Okay, its been a week, and rather than post more movie reviews (seems all I've done is watch movies in the last two weeks...) I found this online and thought it entertaining. Let's face it, anytime someone is funnier than me, I don't mind talking about it--hence referrals to Hurricane Rhett and President Obama's policies. Of course, I want to keep you here, so that's why I chose to post the article on this page.
Its from a site called Topless Robot, which is full of pop culture and random lists of junk--making it, of course, right up my alley. Its concerning one of the greatest institutions of American childhood, that being "The Happy Meal" at McDonald's... and more importantly, the toy that comes in the Happy Meal.
I cleaned up the language, added the pictures and... The Top Ten Saddest Happy Meal Toys Ever.
The Happy Meal was introduced in 1979, the brainchild of an ad exec working for McDonalds and wanting to capitalize on the then-new success of the drive-through window. Early Happy Meals were pretty lame affairs, but they were only 99 cents too. And the toy wasn't actually that bad -- sure, they were just McDonaldland erasers: Ronald, Grimace, the Hamburglar, and the rest all done up sort of in M.U.S.C.L.E. style -- but that in itself is much more filled with awesomeness than the crap that Happy Meals would try to foist on kids later.
Over time, the idea grew into not just a kid-magnet, but a goldmine of cross-promotion--the first movie tie-in was with Star Trek: The Movie, and while the movie sort of tanked, the toys did pretty well. That led to a focus on more of the same, and once Disney bought in? Game over. The fact is that it's the tie-in stuff that mostly rocks -- when McDonalds was left to their own devices, the quality of the toys dipped dramatically, and so did the play value. (And as this list will show, even the tie-ins sometimes went wrong.) These, then, are the toys that kids complained about from the back seat.
10) THE PLASTIC GLOVE PUPPET
9) McDONALDLAND AIRPORT
8) CLONE WARS
7) E.T. POSTERS, ROUND TWO
Posters aren't necessarily bad things for kids prizes -- kids like to decorate their room with ridiculous crap just like the rest of us. But a poster that comes in a Happy Meal? Yeah, that sounds like trouble. First, it's going to come all folded up, and second, it's going to sit next to the fries and soak up grease. But all in all, not the worst prize--at least the first time around. See, McDonalds did this promotion twice -- first when E.T. was actually in theaters, which makes sense. And then again three years later, in 1985. When it made no sense at all. Unless you consider that McDonalds probably had a ton of leftover posters in a warehouse someplace.
6) MADAME ALEXANDER "OZ" DOLLS
5) HALLOWEEN PAILS
4) PLAY-DOH MINI PACKS
3) RONALD MCDONALD SUNGLASSES
needed a place to put his stash, and considered a stack of Happy Meal boxes kept right by the drive-through a good hiding place. (This is your brain on drugs, kids.) Of course, this inclusion to the McDonaldland mythoi does go a long way to explain the insatiable hunger of the Hamburglar, not to mention Grimace's very existence.
The original article can be found here.