I love countdowns and rankings and lists of things that are good and lists of things that are bad, and so on and so forth... and at the end of the year, I spend hours looking at Year End Best and Year End Worst of just about anything.
And every year, I even do my own Top 100 Coolest Things of the Year... and every year, when it comes to movies, I like to find my ten favorite films of the year. And the last week of the year, I try to bear down and see a few films that I might have missed before the midnight bells chime, bringing 2011 to our doorsteps.
Random picture of The Goddess, only because I haven't
mentioned her in quite a while.
Right now, The Lovely Steph Leann and I are watching "The Kids Are Alright", starring three people that I really, really like... Annette Bening, who does one of my favorite roles of all time in my 30th favorite film of all time... Julianna Moore, who is one of my favorite actresses and was a pre-goddess to me before The Goddess became The Goddess (and before I fell in love with Amy Adams, of course)... and Mark Ruffalo, who happens to be likable in just about anything and everything.
So, Annette and Julianne play Nic and Jules, respectively, who are lesbians in love, and are mothers to two kids, Joni and Laser. Yes, Laser. So, the kids end up finding out who did the "donation" to make their own lives possible, and they end up meeting him, and hilarity, heartbreak, drama and issues ensue.
I can say this, even before the movie is finished playing out... its well acted. All three leads, Bening, Moore and Ruffalo are playing their own parts perfectly, the story is well done, and the plot, for what its worth, is consistent with no holes or silliness to drag it down.
But... a Christ Follower, how does one enjoy such a film? The premise of the film itself, two lesbians and their relationship, disrupted by the sudden appearance of their children's sperm donor, spits in the face of what we as Christ Followers believe to be true, right and just according to Scripture and our own belief in God.
Let's be clear here... I love movies. I love watching movies, I love how they make me feel, I love breaking apart a film to dissect it, I love thinking about movies that stick with me, I love enjoying Craptastic films that aren't supposed to be anything other than Crapstatic. And yes, I enjoyed "The Hangover". And yes, I get a kick of watching "American Pie 2". And I did see "Boogie Nights" and thought it, taking into consideration the premise again, was a very well done film.
So to sit here and say "Oh, I can handle the potty humor of 'The Hangover' and I think its hilarious!" and then follow it up with "'Boogie Nights' was enjoyable and Julianne Moore was awesome!" (which, by the way, she was), only to turn around and say, "I don't like the premise of 'The Kids are Alright' because its just too wrong," is a little hypocritical. But yet, I will say those very things.
What's the difference? I dunno. I don't pretend to know. I never saw "Brokeback Mountain", and not because I am homophobic... I never saw it mostly because all the things I'd heard from people around me was what I suspected--take out the man on man relationship and make it a normal (and I said normal, get over it) man on woman relationship, and its suddenly a boring film about a bad romance, with beautiful scenery. So, knowing the movie isn't that good, why do I want to see two guys getting it on? I don't, and I haven't.
So, back to "The Kids Are Alright"... the language is raw. Tons of F-Bombs. Julianne Moore is naked, though she does that in many of her films. There are several, and I mean several, sex scenes. The lesbian couple watches gay porn to stimulate their own relationship. The son is named Laser. These are all the things that are wrong about this film. As a movie fan, I'm sure you can catch this on Hurricane Rhett's favorite channel, Logo, in a year or so, or maybe the Oprah Network or something later. As a Christ Follower, I have to tell you, avoid it. Just avoid it at all costs.
However... if you want to see brilliance from these three leads...
Julianne Moore: "Evolution"... one of the most enjoyable, funny pieces of crap ever put on film. Its stupid, its idiotic, and its hilarious. "Children of Men"... its bleak, its dark, its futuristic and its amazingly done "Boogie Nights"... I can't recommend this film to you, because its the life of a porn star. I would tell you to watch it on one of those "Cut out the bad parts!" devices you can find at LifeWay, but all you'd see would be a title card and the credits. But Julianne Moore is phenomenal in it.
However, since we are discussing to good lookin' Julianne Moore and her films... avoid at all costs "The Forgotten", one of the single worst films I've ever seen in my whole life. Its awful. Its terrible. And what's worse is, it starts out as a really good film... and then tanks, hard. Bad. Its terrible.
Annette Bening: "Mars Attacks"... talk about stupid and brilliant, at the same time. A great cast, and a great turn by Bening. "The Grifters"... Once again, its a R rated film with a lot to it, but its a great story and a great movie all around. John Cusack is especially awesome. "The American President"... I cannot tell you how much I love this film. I came up with the term "A Sydney Ellen Wade" performance for Annette Bening's turn as the love interest of President Shepherd. Every scene she's in, she shines, every word she speaks, she glows and few times have I ever seen someone look so good on camera. Except Amy Adams, whom I'm in love with.
Mark Ruffalo:
"13 Going On 30"... Yes, its a silly rom-com, and yes, Jennifer Garner has The McGriddle Effect all over her, but Mark Ruffalo is just charming enough to make guys like him, and make The Lovely Steph Leann jus swoon. "Shutter Island"... He co-stars with Leo DiCaprio, and holds up well. The movie is a little over-ambitious, and it almost pulls off being a mind-blowing cinematic experience, only to end up being a really good film with a somewhat predictable twist... but that's not on Ruffalo. "Collateral"... When making the 2010 edition of The Dave100, I struggled with this film. See it for Jamie Foxx and Tom Cruise, and how good they are. And enjoy Ruffalo's supporting role.
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I had one really long list (and subsequently, long post) of movies that I've seen in the last few months--some are new and recently in theaters, some are just on dvd, and a few are movies that I haven't seen in a long, long time that I gave another crack at.
So, I figured I'd break this up into a two part post in that very fashion... today, its the movies that are currently in the theaters and maybe Monday, a few new movies I've seen on DVD and a few random movies I've (re)watched and can give my now somewhat refined movie critique on...
But let's start with ones I've seen in the theaters in the last few months... you can read my review of "Iron Man 2", which I thought deserved its own post, by clicking here, and in this post, we're going to talk about "Losers", "Kick A**", "Robin Hood", "Date Night ", "The Book of Eli" and my favorite movie of the year so far...
"How To Train Your Dragon"
Okay... so, this was a film that I wasn't sold on leading up to its release date. Call me a Disneyphile, or a Pixar snob, but DreamWorks animation doesn't do it for me. From "Antz" to "Shark Tale" to "Over the Hedge", then toss in movies that everyone tells me I should love but don't, that being "Madagascar" 1 and 2(and 3 when its released), and Shrek 1, 2, 3 and Fourth, and you've got a studio that I'm just not wild about. Don't get me wrong, I'm not anti-Dreamworks, as I enjoyed "Kung Fu Panda" and have heard good things about "Monsters vs Aliens", but put it all together, and "How to Train Your Dragon" was a film that I'd just see when I got around to seeing it.
And if the opening numbers were any indication, I was right. It opened slow and seemed like another also-ran in DWA's studio. But... as the weeks wore on, the gross for the film kept going up and up and up, and everyone and anyone who told me about this movie didn't just like it, they loved it. Kids, adults, old and young, everyone I know liked, if not loved, this film. So, at some point, I figured The Lovely Steph Leann and I should go see it... we were even told that this is a rare case where 3-D enhances the film, not just enhances the ticket price. "Avatar" was the only other film I'd seen in 3-D where that was the case, but we went ahead and went 3-D.
"How to Train Your Dragon" follows the story of Hiccup, who lives in a Viking village where the life of a Viking is to hung and kill dragons of every size--and they are aplenty in this movie. Hiccup is a loser that is made fun of by most of the clan, mostly because his heart is not into hunting anything, much less dragons, but to please his father--who happens to be village chief, no less--he does what he can.
Hiccup ends up taking down a rare Night Fury dragon, but upon finding it in the woods, cannot bring himself to finish him off... and there, the adventure takes flight, pun intended.
I loved it. I loved every single second of this movie. I loved the main character, Hiccup, I loved his love interest, a spry pixie named Astrid, I loved the dragons, including the main one nicknamed Toothless, I loved the setting, I loved the creativity, I loved the story... I thought this movie was brilliant. This was the first time I'd ever seen a non-Pixar animated movie and thought, "This should have been a Pixar film."
The Lovely Steph Leann loved it too. As the credits began to roll, she piped up and said, "Wow. DreamWorks finally got it right."
Its one of those rare movies that I feel like was just the right length, and had very little, if any, wasted minutes. And, in another rare instance, I fully recommend 3-D glasses on this one, even if you have to see it in a matinee. Its vividly colored, and I don't feel like the 3-D dampens that, but there's something about the depth of the film and the scope of the picture that you get from the 3-D that you might not get otherwise... again, like "Avatar".
Great movie, my favorite so far of the year.
“The Losers”
Okay... so, this group of guys who make up this elite fighting force are framed for a village slaughter and left for dead. And what do they do? They are on a mission to find out who framed them.
Starring Jeffrey Dean Morgan, the best thing about “Watchmen” not named “Jackie Earle Haley” or “Malin Akerman” (mmm), is Clay, the leader of this group of “Losers”. Based on a DC Vertigo comic of the same name, its full of guns, explosions, cool vehicles and betrayals, and seriously—it’s a hoot. I think all the actors, including Zoe Saldana(“Avatar” and “Star Trek”), know this movie isn’t to be taken too seriously, and in knowing that, they can really camp it up with not just the one-liners but even with the action sequences which are improbable, ridiculous and at the same time, just plain fun.
Two standouts in this movie make it worth a glance, one being Chris Evans, who played The Human Torch in another comic book adaptation, “Fantastic Four” and its sequel. He’s right on par with the snappy come-backs and comic relief. The main villain is Max, played by Jason Patric, who I can’t decide if he’s mailing it in completely or having the time of his life cause he’s got a job. Either way, Jason from “The Lost Boys” has come a long, long way.
You might remember the director of this film also directing the Oscar winning classic that rivals “Avatar” in its splendor and majesty, that being “Stomp the Yard”, and like his actors, he films in a classic comic book camp style. I’ve never read the original material, so I don’t have a reference point as to how true this film is to the graphic novel… but if you can catch it at the Ghetto Buck Theater, or pick it up on cable, do so. Its worth a 90 minute viewing.
“Kick A**”
Okay... so, for every reason I shouldn’t, I thought this movie was hilarious. Absolutely hilarious. Its title that I feel very uncomfortable saying (and don’t, especially on a website that I like to keep PG), its got the same language you’d find in equally as funny movies like “Superbad”, its got comic-book style violence that still produces blood spatter like crazy, and it’s got a bunch of teenagers trying to get some. There is no redeeming quality to this movie.
But still… man this was funny. Dave Lizewski is, like most protagonists of movies such as this, a dork. A nerd who has nerd friends and does nerd things. He decides that there is too much evil in his own hometown, so what better way to combat it than to make himself a “superhero” suit and become a superhero. Never mind that Dave has no skills of any kind, no athletic ability and really no fighting training of any sort. He just wings it, to sad and funny avail.
This amateur crime fighting doesn’t go down to well with two real superheroes in town, Big Daddy and Hit Girl. Big Daddy is played to the hilt by Nic Cage, who you’d think based on recent works, would be in this for the paycheck… not so, I would say, as Nic Cage is an avid comic book fan—this one really might be a labor of love. The controversy comes in with Hit Girl, who is Big Daddy’s daughter and is played by 11 year old Chloe Moretz… and who says some things in this movie that no 11 year old, nay nay, no 21 year old or anyone who keeps a clean mouth, should say. She doesn’t swear a lot, but when she does, its kinda uncomfortable.
Let’s skip that part, shall we? Anyway, Dave calls himself “Kick A**”, a… well, a stupid name for a superhero, but a name that… okay, well, it kicks… you know. Through the course of the movie, Dave figures out he’s in way, way over his head, when a crime boss comes after him. His son, Chris (a “don’t call me McLovin, even though all the characters I do now are like spin offs of McLovin Christopher Mintz-Plasse), fosters his own secret identity as Red Mist. Violence and hilarity ensues.
Anyway, I cannot in any way fathomable recommend this film. It is NOT Emmy Turnbow Safe, and sez Wiki: Australian Family Association spokesman John Morrissey, "the language [was] offensive and the values inappropriate – without the saving grace of the bloodless victory of traditional superheroes". In response to the controversy, Moretz stated in an interview, "If I ever uttered one word that I said in Kick-A**, I would be grounded for years! I'd be stuck in my room until I was 20! I would never in a million years say that. I'm an average, everyday girl.” Moretz has said that while filming, she could not bring herself to say the film's title out loud in interviews, instead calling it "the film" in public and "Kick-Butt" at home. Christopher Mintz-Plasse expressed surprise that people are angry about the language but do not seem to be offended by the many people killed by Hit-Girl.
Let's be clear here... this movie is NOT for children. As a Christ-Follower, this movie is a prime example of the topic of "what do you place in front of your eyes?", which is another conversation for another day. I've tried to give you the rundown on the film as best I can, so now its up to you as to whether to see it. Cindy Jo is probably not going to see this film. Hurricane Rhett might go out tonight and catch it.
“Date Night”
Okay... so, the Lovely Steph Leann and I were in Pensacola recently, and that evening, were desiring something to do. We had just had dinner at a restaurant called Hemingway’s Island Grill, and it was fantastic. The best calamari I’ve ever, ever eaten, and I’ve eaten lots and lots of calamari.
Anyway, we decided to catch a movie, one of our favorite things to do as a couple (I say that, and half the movies on this list I saw alone…). “Date Night” was one we had our eye on, and after shooting down “Letters to Juliet”, despite my slight affinity for Amanda Seyfried(is she pretty? Is she not? I dunno).
“Date Night” stars Steve Carell and Tina Fey as a married couple who love each other, but just need a night out, something special, away from the kids. They try to get into an exclusive uppity restaurant named Claw, and after being laughed at when they ask for a table, they sneak in and take someone else’s reservations (the idea of which becomes a running gag throughout the movie)… but when the bad guys arrive and think they are the people of who’s reservations they stole, things get crazy.
What follows is kinda formulaic, kind of been-there-done-that sort of plotline… but Carrell and Fey are awesome. Both are just plain looking enough to be believable as an average couple, but good looking enough, and likable enough, to root for. Throw in the fact that Mark Wahlberg shows up as a former client and former security agent, plus he’s not wearing a shirt, making for total comedy, and you’ve got a winner.
You know how there are movies that you can turn on, and just use for background noise, knowing that if you look up at any point, you’ll enjoy whatever you see because you kinda liked all of it. This would be “Date Night” for me when it comes on HBO in March of 2011.
I really, really enjoyed this film, and The Lovely Steph Leann laughed heartily all the way through. Its got some language, including one F-Bomb dropped at the expense of Mark Wahlberg not putting a shirt on, and the violence is cartoony and silly… catch this one on a matinee.
This was the story of Robin Hood before he became Robin of the Hood. Russell Crowe broods through this film like he does most films, and Cate Blanchett, so ravishing and Sydney Ellen Wade-esque in “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button”, merely passes as Maid Marian. It was rather enjoyable to see LOST’s Martin Keamy and his creepy yet wildly fascinating grin as Little John, though, and in the credits playing “Will Scarlett”, I saw the name of none other than “Critters” and “Critters 2” star Scott Grimes. Looking at his iMDb page, the not often recognized Grimes has made quite a career for himself in bit parts and television appearances, even getting a recurring role in ER.
Neither The Lovely Steph Leann or I loved it, but she liked it more than me I think. Of course, she digs any story that takes place in old England where dudes are wearing chain mail and carrying big swords, while the chicks are in frilly, frumpy dresses and do things like wash clothes in a basin. Not saying she wants to live there, but she loves that crap.
Best Robin Hood? Dunno… never seen the Sean Connery version, but I’d have to give it to Errol Flynn, the original, though Kevin Costner’s merits could be argued. Best Maid Marian? Would be a tough battle between Mary Elisabeth Mastrantonio, Audrey Hepburn (because she’s Audrey Hepburn) and that foxy one in the Disney version.
"The Book of Eli"
Okay... so what an amazing movie... the only thing I knew about this going in was Denzel Washington was a man protecting the last Bible on Earth. And the setting was some sort of a apocalyptic, everything-as-we-know-it-has-been-destroyed, cars burned up by the side of the road and rotting kind of civilization.
Denzel is Eli, a drifter who is following a vision to go to the coast, taking with him the last copy of the Bible... all others have been destroyed. If it had been said what happened, I might have missed it, but this is a world now where books are scarce, grown people can no longer even read, and communities are many times held under rule by whoever has the most power. Sex is a bartering tool, and violence is the answer for most conflicts.
We see right away that Eli is not a guy to be messed with... he's got somewhere to be, and he's headed that way. And when people try to stop him, he stops them from trying to stop him in the most convincing "don't bother me" way possible. Trouble comes when he drifts through a town and its discovered by the town's "ruler", Carnagie (played by Gary Oldman, who excels in this type of role), that Eli is carrying with him last copy of the Bible.
Carnagie then determines that he must have this Bible... not because its a collectors item, not because he is a Bible scholar... but because he declares it "a weapon, and civilizations have been built on this book." That is... well, refreshing. I'm sure the producers of the film didn't intend on making a religious statement, but they did. The world sees the Word of God as a work of fiction, but this movie hits it dead on--its a weapon. A holy, righteous, hope filled, Christ inspired weapon used to tell the stories of our Creator and guide those wo follow Hiim.
Denzel Washington, a Christ follower himself, is fantastic in this movie, and like Robert Downey Jr being irreplaceable as Iron Man, so to is Washington in this film... you take him, out, the movie falls apart. The supporting cast, though perhaps not irreplaceable, it still strong, including Oldman, Mila Kunas and Jennifer Beals.
Unfortunately, it doesn't take much to see the ending coming, with the final twist. Most people I know predicted the little surprise in the last few minutes, but that doesn't make the journey there any less entertaining.
The film is bleak in color, as many of the movies with this setting are, and language pervades throughout. The sexual moments are very few, with only a couple of allusions to it, mostly within the context of the town's danger. Violence is also heavy in this film, so expect lots of knives and gunshots and big armored vehicles. All that is to say that this movie is NOT for kids. I dare say its not Emmy Turnbow safe, but at the same time, I think Emmy Turnbow would like this movie--at least, an edited version that might come on the USA Network in June of 2012 or something.
My third favorite film of the year, following "How to Train Your Dragon" and "Iron Man 2".
Another take on this movie can be found here, by Chandler Wallace, a staff member at Valleydale Church (an sbc fellowship)... he also liked the film immensely.
Tomorrow... reviews on "Crazy Heart" with Jeff Bridges, "Orphan" with Vera Farmiga and a few older films that I've re-watched... including... "Money Train"...
You know, if you're in a Starbucks, be aware of your surroundings.
Case in point... yesterday afternoon, we were busy. It's getting colder, Christmas time is in the air, and more and more people are coming to Starbucks... here's why:
Maintenance. When its hot, and you want refreshment, you come to Starbucks for a frappuccino. Or Brusters for ice cream. Or Smoothie Planet/Tropical/King for a smoothie. Or Sonic for a Sonic Blast. Or Dairy Queen for a Blizzard. A ton of choices, which is why most sales go down during the hotter months.
But when its cold, where do you for hot chocolate, lattes or something to keep you warm? Starbucks. Oh, I'm sure there are other places to go as well, but Starbucks is one of the best places to go.
So, we're busy... three of us on the floor, I'm running the front register, but I need to hope over to help out in Drive Thru, because four cars just pulled in at the same time. I figure I'm just going to get these next two customers at the register and then I'll jump over to DT and save the day.
"Is that peppermint mocha good?" asks the old lady at the register.
"Its really good. I hope you like peppermint, though, because it is... well, pepperminty," I replied with a smile.
"Well, then I'll take one of them in a grande size. And give me one of them pumpkin breads out of the food case here," she asks.
"Alright, thats a grande peppermint mocha and a piece of pumpkin loaf," I said, "and that will be [ringing up] $5.91"
"5.91?? Why is it $5.91??" she stammered.
"Well, it's $3.48 for the peppermint mocha and $1.95 for the pumpkin loaf, plus tax," I replied, getting a little anxious. In the background, there's a woman and her son. The woman is picking up mug after mug after mug. Her son is picking up the stuffed bears, "Bearista Bears" they call them, out of the basket and piling them on a table.
"Well, I'll just take care of it then," she said, opening up her billfold. When she opens up the pocket, I see the glisten of coins. Lots of coins. Being with this company for five years, I knew what was coming next... I cringed as she said, "I'm just going to get rid of some of this change here."
She began to count out five dollars and ninety-one cents in various coinage pieces. Meanwhile, Kelly is in the drive thru getting killed. And the bar person is going to down in flames.
Finally she gets all of her change out, and I snap it up, handing her the pumpkin loaf and smling as I let her know her drink will be ready in a moment. Immediately, the lady behind her hands me a tumbler. "Here, hold this. Your a man, you can tell me how it feels," she says as she quickly turns back to the wall shelves to grab another.
The kid's bear pile is becoming quite high by now, nay, almost admirable. The beep is a constant sound in the headset in my ear, signifying another car, then another car, then another car in the drive thru.
The lady comes back to the counter with three tumblers. "What do you think?" she asked.
"Well," I answered, looking at the fat tumbler in my hand, "I like this one, but my issue with is that it won't fit into a car cupholder, so it depends on what he'll be using it for."
"Yeah, you're right," she says, standing there with four cups, looking at each. Remember, all of this has happened in the span of about five minutes, where I could normally shoot through about twelve customers or more.
I smiled, nod towards the pyramid of stuffed bears, and said, "Your son is quite the architect there." She looked over, sighed, and said, "Put those back." Her son obeyed, and put... two back. She grabbed on, grabbed a small stuffed penguin, piled them on the counter and said, "I'll take these."
I rang up all four tumblers, a small stuffed penguin and the Bearista Christmas Bear. "That'll be $74.03," I said, running the credit card she handed me. I bagged everything up, handed her the bags, thanked her and she was on her way. And just like that, the rush was over.
Now, what have we learned?
When you come into a Starbucks, its okay to take your time. It's okay to be in a hurry. We have customers in both catagories. But, be aware. Life does not revolve around you. You are given our full attention for a very brief time, so when you get that attention, don't take it for granted. Cause, there are lots of other people around who also want our full attention.
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I get to go give blood this morning. My buddy Ryan, and my buddy Rad-a-Tad too, works for the Red Cross, and anytime they have a big event, I try to go give. Lifetime, I've given two gallons and three pints, so I'm working towards three gallons lifetime.
Everyone has their blood donating horror stories... the first time I gave, it was in the Samson High School gym. We had blood races, with the guys pumping their fists on that hard plastic tube to make it flow faster. I never finished higher than 2nd.
My veins are pretty big. Nurses see them, they start drooling, then stand on the other side of the room and toss the needles in my arm. My worst experience? Well, two...
1) I was giving at Troy State, upstairs in the Adams Center student building. The line was really long, and I was running late for my freshman journalism 101 class, so as soon as I was done, I grabbed a rice krispy treat and ran... yes, ran... out the door.
For those of you who know Troy State, this is not a good thing. I dash down the stairs, out the Adams Center back doors, and then up the hill leading to Wallace Hall. Then, I run down the hill to the Wallace doors, then up three flights of stairs. I dashed into class at the last second, and sat down behind Miranda. Then the fact I just lost a pint of blood hit me.
"Whoa..." I whoozed. Miranda turned around, looked at me funny, and said, "You don't look so good."
2) I was giving on one of those mobile blood RVs, and the nurse had stuck the needle in. When she did, a little blood spurted out and got on the sleeve of my white shirt. "Oh dear," the nurse said, grabbing a little cloth. Then she started rubbing the blood spot on my sleeve, but as she did, her hand kept knocking the needle protruding from my arm. As it moved back and forth, stuck in my arm, it kinda hurt. "Um... uh, don't worry about the blood on my..." I stammered.
Not paying attention, she was talking to some other nurse, all the while, actually moving a needle that was sticking out of my veins. Not good times. Bad times, bad times.
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Sitting here watching "While You Were Sleeping", one of my favorite films. Yes, it will appear in the Dave100 somewhere along the way, once I get to it. And no, I haven't forgotten about the Dave100. Its a list that will make its way over the next few months.
Anyway, my little sister and I watched "Speed" the other night. We actually watched "Muriel's Wedding", which I was hoping I would like, and I did, but before either of us could move, or I could kick her out, "Speed" came on, and we were sucked in. We had a discussion about Sandra Bullock, who had her big breakout in this movie. Remember when both she and Meg Ryan were the absolute cutest things in the entire world? Back in the early 90s?
Well, "While You Were Sleeping" came on, and it reminded me of just how much I used to like Sandra Bullock. She has a Sydney Ellen Wade performance here, because there's not one time in the movie she doesn't look absolutely gorgeous. I had a friend in college named Jennifer Davis who smiled like Sandra Bullock. I think thats why Jennifer Davis was so hot.
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Speaking of hot chicks, I read in Entertainment Weekly that there's another sequel to "Gone With the Wind". The book, not the movie, but the book is coming. Anyway, the literary sequel is called "Rhett Butler's People", written by Donald McCaig.
I only mention this because they actually are planning a movie version. Apparently, in a poll, The Goddess is the most popular choice to play Scarlett O'Hara, narrowly edging out Rachel McAdams.
Now I have an issue... would I have to watch this movie? I mean, its associated with Gone With the Wind, which is normally something I don't associate with. But, I'll watch anything Ashley Judd in it. I mean, she's Ashley Judd. She's The Goddess. And she's been in some terrible, terrible movies. This might not be any different.
I guess Ashley is to me what Colin Firth is to The Lovely Steph Leann. Colin is president of the "Guys That Steph Wouldn't Leave Me For, but Would Hesitate Before Saying No" Club (who boasts members like Bradley Whitford and Patrick Dempsey). I guess Ashley is my own president, over members like Debra Messing and Kate Winslet.
Of course, none are Steph Leann. And like I tell Steph.... "I'm with you, not Ashley Judd, so what does that tell you?"
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Just got a message from my friend Tiffany Abbott (McCauley, or something like that, who knows), who was to Troy what Julie Wise was to high school. She tells me of the bathroom conditions at the Georgia/Troy game, which Georgia won... by only ten points, mind you.:
Georgia is in such a drought that they basically had signs posted at the football game bathrooms to the effect of "if it's yellow, let it mellow. If it's brown, flush it down." There were employed restroom attendants whose job is was to do the flushing.
I laughed hard. Talk about your potty humor.
Can you believe that after knowing Tiffany Formerly Abbott for twelve years, this is really the only picture I have? So, I figured I would post it just for comedic effect.
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And finally, if you're in Tuscaloosa and you want some BBQ, don't go to Dreamland. Go to Archibalds. I was helping train new Starbuckians for the new store in T'town last week, and decided to visit my brother-in-law Tyler on campus, and his roomdawgs, Trey, Jonathan and Stephen. After killing time and watching two or three episodes of "Family Guy", we were hungry. I suggested Archibalds.
I don't know where I'd heard it, but I had heard it was really, really good. It was later I realized that I had seen it on ESPN's College GameDay, where Todd Blackledge has a weekly segment where he visits local restaurants and such.
Anyway, after Tyler drove us around in circles for 30 minutes, we found it. It's this hole in the wall restaurant, where Archibald, this large, old black man, serves BBQ out of the pit that's actually in the wall. The building itself is really not bigger than a regular trailer.
Stephen, Jonathan, Trey, Archibald, myself and Tyler. Oh, Archibald is the big black man in the middle.
But the food was cheap. And FANTASTIC. For just over 8 bucks, I got a big plate with four ribs and a BBQ pork sandwich, and a 20 ounce Mountain Dew. None of us, not me, nor Stephen, nor Jonathan, nor Tyler, nor Trey said much as we chomped our food.
Seems the place has been around for at least 47 years, when he took over for his daddy. He laughed heartily, and seemed to enjoy the fact we were a bunch of young bucks--even me--eating in his restaurant. A good time was had by all.
It's been a movie kinda weekend for me... you know, where somehow the planets align, the stars twinkle just right, the time falls where it may, and you get the chance to watch several movies you've been wanting to see, all in a few days...
Friday Night -- "Ocean's Thirteen" Loved "Ocean's Eleven". Thought it was clever, at the time it was original, and its funny. And its one of the few movies that I can totally recommend the commentary on the DVD (Pretty boy or not, Brad Pitt is a really funny guy)
"Ocean's Twelve" was different. I walked out disappointed. Didn't watch it again until it came on HBO a year later, then I gave it another shot... and liked it. Then I saw it again a few days later... and really liked it. It grew on me quickly, and though I don't consider it on par with the first, I can watch it and not be disappointed now. So, "Oceans Thirteen" is out, and I wasn't sure what to expect. Reviews were really good, so I hoped it would live up... and it did. The gang is back, out to avenge the injuries suffered by Reuben at the hands of Willy Banks (a smarmy good Al Pacino). I won't go into detail about the plans, but know that Linus (a great Matt Damon) gets a main part this time, Turk & Virgil lead a workers strike in Mexico, Basher channels his inner Apollo Creed mixed with Evel Kneviel, someone cries over Oprah, you feel great sympathy for That Guy Hall of Famer David Paymer, and both Bruiser and Toulour make appearances, as does Terry Benedict. What happened to Tess? You find that out too. And only because I had a huge crush on her in 1989, I'm taking Ellen Barkin over a combined Catherine Zeta-Jones and Julia Roberts (For, like, two months, "Sea of Love" was my favorite movie of all time in 1989).
Like Twelve, Thirteen is like one big inside joke, but unlike Twelve, Thirteen lets you in on the joke so you can laugh too. And like Eleven, you may not laugh all the way through Thirteen, but you'll find your self amused the whole time.
Saturday -- "Knocked Up" If you didn't liked "The 40 Year Old Virgin", then you won't like this. Directed by the same guy, Judd Apatow, it has a lot of the same people, including Paul Rudd and Leslie Mann, and Seth Rogan is promoted to leading man. Steve Carell even makes a cameo.
Hotness Katherine Heigl is an up and coming E! news reporter who, while hanging out with her sister, gets a little too drunk. She has a foolish one night stand with Ben, a guy that it would take a very drunk hot chick to be with, and kicks him out the next day. Eight weeks later, she discovers she's going to have a baby. Ben's baby.
So the movie progresses as Alison and Ben try to make a relationship work, at first just for the baby, and then after finding out they really do like each other, for each other. This movie is rude, crude, lots of F-bombs, a couple of boobage scenes (though only one is real, the others are the guys watching boobage on tv, which is part of Ben's job. You'll find out why when you see it) and is actually lots of fun. Several things I liked about this movie...
Paul Rudd. This guy is really funny. He's been in "Clueless" (which Steph Leann loves), "Wet Hot American Summer"(a highly underrated comedy), "Anchorman" and much more, and each time, he's fantastic.
Abortion was never really considered. It is mentioned as an option, but without explaining how she came to the decision, Alison decides to keep the baby, as if its the only thing she could do. I respect that.
Ben's buddies. Several no-names, including Jonah Hill, who was in "40 Year Old Virgin" and "Accepted", make up Ben's entourage, and its classic. If the Deuce Guys weren't Christ-followers, and were into weed and bongs, this might be them. I'd be Ben, of course, with the hot chick.
Ryan Seacrest. Hearing the "American Idol" host curse is just about the funniest thing in the movie.
Leslie Mann. Also in "Virgin", where has she been? Why am I just now discovering her?
The pop culture references. From Meg Ryan's boobage to Matthew Fox ("You know whats interesting about Matthew Fox? Nothing!") to a hilarious Steely Dan dis to various other movies and celebrities that are randomly dropped in, it sounds like the Deuce guys sitting around. Without the weed and bongs.
I recommend it only if you wanted to see it--its worth the laughs. But know what you are getting into.
Sidebar: Speaking of Paul Rudd, if you ever have the chance to rent or watch Neil LaBute's "Bash: Latter-Day Plays", do so. It premiered on Showtime in 2001, shot as it was being performed onstage. Three separate pieces, one each with Calista Flockhart (who knew she could do more than Ally McBeal?) and Ron Eldard, both engaging in violence in different ways. The jewel, however, is the middle one with Calista and Paul Rudd portraying a couple attending a wedding. The night drags on, with the girls hanging at the hotel, and the boys going out for a night on the town... and end up precipitating a vicious hate crime. Paul's story telling, and the evil in his character, is chilling. If ever I was to direct theater outside of church, I'd do this in a heartbeat. You can pick up a copy of the script online.
Monday -- "The 40 Year Old Virgin" I might have been one of nine people in the world who had not seen this movie, and I laughed all the way through it. If you don't like American Pie humor, this is not for you. I say American Pie, but the humor is not as directed at teenagers, as it is directed at the side of us that laughs at things we know we shouldn't laugh at.
Steve Carell, in his star making turn, plays Andy. Andy works at SmartTech, collects valuable toys and though 40, has never had sex. When his buddies Dave (Paul Rudd), Cal (Seth Rogan) and Jay (Romany Malco) discover this, they make it their mission to... well, make him not a virgin. One attempt includes a funny turn by Leslie Mann, but it, like others, fail miserably. Enter Trish (Catherine Keener, who we'll get to in a minute), who works across the street at the eBay store
Though very crude, with lots of F-bombs and lots of crude terms for various things, this is, at its heart, a sweet movie. And oh, its funny... I laughed for ten minutes when Dave used the phrase "Man-o-lantern". First, the fact he's a virgin is met with very little ridicule, which is great considering this world wants you to have as much sex as possible. Secondly, though morons they may be, his friends turn out to be pretty loyal in the end. And third, Catherine Keener.
I really liked this film, even better than "Knocked Up"... Seth Rogan was funnier here, and Katherine Heigl is no Catherine Keener, who delivers a Sydney Ellen Wade performance.
What can I say? I really like Cat's part in this movie. She sparkled.
Sidebar: "Sydney Ellen Wade Performance". Its time we had a term for this. Every so often, when watching a movie, there is a leading lady who just shines. I mean, maybe not just acting wise, like Charlize Theron in Monster, but perhaps a performance that just... glows. As in, she lights up every scene she's in. Charlize, who was devastatingly good in "Monster" does not, at any time, glow.
This might be subjective, but the epitome of this was Annette Bening in "The American President". Her character, Sydney Ellen Wade, made me love this movie. Annette never looked as good before, or since, that movie. She just... glowed. Lit up the screen with every step, every word. No, its not subjective... I'm right.
Now, I was tempted to call this rare phenomenon an "Audrey Hepburn Performance", but that was too broad a term--Audrey was in a class all by herself, so I use Sydney Ellen Wade to describe such a performance. Other Sydney Ellen Wade performances? Meg Ryan in "You've Got Mail" and Brittany Snow in "John Tucker Must Die" (I didn't say the movie had to be good... but she owns that flick). Oh yeah, and now Catherine Keener in "the 40 Year Old Virgin".
Tuesday -- "Breach" If you don't know the story, in early 2001, Robert Hanssen, a top dog in the upper crust of the FBI, was arrested and charged with treason. He had been selling US government and military secrets to the Soviets and Russians for the better part of 16 years. On the outside, he looked like a great family man and patriot, but the truth was he was a total jerkweed in every way. Wikipedia has his story here.
"Breach" is the film version of that story, starring Chris Cooper as Hanssen, and Ryan Phillippe as Eric O'Neill, a young FBI agent wannabe assigned to be Hanssen's aide, and to be undercover for the FBI to swipe Hanssen's palm pilot, copy documents and so on.
Based on a true story, and with the real O'Neill serving as film advisor, this is pretty close to how it went down, if I understand it correctly. This is not a film to watch when you are sleepy, but it is a great movie. It builds slowly, with the first 45 minutes showing you what a great guy Hanssen is, almost wanting you to play the part of all the people that knew him before the truth was known. After that, however, you begin to see how... well, evil Hanssen is. His actions and spying ended up putting dozens of US undercover agents in danger, including three who were executed in Russia as a direct result.
This picture of the real Robert Hanssen always creeped me out. Either he looks like too nice of a guy to do these things, or he looks like a child molester.
One thing the film does is portray Hanssen as a brilliant mind who spied not for the money, but for the game, because he felt unappreciated and underused by his own country. Gary Cole (whom I feel bad for, because no matter what he does, he'll always be Lumbergh), President Palmer and an always fantastic Laura Linney(one of my top ten favorite actors... though I can't decide if she's pretty in a Jennifer Herndon sort of way, or just pretty...) are supporting roles, while Chris Cooper is awesome, and Ryan Phillippe makes me believe in his character, something I'm not sure he's ever done. Well, except for maybe in "Antitrust".
Sidebar: If you get the dvd, make sure to watch the "Dateline" segment in the special features. It originally aired in 2001, right after Hanssen had been arrested, and Chris Hanson is the host. He's got huge hair, and the segment is grainy (what, NBC didn't preserve its film six years ago?), but you still expect Robert Hanssen to be sitting at the counter eating cookies, with Chris Hansen appearing, asking him to sit down. "Um... I didn't know they were Russians, sir"... "I know you knew they were Russians--I've got the documents right here. What are you doing??"
Tuesday -- "Ghost Rider" By the time "Breach" was over, my mind was wiped out. Tense, taut political thriller, I needed something light and campy. Enter "Ghost Rider".
Based on the Marvel comic, "Ghost Rider" tells the story of Johnny Blaze, who sells his soul to the devil to save his father. Well, the devil's son is loose and trying to take over, and so the devil will let Johnny Blaze out his contract if he'll take on the son and... does it matter?
The skull guy was Nic Cage's original costar in Face/Off, but he dropped out and was replace by Travolta weeks before shooting. Somewhere, at least one of three Lattas is laughing.
Lots of cartoony violence, a skull on fire riding a chopper on fire, Nic Cage at his "I've got my Oscar, I don't care anymore" best (see: "Capt. Crap's Mandolin", "Lord of War", "The Wicker/Weather/Family Man"), and... Sam Elliott. You cannot go wrong with any movie that has Sam Elliott in it, especially if he's narrating. When they make the movie of my life, I want Sam doing the intro.
It's hard for me to root for an ingenue that I don't find attractive (which is why I avoid Angelina Jolie movies... well, that and most of them suck), so it was hard to root for Nic Cage and Eva Mendes to get together... beyond that, however, I found "Ghost Rider" to be fun, breezy, not too serious and likable. And that's important.
And hey... I'm off Wednesday and Thursday... who knows what I'll get watched by then...
Mark Ruffalo:
