be, I can't pretend, oh...", cause I like to sing "whatcha gonna be, I play Nintendo..." It works, and its fun to say.

Randy uses "you did your thing" and "wrong song choice" phrases, while Paula tosses some sunshine her way. Simon agrees with Randy. He also suggests personality, saying her song sounded like a hotel resort performance.

Antonella is a violinist. And an internet soft core porn star. Ha! I can't place the song she's singing, Steph asks if it's from a commercial. I'm totally rooting for her to bomb, so American can kick her happy tail to the curb... ah, its Corinne Bailey Rae, and I'm afraid she's actually decent tonight. Crapola.

Randy liked the Corinne "joint". Randy tells her that she should have more confidence, thogh can you blame her with the beating these three have given her the last few weeks? Paula says "right song choice" but cautions her on range. Simon is speechless, finally saying "you've gone as far as you can go... your surrounded by better singers". He even commends her on handling herself with the media, but ends up saying "I wish you were better".

After Antonella, Simon and Ryan go back and forth, Paula wants us to all to get to a warmer place. Um... next singer?

With Stephanie, Jordin, Lakisha, Sabrina, Melinda, my love for Gina, the issues with Anhonella... I keep forgetting Haley Scarneto is in this show. She tells us she was a gymnast. She's singing... I have no clue.

Whatever it is, its getting her a plane ticket home tomorrow. "If My Heart Had Wings", maybe? She said that line, like, four times. Randy kinda liked it okay, but it was missing the "yo!" factor. Paula struggles to find sunshine to give her. Simon thought it was a horrible song, and then, channeling the brain of Yours Truly, he actually says "I don't think I know your name..." I feel ya.

Here comes Stephanie Edwards! My Steph and I were talking about who's going to make it, and I missed Steph-Ed' revealing of her "secret"... probably something stupid like "I like cheddar cheese".

My Steph asks what Steph-Ed is singing... I dunno. We're lamenting on the fact all these songs are foriegn to us. I liked the song... (its a Chaka Khan song)...

Randy says "just okay". Paula gives great sunny fluff. Simon agrees with Randy. I see her as a Latoya London-type singer. Randy says "Its good you like Chaka, but no one can do it like Chaka cause Chaka's already done it."

My Stephanie pipes up and says "But Whitney did it" (referring to "I'm Every Woman" from The Bodyguard), to which I replied "But that's Whitney" and she responds "Yeah, that's what I'm saying... you just have to do it better."

Which leads us to LaKisha (who is terrified of animals, apparently. All kinds. My Steph agrees... then adds "seriously, whoever heard of "I'm Every Woman" til Whitney did it. I mean, who's Chaka Khan?")

LaKisha is singing "I Have Nothing", again from The Bodyguard, one of the finest craptastic movies ever, and one of my favorite Whitney songs to sing in the car. She looks bigger in different outfits (Steph says "yeah, that's how that works"). Steph says "its alright... like Whitney". Randy says "another great performance." Paula loves her, saying "you don't have to run anywhere", and I think she just made a reference to the wrong Whitney Bodyguard song. Simon says "passion, talent, Yo..." Simon adds "... you look beautiful..." and Steph pipes in "gaw, what is she, a triple E or something?"

My homegirl Gina has lucky charms, including a stuffed animal name Pickle, a picture pillow and a troll charm. Sh's singi... no, she's rocking some Evanenaenanaence, or however you spell that band. Hey, I'm loving this... she's throwing down on "Wake Me When You're Sober". Halfway through it, though, she looks like she's out of breath... not good times.

Randy loved the rock, Paula agreed completely. This is who they thought she was. And Simon? He said she looked comfortable, finally, and really hopes she makes it through. And she gives a shout out to the band.

And finally, its Melinda Doolittle! She's partly OCD. I love her.

She's throwing down on the 70s soul classic "I'm A Woman", and I truly think she can win this competition. Loved the song, loved the peformance.

Randy says she was the hottest of the night. Paula pours a bucketful of sunshine on her head. Simon calls her a little tiger... she was fantastic...

I'm hoping we shed ourselves of An-ho-nella and Haley, but Stephanie figures Antonella will make it, pushing Gina, Jordin or Sabrina out (kinda like Ayla Brown was booted way too early for someone I don't even remember)

So, we're done here. Tomorrow... we talk American Idol... and the death of Captain America.