How We Met

People often ask, “Where’d you and the Lovely Steph Leann meet?”. It’s a good question, and actually it’s a fun little story. I was thinking about it over the last few days, I wanted to give an accurate portrayal of how, in fact, we met.

I was in Common Ground at Valleydale Baptist Church, cleaning up, alone. She came in, stumbling around, and since I didn't know who she was, I thought it might be best if she left.

She did leave… and came back in, and was holding a candle, unlit. The following is a pretty close transcript of our first conversation, and thus, how we met…

ME: What'd you forget?

STEPHANIE: Got a light?

ME: I know you... you're... you're shivering

STEPHANIE: It's nothing they turned off my heat, and I'm just a little weak on my feet. Would you light my candle? What are you staring at?

ME: Nothing, your hair in the moonlight… You look familiar. Can you make it?

STEPHANIE: Just haven't eaten much today. At least the room stopped spinning. Anyway... What?

ME: Nothing, your smile reminded me of...

STEPHANIE: I always remind people of - who is she?

ME: She left. Her name was Amy Wible

STEPHANIE: It's out again. Sorry about your friend. Would you light my candle?

ME: Well…

STEPHANIE: Yeah. Ow!

ME: Oh, the wax - it's...

STEPHANIE: Dripping! I like it...

ME: I figured ... Oh, well. Goodnight. It blew out again?

STEPHANIE: No - I think that I dropped my stash

ME: I know I've seen you out and about, when I used to go out. Your candle's out

STEPHANIE: I'm illin' - I had it when I walked in the door. It was pure - is it on the floor?

ME: The floor?

She started crawling around looking for whatever it is she was looking for

STEPHANIE: They say I have the best eyes below Hwy 280. Is it true?

ME: What?

STEPHANIE: You're staring again.

ME: Oh no… I mean you do... have nice... I mean... you look familiar

STEPHANIE: Like your old girlfriend?

ME: Only when you smile. But I'm sure I've seen you somewhere else -

STEPHANIE: Do you go to the Purple Onion? That's where I work... I cook

ME: Yes! They used to make you chop paprika-

STEPHANIE: It's a living

ME: I didn't recognize you, without the spatula

STEPHANIE: We could light the candle. Oh, won't you light the candle?

ME: Why don't you forget that stuff, you look like you're 23

STEPHANIE: I'm 24 - but I'm old for my age. I'm just born to be bad

ME: I once was born to be bad. I used to shiver like that

STEPHANIE: I have no heat, I told you...

ME: I used to sweat...

STEPHANIE: I got a cold...

ME: Uh huh. I used to be a junkie...

STEPHANIE: But now and then I like to…

ME: Uh huh

STEPHANIE: …feel good

ME: Oh, here it - um...

STEPHANIE: What's that?

ME: Candy bar wrapper

STEPHANIE: We could light the candle. Oh, what'd you do with my candle?

ME: That was my last match

STEPHANIE: Our eyes'll adjust, thank God for the moon

ME: Maybe it's not the moon at all, I hear The Deuce has a party down the street

STEPHANIE: Bah humbug ... Bah humbug

ME: Cold hands

STEPHANIE: Yours too. Big, like my father's. Do you wanna dance?

ME: With you?

STEPHANIE: No - with my father

ME: I'm Dave

STEPHANIE: They call me… they call me Stephanieeeeeeee

And the rest, as they say, is history.

PS... some of you won't have a clue what I'm even talking about. but the ones who do are smiling.