Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Idol Inspiration

Okay, it was funny at first. But if I have to see Spongebob Nopants standing up in the bathtub, bubbles covering his giblets, I might kick a cement block barefoot. I’m just saying.

Alright, its… AMERICAL IDOL TIME! I haven’t done a complete review in several, several weeks, so I’m excited! It’s time for Idol Gives Back! And Sanjaya is nowhere to be seen! This could be a great night.

Basically, News Corp is going to offer 10 cents for the first 50,000,000 votes, which is $5 million bucks. And you know who's showing up tomorrow night? Bono. Yep, that Bono. I’ve heard it said that Bono is so cool, that if a guy makes out with Bono, you don’t call that guy gay… you ask him how cool it was.

Personally, I think U2 has kind of lost the edge (no, not The Edge, he’s still there… I mean the edge). They can put an album out of singing Waffle House menus, and it will go triple platinum, win four Grammys out of nine nominations, and Michael Nipp will buy it the second it comes out.

The money donated tonight through votes, and through people donating tomorrow night during the star-studded, two hour results show, will be going to fund charities in Africa, and here. And tonight’s themes are songs that inspire. Oh boy.

C-Rich is singing “Change the World” by Eric Clapton. This was featured in the underrated movie Phenomenon, starring John Travolta, and is found on the soundtrack to said movie… strangely enough, its one of my favorite CDs of all time. Jewel, Peter Gabriel, Aaron Neville, Clapton and several others sing some classics and its just a great rainy day album. And The Iguanas sing some Spanish song called "Para Donde Vas", which, ten years later, I still have no idea what it means, but it sounds cool.

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Here's a CD you should go out and buy, like, right now. Really. Go get it.

Oh yeah, Chris Richardson is singing. Its kinda nasally, though that’s him anyway. I don’t imagine Eric Clapton will be too scared that Chris will be taking his place. Randy loved it, Paula loved it (I’m proud of you, seeing your journey, here’s my room key). Simon liked it too. Really? I didn’t think it was all that great, but that’s why I’m tone-hard-of-hearing.

Conversely, the Cingular "dropped the call" ads are hysterical. I love the new one, where the guy is calling the girl back, talking about a connection... when the call drops and he can't hear her response, he says some stupid comment about, " know, like a brother and sister connection? Like, I would never make out with my sister...". The look on his face when he says this is priceless.

Mindy Doo is busting out some Faith Hill, a song called "There Will Come a Day". Its one I'm not too familiar with, me not being a big Faith Hill fan.

Songs that inspire me?
"Gonna Fly Now (Rocky's Theme)" by Bill Conti. How can you not be totally pumped up and excited about life after hearing this song? I mean, the push at the end just makes my blood race. If I can change, you can change, we all can change. Rocky ended the cold war with that line.

Randy used the word "so dope" when describing Mindy Doo. Paula loved her too (magical, no one like you, make sure Chris uses that key I gave him). Simon loved it because it wasn't a copycat, calling it a "vocal masterclass". Yeah, it was a great performance... but it was kinda boring.

"Welcome to Delaware" by Watermark inspires me. Its the theme song of my life, and cut #3 on the "The Original d$ Life Soundtrack".

Blake Lewis is up next. John Lennon's "Imagine" is on tap.. its a song I like, but not one I'm crazy about.

I love "Standing Outside the Fire" by Garth Brooks... the video is just superduper. Oh, and "Promise of a New Day" by Paula Abdul, but maybe thats just because this was 1991, when Paula was hot, and in the video she's in a small dress standing under a waterfall. Or maybe not.

Randy says "just aight for me, dude", while Paula liked it lots. Simon says it was sincere. I thought it was just okay... nothing tonight is just making me excited. Sigh.

You know what else inspires me? "Mama Said Knock You Out" by LL Cool J. No, seriously. Its a great song that just makes you clinch your fist and take on the world.

Another song that just lifts me up is "Healing" by Wynonna Judd and Michael English. It came right after English was pretty much ostracized from the Christian music scene after admitting to an affair, and was featured in the ridiculous movie "Silent Fall". Beautifully sung, powerful words, and you can tell that Michael English is truly living the words. You should click the link and buy it now... only one is available. Hurry!

LaKisha is singing "I Believe", by former Idol winner Fantasia? Wouldn't it be great if LaKisha had instead sung "Baby Mama"? How fantastic would that have been? "I chose 'Baby Mama', because as a single mother, I think its important to recognize all those bee-ay-bee-why em-ay-em-ay... this goes out to all my baby mamas, I got love for all my baby mamas." I would pay a little extra for that...

Randy liked it just okay, Paula tosses some sunshine LaKisha's way, though she stumbles all over her words. Simon didn't like it much either. For me, eh. Perhaps Jordin or Phil got some good stuff coming... I'm waiting for this Idol episode to be good.

Phil Stacey is ready to inspire me. And he's singing some Garth, "The Change". I miss Garth, I really do. He had one heck of a run in the 90s, didn't he? His take on "Calling Baton Rouge" is probably my favorite, but "Two of a Kind (working on a full house)", "Rodeo", his version of "Shameless", "Ain't Goin' Down til the Sun Comes Up", and tons more... great, great stuff. Heck, I don't even mind he shacked up with Trisha Yearwood... they make good music together, a la Johnny & June Carter.

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Here's another one you should own. Yes, this is the one that has "Friends in Low Places".

Oh, Phil's singing. And I'm bored to tears. Perhaps Jordin will bust out "Mama Said Knock You Out". I think I would actually get up and run around the apartment in joy if she did that.

Randy liked it, as did Paula. They both agree that country is Phil's forte. Simon really likes Phil, or so he says. "If you can connect with [style and country], you'll do well, because I think people like you."

Okay Jordin... give me something good to end this yawning show.

She's singing "You'll Never Walk Alone" by.... by... should I know this? Okay, Jordin. Blow me away. Wait for it... wait for it...

...wait for it...

...still waiting...

..and there she goes with the big vocals. She is truly your next American Idol. Randy says "one of the best vocals ever on six seasons of American Idol." Paula loved it. Simon says "fantastic". I'm pulling for her to take it home, all the way.

You know what else I like? "No Such Thing" by John Mayer. Yeah, really. Its a great song about life. Makes me happy. Even just the line "...I can't wait 'til my ten year reunion, I'm gonna bust down the double doors..." is worth it.

Course, I was just tossing out secular songs, with the exception of Watermark. I mean, add in Christian music, and the list of inspiring songs grows by a mile... "Faith My Eyes", "Close of Autumn", "Be My Glory", "Trinity", so on and so on... then again, you have to find that line between inspiring and encouraging and worshipful.

I'm not inspired by this show. Perhaps I'll toss on some Garth.
Note: Moments after finishing this review, I played "Calling Baton Rouge" three times on my iPod... then my internet crashed, I had to call Charter, stayed on the phone with the for about 30 minutes... and this was 130 in the morning. Good times, good times.)

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