Saturday, June 27, 2009

Not Emmy Turnbow Safe

First and foremost, I need to go on record and apologize to Emmy Turnbow. This is not an Emmy Turnbow safe film by any stretch of the imagination. Even if it was censored, toned down and edited for its broadcast on TNT in 2013 on a random Saturday afternoon, it still wouldn’t be Emmy Turnbow safe. In fact, in thinking about it, there isn’t a single moment of this film that could be considered Emmy Turnbow safe.

For those of you curious, Emmy Turnbow is the wonderfully wonderful wife of our Sunday Sch… er, Life Connection class at Valleydale Church (an sbc fellowship), and she’s one of the most Godly chicks I know. So, if she’s going to disapprove of something, or I’d feel bad knowing I led her to it, I called it Not Emmy Turnbow Safe. Its almost the same thing as NSFW (not safe for work).

So, consider “The Hangover” as not at all Emmy Turnbow Safe. That being said… holy crap, this movie was funny. I mean, really funny. I mean, like, seriously, really, really funny. Wrong in every sort of the word, totally crude, totally raunchy, totally put your face in your hands and wonder how long to wait before praying repentance that you, a Christ Follower, are finding this film as hysterical as you are. But its funny. So I'm not here to debate the merits of seeing such a movie while proclaiming the name of Jesus, I'm here to tell you I went, by myself, to see a movie that I thought would be funny, and it was.


Simple premise is, three guys take their buddy for a night stay in Vegas for a bachelor party… all three have distinctly different personalities, all three are played to the hilt, and all three react differently when they wake up in their now-trashed hotel room the next morning, a tiger in the bathroom, a baby in the closet, one guy missing a tooth and the groom completely disappeared. None of them can remember a thing about the night, but they start backtracking their steps to find out what happened, and why Mike Tyson ends up in their hotel room. And where the tiger came from. And why one of them is missing a tooth. And why there is a baby in the closet. And why... come to think of it, this sounds like The Lovely Steph Leann's bachelorette party.

All I can say is, if you take the cleverness of “The Wedding Crashers”, the silliness of “American Pie” and the sheer crudeness of “Superbad” and “Old School”, then toss them all in together, you’ll get a movie like “The Hangover.” Go into this expecting lots of F-bombs, lots of potty humor, Heather Graham breastfeeding and somewhere in there, a naked Asian man wielding a tire iron in a scene that make me cry because I was laughing so hard. If this is not your alley, then please, stay away. You’ve been warned. And the ending credits? Wrong. And funny. And wrong. And funny. You’ve been warned.

Emily Duncan Turnbow, you stay away. Don't even think about it.

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