Missed Idol Part II (Golden Ticket Parade)

On the road to catching up... for the final show of the audition episodes, its a recap of all stops along the way, including Dallas, Los Angeles, Atlanta and Orlando and more.   So, even though I know we'll have a few crappy ones along the way, hopefully when Ryan says "We're saving the best for last", that means we'll see several faces that will pop up during Hollywood Week.

THIS IS

AMERICAN

IDOL

Once again, recapping the episode from February 3rd, here's the summary...

**Its a recap of "Pants on the Ground", and how viral its become.  Heard the guy that wrote it finally lawyered up so he could get actually get paid--the song has been sung by everyone from Brett Favre to college kids doing a YouTube video.
**Posh Spice is back?  What the crap? 
**Jessica Furney, who auditioned last year in Denver, is back to make it--she didn't make it last time around.  She sounds really good this time around.  Don't know that I'll remember her, but she sounded good.  She makes it.
**"This is my dream!"  "This is my life!"  "I want to inspire people!"  Just thought you'd want to hear the statements that I'd never heard.  You heard it here first.

Commercial break

**Here's a chick who does voices, including this weird "talk with my mouth closed" thing.  Amanda Shectman has a pretty simple voice, and sounds pretty good.  With much tears, she comes out holding a golden ticket.
**Lee Dewyze is busting out one of my Top 25 favorite songs of all time, "Ain't No Sunshine", and doin' awesome.  He's through.  Crystal Bowerman does some Faith Hill and makes it.

Commercial break

**Here's a bunch of people who have auditioned multiple times... last year, four years running, five years running, one chick who has done it 7 times.
**Lacy Brown is just as cute as a button... made the Top 50 last year, lost out to Megan Joy, but is now back to audition again.  I vaguely remember her... she's doing "Over the Rainbow"... she makes it!

"Over the Rainbow" is one of those songs that you and I have always known, or at least known about, but never really listened to much once you got older... but once you finally do, you realize... this is a beautiful, beautfiul song.  Like, I'm totally not gay, but I'm totally into Judy Garland singing this song in "The Wizard of Oz" (as well as her version of "The Trolley Song" from "Meet Me in St. Louis"--both movies on The Dave100).  Here's "Over the Rainbow", and you can watch "The Trolley Song" below.  By the way, this was done in one single take.



Oh, and if you've never heard the late, big and great Israel Kamakawiwo'Ole do "Over the Rainbow", you owe yourself a listen to it... here's that video...



**Stephanie Fisher is doing "Fever", admitting that she has a crush on Posh Spice, and is rubbing her own legs while singing.  Weird.  She wasn't absolutely terrible, but she wasn't that great.  Simon says "Horrible", and then she tries to sing "Baby Love", and yeah, its horrible.  It comes out "Babah lah, my babah lah..."  Diana Ross is sticking a pencil in her eye at this very moment.
**Rachel Hubbard sings for the judges, including Joe Jonas, while Thaddeaus Johnson does the auditions with Doogie Howser.  Genesis Moore sings while Mary J looks on... all three make it through. 

Commercial break

**The 6'8 Adrian "The Big Kahuna" Chandtchi is about to audition.  We know from the teaser before the break that this won't be pretty.  He describes himself as a blossoming "man-flower", and we further know this will end badly.  I want The Lovely Steph Leann to be here to enjoy this with me.  He's going to sing disgrace "Can't Help Falling In Love".
**Big Mike Lynche, who is a personal trainer and is the size of Toni Rocki Honda, is sitting with his woman, and they are going to have themself a baby daughter soon.  Good for them.  He's busting up some "Unchained Melody", which is making Kristen Chenoweth giggle.
**Didi Benami is auditioning in memory of her best friend Rebecca, who passed away a few years back.  Cindy Jo is crying into her hashbrown casserole.  While the bizarre Avril Lavigne looks on, Didi does a jazzy version of "Hey Jude"... that's a song that I didn't care for much, but Didi's version is... well, this is the first time I have said this during any audition episode, but its good enough that I'd consider an iTunes purchase.  Loved that.

Commercial Break

**Oh, after these next few auditioners, stock in Kleenex went up about 45 cents per share due to the amount that Cindy Jo will be using.  Its the backstory montage.
**You got Aaron Kelly, who had family troubles when he was a child.  He sings "The Climb", and actually improves it and makes it bearable. Like Miley's version, I'm sure after a few spins, I'd be tired of that version too, but it was really good. 
**A very big heart and being really into recycling and helping kids in Africa.  That's what Kimberly Bishop says are good reasons to send her through.  She didn't make it.
**Shaddaii Harris has a cute little backstory that makes you think that you'll like her... she looks cute, her mom is supportive, she's got spunk... and as Doogie Howser finds out, she has a terrible, terrible voice. 

Commercial break

**And here's Hope Johnson, a Texas native, who grew up in poverty.  She was so poor, she didn't know she was poor.  She's take food home from her lunch tray at school to give to her brother for dinner.  So what does she sing?  "I Hope You Dance", a song that makes The Lovely Steph Leann just flutter and cry. 

I say that in jest--The Lovely Steph Leann abhorrs that song.  She cannot stand it.  I love me some Lee Ann Womack, especially "I May Hate Myself in the Morning", but I can handle "I Hope You Dance", whereas The Lovely Steph Leann throws up in her mouth a little when it comes on.

This year, 100,000 people showed up to audition, but only 181 have gotten The Golden Ticket to head to Hollywood.

Okay, from this episode I'll remember Didi Benami and Lacey Brown.  This adds to the list of names from previous posts that I remember, which are Seth Rollins... Jermaine Purifoy... Shelby Dressel... Matt Lawrence... Tasha Layton... Andrew Garcia... Todrick Hall... Lloyd Thomas... Maegan Wright... Erica Rhodes... Katie Stevens, That 16 Year Old Maddy chick, Ashley Rodriguez... Luke Sheffer... Mallorie Haley... Vanessa Wolfe... Jermaine Sellers...  Paige Dechausse... Angela Martin and Charity Vance. 

Feelin' Good... December's Christmas Playlist

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Thought since December had already started, I'd finally list the music on this months musical playlist... normally, I try to keep the list around 15, but its Christmas! That means a jumbo list of songs, all suited to keep you in the holiday spirit while you read The Clouds in My Coffee (and become a Coffee Drinker... it doesnt sign you up for anything, it only lets the world know that yes, you enjoy this blog!)

"Sleigh Ride" by Ella Fitzgerald. Is there a better way to start off a Christmas playlist that Ela Fitzgerald? This is one of my favorite Christmas tunes, and until I heard this one, Harry Connick Jr's version was the best... and then I discovered this Ella tune.

"All I Want for Christmas" by Vince Vance & the Valiants. This is truly my favorite Christmas song. Seriously. I don't know who Vince Vance is, I'm not sure who that actually is singing, and I've never heard of the Valiants--in fact, the rest of the album that I've heard is actually pretty terrible... but this countryfied, love-sick Christmas carol is just great.

"Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" by Judy Garland. The Lovely Steph Leann turned me on to "Meet Me In St. Louis", the musical starring the beautiful Ms. Garland. Its on my short list of movies that I really liked and just have to see again... I have a feeling a few viewings, and its probably going on The Dave100 2.0 in 2012.

Random trivia... Judy Garland refused to sing the original line, "Have yourself a merry little Christmas, it may be your last", as she regarded it as depressing and grim, and she was singing to Margaret O'Brien, then a child. She changed it, and the version she sings here is the one that everyone knows.

"Linus & Lucy" by Vince Guaraldi. You know this tune. You love this tune. This tune makes you happy, don't pretend that it doesn't.

"All I Want for Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey. Perhaps one of the most overplayed songs this time of year... and you know what? I stop the radio every single time it comes on. I love this song. It makes me happy. This is Pre-Skank Mariah in her best form.


Even with the 1990s hair, I'd take pre-skank Mariah over skank Mariah any day of the week. She just sang better... "Vision of Love", "Fantasy", "Dream Lover", "Can't Let Go", "Emotions"... nothing in the last few years that she's released has come close to her early brilliance--and for whatever reason, every song has to have a "feat. (fill in rap/hip hop artist here)" tag attached to it. Is this necessary? Factor 7 never had a "Dusinane feat. RZA" or a "It Is Well feat. Missy Elliot with The Lox and Ray-J". When your "feat" tag is twice as long as your song title, its bad news. Where was I?

"Please Come Home For Christmas" by The Eagles. This is a fun song to sing. The piano keys echo to begin, then Don Henley's rasp comes... "bells will be ringin'.... the sad, sad news..."

"The Christmas Song" by The Carpenters. This is one of two for The Lovely Steph Leann. My favorite version of this is from Hootie & the Blowfish, but I couldn't find their take on this classic on the playlist site I use. So, I went with The Carpenters.

"Grown Up Christmas List" by Amy Grant. Aw, this song makes me all warm and fuzzy and weepy. Well, not weepy, but warm and fuzzy. Amy Grant is awesome.

"You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch" by Sixpence None the Richer. There are several versions of this song out there, including the immortal Boris Karloff classic from the actual cartoon... but I liked the Sixpence. Leigh Nash's voice is just amazing.

"Feelin' Good" by Nina Simone. Technically this isn't a Christmas song, but every year, Starbucks comes out with a Holiday CD with a mixture of old, classic and new artists--Ella, Etta, Frank, Tony, along with Sarah McLachlan, Aimee Mann, Jack Johnson and the like. Well, one one entitled "Sleigh Full of Songs", I found this gem buried between Bing Crosby's "Little Drummer Boy" and The Great Satchmo's "Cool Yule" (that's Louis Armstrong, fyi). And from there, I discovered the joy that is Nina Simone. She's freakin' awesome.

"My Favorite Things" by Lorrie Morgan. Another song that has been done a thousand times... and aside from the original from The Sound of Music, this is my favorite take on this one. Lorrie Morgan is a country star with very little success nowadays, but back in the early 90s, when I assume this was recorded, she wasn't too bad.

"Christmas In Hollis" by Run DMC. Ah, anyone who has seen DieHard will recognize this. Its the song that Argyle the Limo Driver puts in when driving John McClane to the Nakatomi Building. "Don't you have any Christmas music?" asked McClane. "This IS Christmas music!" Argyle responds. Right he is.

"O Holy Night" by Rebecca St. James. While working at WTBF in Troy during Christmas of 1997, Word Records sent me this demo sampler CD from Rebecca St. James forthcoming Christmas album. It had a few different carols and hymns, but this is what stood out. Arguably, the definitive "O Holy Night" is Mahalia Jackson, and I won't argue there, but this is good too... its different.

"The River" by Sarah McLachlan. This one isn't too old, I don't think. Its from Sarah's Christmas CD "Wintersong", one of the 100 Coolest Things of 2007. Sweet. Sad. Lovely.

"Same Old Lang Syne" by Dan Fogelberg. The other song I threw on here just for The Lovely Steph Leann. The late Fogelberg reminded me of REO Speedwagon, STYX and Toto... great artist, especially at melancholy, sad ballads, but shouldn't every try to rock out. Fogelberg never really did, saving himself the laugh that is "Renegade" from STYX. Don't get me wrong, its a fun song, but "Renegade" is a silly song, not a rockin' song. Anyway, enjoy The Dan.

"Christmas Eve-Sarajevo" by The Tran-Siberian Orchestra. Another one I came across in 1997. I was blown away by it. I immediately played it for Doc Kirby, our program director, and he loved it too. We started tossing it into rotation. I played it for the WKMX program director then, and he didnt think it was all that great. "Not sure that will be very popular."

"Christmas in Dixie" by Alabama. For me, Alabama is the quinessential Alabama group. And as much as I hate "Sweet Home Alabama" by Skynyrd, I love "Christmas in Dixie". Perhaps its because I grew up on old school country (I vaguely remember when this song was brand spankin' new).

"Santa Baby" by Kylie Minogue. I cannot hear this song without thinking of Stephanie Rector. Deuce Christmas, 2000, I believe. Maybe 2001. Stephanie, in a purple sweater and red Santa hat, takes the microphone and begins to sing "Santa Baby". Mikey, her brother, looked on in horror as his younger sister reduced every other guy in the room to a puddle of mush at her feet. She swore she'd never do it again. Now married, that might be a good thing.

"Last Christmas" by Wham! Featuring George Michael. How can you have a Clouds in My Coffee Christmas without this tune? Most people aren't even sure when this song was done, who did it and where it came from--well, it was released as the B-side of the record "Everything She Wants" in 1984.

Back in the day, when singles were released for purchase and to radio (back before the words "digital" and "download" were used commonplace), the actual song that was to be released was on the A-Side. Now, because it was an actual record, with two sides, they had to put something on the other side, and usually it was a "throwaway" song, one that really had no hope of being popular... on the 84 record, "Last Christmas" was the B-Side.

And for you, My Clouds In My Coffee Drinkers... I give you the video, in all its horrendous glory, to Wham! feat. George Michael's song that will undoubtably last forever... "Last Christmas"



"Santa & His Old Lady" by Cheech & Chong. After the video, I'm not sure anything could top that. Well, maybe this hilarious little bit by Cheech & Chong, discussing Santa Claus and his magical night over Christmas. Don't worry, its a clean comedy bit.

My Girl McPhee vs. My Boy Taylor

Well, its late Tuesday night, and we've got six more songs to sing, two more performers to hear and one more show to watch... its time to see My Girl Katharine McPhee taking on Alabama's Own Taylor Hicks.

Here we go...

Tonight's show features both Kat & Taylor each singing three songs, two that they've already done before, and one specifically written for each of them... let me tell you, the songs written for them are bound to be really, really crappy. They always are. I mean, really bad. As an Idol, you gotta do it... but that doesnt mean it doesnt suck.

Live from the Kodak Theater, the same one that holds the Academy Awards every year... got a friend of mine that went to Los Angeles this week. She said she was looking for Idol tickets... I told her "Whatever. Good luck. Try eBay, get your $500 ready." And the Kodak is packed out as Ryan makes his entrance onto the stage.

Oh look, there's Ben Stiller, standing behind a Muslim lady.

We ge to see a review now of how Taylor and My Girl McPhee made it this far... lots of clips I remember seeing over the course of the Spring. Can't help it... even though I think Taylor is just great, I luvs me some Kat McPhee. I've still got the McPheever.

Song 1
My Girl McPhee is up first, and she's doing... ROCK ON--She's singing "Black Horse & the Cherry Tree" again. This time she's not on her knees, she's up and moving... I heard that last time, spending the entire performance bouncing on her knees, including practices, she ended up with black and blue spots all over her thighs and knees. I did like it better the last time, but it was still good tonight. Randy liked it better this time. Paula blows sunshine. Simon says "good with a small 'g'..."

So her numbers are 866 IDOLS 01, 03 and 05... meaning Taylor is 866 IDOLS 02, 04 and 06. Why not just say My Girl McPhee is 01 thru 04, and Taylor is 05 thur 08. Four lines each, none of this odd/even numbered thing.

Taylor is doing Stevie Wonder's "Living for the City", and he's apparently wearing Barney's skin. I mean, that jacket is PURPLE enough to come from Prince's closet. The song is fun too. Dancing around, getting the notes right, doing his thing that makes Taylor Hicks Taylor Hicks. And the crowd is going nuts...

Randy says, "You make it your own!" Paula blows sunshine, loudly. Simon says, sarcastically "This audience hated you... smart choice of song."

Oh look, there's Pickles with the short Steph Dollar hair (I miss Pickles), and she's sitting in front of Bucky... Bucky... and I think thats Melissa McGhee and Constantine? How did Gollum get back on the show? Oh, there's Lisa Turtle too!

Song 2
My Girl McPhee is going to sing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" again, a song that she did magnificantly a few weeks ago--which might be bad, because it was just a week or two ago, still fresh in the minds of everyone, so I hope she does well.

Her lipstick is too thick. And she just took out her ear monitor, for some reason. Other than that, I can close my eyes (not that I would--its My Girl McPhee) and see Judy Garland again. Thats a good, good thing. I like the fact she's not singing it exactly how you would remember it from "The Wizard of Oz", as in, she's putting her own twist on it, but she's not overdoing it. Its subdued, letting the song speak for itself.

Do I even sound like I know what I'm talking about? Or am I just being Paula and blowing sunshine?

Oh, and McPhather is crying his eyes out... again. Randy says "Yo, yo... you worked it out again--it was hot." Paula says "God given talent, flowers, birds, every girl proud, sunshine, fluffy". Simon says "Round 1, you got slaughtered. Now? I said it last week, but this time surpasses it--your best performance, so far."

My Girl McPhee explained her ear monitor didn't work... it gives her the key before she begins, and apparently, she had to guess--and she guessed right.

Taylor is singing Elton John's "Levon", which he says is his favorite song of the season. And kids, its pronounced "lee-vahn", NOT "leave on". Darn it, I hate reading message boards on EW.com or whereever, and see people writing "Leave on". Get it right, you uncultured igmo.

Oh, and the song... not one of my favorites from Elton John--I'd love to see Taylor do "Take Me to the Pilot", like George Huff did a few years ago. "Levon" is okay, though... Taylor did alright. A little less bouncy than the first, as expected.

Randy says "Nice song, but a little pitchy...". Paula says "Butterflies, cotton candy, tweeties, cupcakes". Simon says "Katharine has taken the second round. Its a level playing field now."

The Final Song
And now, here's My Girl McPhee's debut single, a song called... what? Oh, give me a break. Its called... "My Destiny". Why not just call it "The Cliche of Finding Success While Overcoming Insurmountable Odds" Either way, My Girl McPhee looks Phabulous. The song is not all that great, though... her voice is stellar, but the song itself is really a pooper.

Kind of a harsh note at the end there... they showed her mother on the verge of tears, though I honestly can't say if thas because she is so proud of her Katharine, or she's wretching at that note. Oh, look, they brought out the St. Francis of Xavier Choir.

Randy says "Three things, keeping it real. You look amazing. You sounded really good. I did not love the song." Paula says "Birds, puppies, kittens". Simon says "You went from brilliant to just 'quite good' in just one song. I would say to everyone that wants to vote for Katharine to remember the second song."

Randy chimes in... "the singer was better than the song." I totally agree.

Its now time for Taylor Hicks debut single, "Do I Make You Proud?" Or, "Do I Make You Dry Heave?" Just to clarify, these singles are what will be released for whoever wins the Idol Title. And for whatever reason, they are always, ALWAYS ballads. Is there no one working for the Idol Machine that can write an uptempo song? Heck, give me Taylor singing "Take Me to the Pilot", like I said before, or give me My Girl McPhee doing a version of "You Oughta Know" from Alanis (that would rooooock).

I like this song even less than liked Kat's song. I mean, Taylor sold it, sang his heart out for it... but the song was bleeech.

Randy says "This might be a slightly better song, but you make each song a Taylor Hicks song!" Paula says "Puppies, sunshine, flowers, duckies". Simon says "Assuming the show was tied before, you have just won American Idol". The crowd just went absolutely bonkers, including Mandy Moore in the audience.

Make no mistake... both My Girl McPhee and Taylor Hicks will have Ruben/Clay type success--as in, they'll both be hugely successful, each in their own areas. I would guess both will have longer careers than Ruben & Clay too. However, Taylor Hicks should win this competition. I loves me some Kat McPhee, I still harbor a crush on her, but Taylor should win this thing, because he's simply better.

And hey, here's Daniel Powter! He's singing "Bad Day", live on the show. Oh, the irony. Behind him, they are showing clips of the season, seeing the early auditions of Steph's Man Ace with the Ace Hair... there's Pickles again... Mandisa... Chicken Little.. and more.

You gotta think that Daniel Powter is trying to get every last bit of traction out of this song that he can... I see him going the way of Duncan Shiek... one song, plus a lifetime of albums that are critically acclaimed, yet sell, like, four dozen copies nationwide.

Alrighty.... tomorrow night, the Idol Finale. And I'll be here, covering it for you, doing my running diary during the show.