the slimy book of disappointment

Being a big audiobook fan... dirty little secret, I listen to audiobooks just about all the time (when I'm not listening to podcasts)... I constantly check on the "coming soon" section of Audible, to find out hwen Stephen King's new book is coming out, or when one of my favorite actresses, Judy Greer's memoir is coming, or Adam Carolla's new book, or his podcast co-host Bald Bryan's cancer memoir (these are all four books I'm excited to read), and I usually add any books upcoming of particular interest to my wish list...

SIDEBAR... my wishlist on audio is absolutely ridiculous.  You'd think I'd have a major wishlist on Amazon or something, movie fan that I am, but no, not a single thing on Amazon.  On Audible I currently have 27 titles that I'd like to one day read... biographies on Jim Henson, and Anthony Rapp (from Rent and Adventures in Babysitting)... one of my favorite sports nonfiction books, "Rammer Jammer Yellow Hammer" by Warren St. John... Bob Goff's "Love Does"... "Double Down", the sequel to 2008's brilliant, election centered "GameChange" (which is also on my list to reread)... I need like, 30 credits right now. 

...anyway, that all is to say that, when I saw a book entitled "Slimed", I thought, "Hmm, that sounds like an interesting title."  Then, when I clicked on it, my interest turned to sheer joy when I saw the full, official title:  "SLIMED: An Oral History of Nickelodeon's Golden Age"

Matthew Klickstein, shame on you for taking such an awesome idea and
making it so poorly executed.

What?!

WHAT THE...?!

WHAT THE WHAT???!!!!

Immediately, I ordered it, and a few days later, it was released and I got it and jumped in immediately.  This was going to be awesome... I mean, I grew up in Nickelodeon's "Golden Age"... when shows like "You Can't Do That On Television" were all the rage--Mom didn't really like me watching it, my friends moms didn't like them watching it, so naturally, it was all we talked about at Ridgetop Elementary School.  It had adults smoking!  SMOKING!  On a kids show!  A sketch show, YCDTOT was from Canada, and featured many of the same characters from episode to episode, and when anyone uttered the phrase "I don't know", they got slimed--green slime dropped from the ceiling and poured all over the actor.  When they said "Water", it was then h2o that doused them.

And I loved it.  Other shows like "Hey Dude!" featuring a teenage, and so gorgeous to my 12 year old eyes, Christine Taylor... and "What Would You Do?" and kids game shows and dramas and a block of shows on Saturday night called "SNICK", featuring "Who's Afraid of the Dark", a horror anthology--for KIDS... and "Double Dare", hello! every kid's dream to run that obsticle course and get slimy by looking for a flag in a giant nose... and of course, "Ren & Stimpy", a show that my 15 year old silly self found so funny that I would cry sometimes from laughing so hard.

I was alone in my room, unpopular, not invited out, watching SNICK and then later listening to Open House Party with John Garabedian. 

Sigh.

I digress.

This was going to be fabulous... not only the history of Nick, but tales from behind the scenes, perhaps the fights, the Nick-sized scandals, how certain shows made it, how certain shows failed, and, of course, the infamous tale of how the creator of "Ren & Stimpy", far and away the most popular show in Nick's history at that time, was fired from his own show.

This was going to be a walk down my childhood, into adolescence.  And it was going to be wonderful, right?

The other part about this book that excited me were the words "oral history", as in, "oral narrative".  I first experienced this type of story telling when I read the excellent "Those Guys Have All the Fun: Inside the World of ESPN", the story of ESPN.  The authors didn't just tell the stories, they let those who were there tell the story... anecdotes from the likes of Chris Berman, Rich Eisen, Robin Roberts, Larry Bird, Magic Johnson, and so on and so on, all compiled together to make the narrative, telling the story of ESPN's beginnings, its history, its early years into its modern day.

Last year, I read "I Want My MTV", another oral narrative, with everyone from MTV VJ Alan Hunter to Jon Bon Jovi to Simon Le Bon from Duran Duran giving their take on MTV's history (more about this in my next post, my Top Ten faves of the year)

So, naturally, to not only hear Nickelodeon's story, if not complete, then at least its "golden age", from its beginning to maybe the mid-90s, told from the people there--Christine Taylor from "Hey Dude!" and maybe that kid from "Don't Just Sit There" and Marc Summers (who did the forward of the book, another selling point) and Alasdair and Lisa and Christine from "You Can't Do That On Television"--was going to be awesome.

So I dove in. 

And it sucked.

I mean, just completely sucked.

It breaks my heart to tell you this, but its a terrible book.  I mean, atrocious... it would be one thing if the book had Fabio on the cover, you would know going in that this likely would be, well, not good.  But this?   This entire idea, this entire concept was genius... there were millions of people like me who grew up on Nickelodeon, who would be excited to read the stories of their favorite childhood network... but no. No no no.

Two reason:

1) WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?? 
When reading books like "Those Guys Have All the Fun", you see a constant pattern... before you read the anecdote, it will tell you not only who they are, but WHO they are.  "Chris Berman, Anchor".  "Kenny Mayne, Anchor".  "Bill Simmons, writer, Grantland.com".  You get the idea.  In "I Want My MTV", there were things like "Joe Elliot, Def Lepperd" and "Downtown Julie Brown, MTV VJ" and so on... again, you get the idea.

Imagine my surprise when the first chapter, "The Tween: What It was Like Growing Up Nick" had the first name of "Christine Taylor".  No "Hey Dude", no "Actress", not even a "Ben Stiller's Wife" or "The Hot Chick in Dodgeball"... just her name.  Well, that's okay, I knew who she is.  But then?  "Danny Tamberelli".  Then "Elizabeth Hess".  Followed by "Judy Grafe".  Who?  Who?  And Who? 

No identifications.  No names.  No sources.  "Heidi Lucas" and then "Justin Cammy" and then "Trevor Eyster"... who are these people?  Not even a comment on what role they play--no "actor" or "producer" or "writer" or "best boy" or "gaffer" or "caterer to Harvey on Double Dare". 

Immediately, I was lost.  There is a huge reference in the back, with a few hundred names listed, who they were and where they are now... but to keep going back to it four times just to read a page is so tiring.

2) ITS ALL OVER THE PLACE
That Tween chapter I mentioned, the first one?  Not only do you not know who these people are, you don't even know who the 'tweens were.  Some were people who played adults on the shows, others were the kids, but you had no idea what their frame of reference was when they spoke. 

Secondly, it goes everywhere, from some drug use to filming to lines to school to crushes, then veers off in a completely different direction, before coming back again.  Other chapters are just like this... the one I was looking forward to, the split between Nick and the creator of "Ren & Stimpy" spent half the chapter on this, then part of the chapter somewhere else, not coming to any satisfying conclusion.

Halfway through it, I was beginning to question whether I should even stick it out... I did, begrudgingly.  And I'll never do it again.

The idea itself was brilliant.  The concept was exciting and fun, and stuck into that nostalgia that people like me have for the days when you came home from school and watched programs as they came on, because otherwise you'd miss them--no DVR or TiVo or at my house, no VCR to record it... you watched it then, because you couldn't watch it online or get the season from NetFlix or Best Buy... not in 1983. 

The disappointment.  The potential, and the huge letdown from the very beginning.  This is why "Slimed: An Oral History of Nickelodeon's Golden Age" was the worst book I read in 2013.  Matthew Klickstein--do another version, update it, and I guarantee I'll buy it again. 

(5484 words written for #15KWordsinFeb, 9516 words to go)

the 100 coolest things of 2011... 70 thru 41

Yes, its the 2nd of January.  That is 2013, I mean.  And yes, I'm still discussing 2011... but I feel like I can't very well discuss the coolest of 2012 without finishing up 2011... so, let's move quickly, and go through the 70th through 41st coolest things of 2011...

First, a recap...

The 100th to 91st Coolest Things of 2011... Auburn... The Spin Doctors... Friends with Benefits... The President of the Colin Firth Club Wins... "My Strange Addiction"... Edge retires... Fast Five... 50/50... The Aladdin Stage Show... Something Borrowed

The 90th to 81st Coolest Things of 2011... Coin Dozer... Superheroes... The Rainmaker... I Need a Dollar... Zookeeper... Mr. Toad's Wild Ride... The Help... Jersey Mike's... Thor... Brava Rotisserie Grill...

The 80th to 71st Coolest Things of 2011...  Transformers: Dark of the Moon... The Ides of March... The Mavs Win... Kent State... Sherlock Holmes: Game of Shadows... My Yard Goes Disney... The Civil Wars... Rise of the Planet of the Apes... Hot Coffee... Misery...

70... The Lion King Re-Released in 3D... Loved the movie when I saw it in the summer of 1993, loved the times I've seen it since... and watching in not only in 3D but also back in theaters was fantastic. 

69... Necessary Roughness... No, not the epic Scott Bakula movie, though I do love that one too.  This is a series on USA Network about a psychologist (Callie Thorne) who is hired to help out the athletes on a professional football team.  Its funny, its serious, its got great stories and great acting. 

68... Words with Friends... Another app that kills my time and distracts me from work.  And yes, I do get routinely beat by The Zach Attack, an 11 year old.

67... "Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides"... Perhaps I'm in the minority here, but like everyone, I'm a lover of the first one, and like most people, I didn't care for the 2nd and 3rd one--too long, too convoluted, too confusion... but this 4th one, with its straight story and new characters, I could dig. 

66... "X-Men: First Class"... Continuity be darned, this new entry into the X-Men franchise seems to be starting its own series of films.  James McAvoy as Professor X and Michael Fassbender as Erik Lensherr, aka Magneto, lead this ensemble cast which includes... Kevin Bacon.  Wait, what?  Great film, great climax.

65... "Captain America: The First Avenger"... What's not to like about this final film before "Marvel's The Avengers" took the world by storm this year? Chris Evans is a great Steve Rogers, the puny soldier who volunteered to become a super soldier, a Weapon I if you will... in comic book history, Wolverine is Weapon X.  And Hugo Weaving is a great bad guy, as The Red Skull.

64... American Idol... After Phillip Phillips blew me away this past season, I had to look to see who won in 2011, because I had already forgotten... it was Deep Voiced Scotty McCreery, who edged out America's Darlin' Lauren Alaina. 

63... Mark Lowery... He came to Valleydale Church (an sbc fellowship) in January of 2011.  And I remember laughing very hard at his humor and enjoying his music very much.  He's a Christian music legend.

62... "Horrible Bosses"... Not for the faint of heart, but it does have heart as it tells the story of three losers--Jason Batemen, Charlie Day and Jason Sudekis--who hate their bosses so much, they want to help each other kill the bosses.  Lots and lots and lots of language, plus a scantily clad Jennifer Aniston, but if you can deal with that, Jamie Foxx as MF Jones and Colin Farrel completely against type (and having a ton of fun, you can tell) make it worth the watch.

61... "Once Upon a Time"... This might be a little cheating, because I really didn't get into this show until 2012, but I did see a few episodes of it, and I loved it from the beginning.  Its the story of Storybrooke, where all the residents are actually real life story characters--Snow White, the Dwarfs, Cinderella, Pinocchio, etc--who are cursed to live in the real world.  Reminds me a little of the comic book "Fables".  Oh, and Ginnifer Goodwin.  Love her.

60... She and Him... What can I say?  I dig their tunes.

59... Magic, Memories & You... This is the show presented on Cinderella's Castle prior to the fireworks at Magic Kingdom every night.  Using this advanced light technology, a constant stream of color and light and wonder flash onto every part of the castle, giving the impression that the turrets and columns are spinning or disappearing or on fire or flying or whatever... you know what, just watch this:




58... "The King's Speech"... Starring the president of The Lovely Steph Leann's fabled Colin Firth Club, here's the story of King George VI, his horrible stutter, an amazingly understated Geoffrey Rush as his speech therapist.

Set in 1939, Prince Albert (who becomes George VI), has what he thinks is an incurable stutter, which only hinders his leadership and future under his ailing father, King George V.  Albert's wife Elizabeth, persuades him to go visit Lionel Logue, an Australian speech therapist who is in London at the time.

Of course, they don't get along, at least at first, and added to Albert's pressures and woes is the antics of his older brother David (Guy Pearce, in one of the only flaws in the film, because he does not look older than Colin Firth) who is heir apparent to the crown, until he goofs it up... and its the speech he must give, addressing the people of London in a time of impending war that the title of the movie refers to.

"The King's Speech" is a magnificent movie all around, with all performances being stellar.  Helena Bonham Carter is especially subdued as Elizabeth, a break from her normally frantic and weird acting, while both Rush and Firth have wonderful chemistry in their lead roles.  It is Rated R, but its pretty much solely for language--there is a scene where Lionel tells Albert to use profanity to help his stutter, and he does, repeatedly, in a string of words that include several F-Bombs.  But in a world where crap like "Salt" can be PG-13, despite language and violence, then this should never be an R.  I'll be proud for Campbell Isaiah to see this movie when he's 12 or 13.

57... Outtakes... I was going to tell you about their awesome chicken salad, but not too long ago, The Lovely Steph Leann and I went there for lunch.  And they were closed.  As in, closed down.  So, never mind.

56... Catching Hell... One of the best documentaries I've ever, ever seen, and so far, by far, my favorite of the ESPN 30 for 30 series.  Directed by Alex Gibney, it takes the 2003 story of Steve Bartman... do you remember Bartman?

Eighth inning, Game 6 of the National League Championship Series, the Chicago Cubs are but a few outs away from their first World Series in over 100 years, they lead the Florida Marlins 3-0, their ace pitcher is rocking the hizzy, and the mojo was on their side.  And then, a pop fly into the stands, as Moises Alou goes to get a very catchable ball and suddenly... fan Steve Bartman reaches out for it.  The ball bobbles, Alou misses it, it falls into the grass, and the Marlins score.

The  guy in the Cubs hat

And suddenly, all hell breaks loose.  And the Cubbies, who were sooooo close... blew it.  And then they blew Game 7.  And the fans, instead of raging against the Cubs for blowing Game 6 and then screwing up Game 7 (and watching the Marlins, a franchise less than a decade old, win its 2nd World Series), they turned all their attention towards Bartman, who suddenly became a scapegoat for all the teams ills and shortcomings.  Death threats to him and his family, public shaming, humiliation all for a fan who reached out for a ball that a dozen other fans were reaching for--and had the fortune of not getting.

The film explores that night and such topics as... was the pitcher really clutch?  was the team's mojo really rolling?  and was that ball really catchable?  It also makes a great parallel to Bill Buckner, the Red Sox first baseman who's error in letting a ball slip past him, and in turn costing the Red Sox the game--and eventually leading them to blow the series vs the Mets, as it explores the whole concept of "scapegoating".

Using never before seen footage from inside the stadium during Game 6 of the Cubs/Marlins series, interviews with everyone from Moises Alou to nearby fans who didn't catch the ball, this film is captivating, and in a way, heartbreaking, as you see Steve Bartman sit solemnly at what has happened.

Its also a great study in human nature, as that night, guards had to escort him out of the stadium, and one even took him to her home for a few hours after the game to keep him safe.  Brilliant film.

55... The Winnie the Pooh Soundtrack... Yes, I loved the movie.  I love it more every time I watch it.  And the soundtrack is just as good... with vocals from Zooey Deschanel, plus a few Disney classic voices, its perfect for a peaceful drive or a happy afternoon.

54... Survivor... the show gets better and better every year. 

53... Shazaam... What's that song?  Who sings that tune in that commercial?  What's that music playing overhead?  Just plull up your Shazaam app, press the button and it will tell you its Edward Sharpe & the Zeroes... or its Colbie Caillet... or its some other tune that you will have to immediately buy in iTunes...

52... Moneyball... I do love this movie.  Its very close to making its way onto the famous The Dave100, a collection of my 100 favorite films of all time... Brad Pitt plays Billy Beane, a former baseball superstar in high school who can't cut it in the majors and ends up being a general manager at Oakland, where he using a new system to put together a competitive team.  Pitt is like usual, that is, great, and Jonah Hill gives a strong supporting performance, based on the brilliant book by Michael Lewis (a book that will appear on the Coolest Things of 2012)

51... "Bridesmaids"... Hilarious.  Completely hilarious.  Kristen Wiig is great in the lead as Annie, who is watching her best friend Lillian (Maya Rudolph) get married, and is all set to be the maid of honor... and is now battling Lillian's other friend Helen for the attention.  And thus the comedy ensues.  Supporting cast wins, including Jon Hamm as a complete d-bag, Chris O'Dowd as Annie's possible love interest, and Melissa McCarthy stealing the show (and earning an Supporting Role Oscar nod) as another bridesmaid.  The scene in the dress shop, after the Annie-led luncheon, is priceless.

This movie does bring up a problem though... there are some movies I enjoy immensely--like this one, ranking as high as it does on this list... but in subsequent viewings, it loses some magic.  Don't ask me why, or how.  I haven't seen it all the way through since this initial viewing.  Hmm.

50/49... Lil Sister Ashley Gets Married & The Good Reverend Ty Sharpton Coffey Gets Married... One was in the middle of Mississippi, one was all the way across Mississippi.  Both got married to their own soulmates, and I'm happy for both, and it was an honor to see both ceremonies.

48... Lunch with an Imagineer... For a fee, you can eat a fantastic lunch with a Cast Member at Walt Disney World... but not just any Cast Member, an actual Imagineer, someone who develops, plans, and does the behind-the-scenes work at the parks.  And The Lovely Steph Leann and I did just that in February of 2011, sitting with a dude who works at Hollywood Studios, and dining at The Brown Derby, which had me eating the best salad I've ever had in my life... the steak wasn't bad either.  Oh, and we sat right beside the guy, with a group of another 8 or so people, peppering him with questions like "Why is Stitch's Great Escape still around?" and "Is Disney going to answer Harry Potter?" and "Why is the big hat still up at Hollywood?" and "What other pavilions were planned for Epcot?".  Good times.

47... Super 8... Just an all around great movie, that, like "Bridesmaids", I found it not as enjoyable to watch the 2nd go round.  Read the full review here.

46...Cirque de Soleil: La Nouba... Got to watch this incredible show in Orlando on our Disney trip.  Would have been better had I not been feeling so rotten.  The little chicks with the spinning spools were the best.

45... "Brighter Than the Sun" by Colbie Caillet... 2011 was the year that you couldn't get away from this song... most movie trailers and a ton of commercials had it... "oooooh... this is how it starts... lightning strikes the heart..."  Good thing the song was so catchy and fun.

44... Osama bin Laden Caught... Yes, Obama was the president while bin Laden was captured.  Using Dubya's policies.  Go figure.  U-S-A!  U-S-A!

43... Beavis and Butthead... They made their return.  And it was darn funny.  And I miss them again.

42... "Cujo" by Stephen King... How can you take a story that has a mom and kid trapped in a car, being terrorized by a rabid dog into over 300 pages?  Stephen King can do it.  And its awesome.  Cujo, now a word used in our lexicon to mean a big, fierce creature, is a dog bitten by a bat and goes on a rampage.  And its scary.  And thrilling.  And awesome.

41... "Courageous"... What a great movie.  What a great, great movie about fatherhood, God's love and friendship.  The Kendrick Brothers, out of Georgia, have done a series of films, all unrelated in story except for God being an integral part of the story, and you can see the progression of their talents from early ("Facing the Giants") to this film.  Its a simple story of a group of officers in Georgia, plus a Hispanic day laborer, all with incredible faith that is tested severly when God throws a few curveballs their way.  Rated PG-13 for "gang violence", which is ridiculous, because this is more family friendly than 90% of the content I've seen on ABC Family and so on.

So there is more of the 100 Coolest Things of 2011... tomorrow, you get another installment as I take you to the Top Ten Coolest Things of 2011... and then, onto the Coolest Things of 2012!

The College Football Preview Post

College football season has now officially started... I meant to blog and post this earlier today, but I got kinda busy, then I meant to post this earlier this evening, then I got dragged to Buy Buy Baby to help with the baby registry and, holy crap, I'm not sure I even understand the purpose of what half the stuff we registered for is.  What the heck is a drop-in when it comes to baby bottles?  I'm sure I'll find out, but not tonight.

Lots of media have already given their picks for the titles, the conference championships, even the Heisman, but they did it weeks ago, which means they couldn't account for the brouhaha in the bar for LSU, or the Tressle Messle, or the Miami Booster Bust... but not me.  I waited until College Football Day One.  So I can be objective.

So, here is the first official Clouds in My Coffee College Football prediction post.  Your winners--bank on 'em--for each of the Division I-A FBS football conferences...

Let's kick off with the minor conferences...

Con-USA... Houston defeats East Carolina in the title game.  Houston has Case Keenum, who has been playing for what seems like 7 years.

Go Troy!  Go Troy!  Go Troy!  Go Troy!

The Sun Belt... Troy Trojans.  Duh.  8-4.

The MAC... The University of Ohio over Toledo.  I think Frank Solich is experienced enough to be huge at Ohio this year.

Mountain West... Tough one, as its the only season where Boise State (who just left the WAC) and TCU (who is going to the Big East in 2012) will play in the same conference.  Even if Boise State loses to Georgia this weekend (which won't happen), the Broncos will more than likely run the table afterwards, win the conference and at least be in the hunt for a BCS at-large berth

The WAC... The loss of both Brigham Young (went indie) and Boise State this season (and Fresno State, which I believe joins the Mountain West, next year) leaves this conference floundering.  It does open the door for someone besides the Broncs to win, though, and I'm guessing Nevada or Fresno, though I'll lean Nevada.

And now, the big boys...

The ACC... Everyone is hyping Florida State like crazy, like Jimbo Fisher has created a monster in the offseason. Personally, I think the whole "Miami & FSU become the ACC tentpoles" expirament has been a fiasco.  However, looking at the ACC as a whole, I can't argue too much with the FSU hype, as there aren't many other teams that are going to be worth much.  Still, I'm picking Virginia Tech over FSU in the ACC title game.

The Big Ten Eleven Twelve Ten... The new blood is Nebraska, giving us the 12 team Big 10, and I think out of all the offseason moves, the best one has been this Husker transition.  With Ohio State a shell (good), this is as good a season as any for Nebraska to dominate--and face it, don't you miss the days when Nebraska, Notre Dame and Penn State were always good enough to hate?  Anyway, I think Wisconsin will roll this season in the conference, and will knock off Nebraska in the Legends vs Leaders title game.

Landry Jones coming back for one more year

The Big XII... XI... X... IX... XII... As far as conferences that won't exist in three years go, Oklahoma is the national darling right now.  But Oklahoma has burned me before... aren't they always supposed to be good, and end up sorta kinda sucking a little when it matters?  But Texas is still solving their problems, teams from Iowa (which should go to the Big 10) or Kansas or Missouri just ain't gonna do it, and neither is Oklahoma State.  I think Texas A&M, in what will likely be their final season before a possible SEC union (cue frowny face) will contend, but due to lack of good competition, I say Oklahoma.

The Big East... If you can explain to me why this is still a BCS conference, and the Mountain West isn't, then you are a better man than I.  Sure, they've got UNLV, New Mexico and Wyoming, but you can't tell me those teams are any worse than The Big East's Syracuse or Rutgers, or Cincinnati in the post Brian Kelly years.  But, in 2012, TCU joins and makes this a much better list.  Oh, I dunno... West Virginia?  Louisville?  Nah.  South Florida, your Big East champs.

The Pac 12... I like this conference, because they went with "Pac" and not "Big", so they can change the numbers as needed.   I feel like this conference mirrors the SEC, only if the best teams are in one division--the North--like the SEC West.  That leaves the title game with only one of the two best teams playing in it, and the other team being the 3rd, maybe 4th best, but yet a division winner just due to how its lined up.  Anyway, Oregon... believe the hype.  Stanford... don't.  Watch the Ducks dominate Arizona State in the Pac 12 championship.

Go Gators!  Go Gators!  Go Gators!  Tim Tebow... come back.

The SEC... Ah, the Southeastern Conference.  How you can even come close to suggesting that there is any conference close to the SEC?  I don't say that as a homer... just a fact.  Heck, the state of Alabama alone has given us two national championships and two Heisman winners in two years.  Georgia is the media love this go round, at least in the East, though South Carolina is getting a lot of love.  However, I'm going Florida.  Why?  South Carolina always falls apart at the end of the year.  Always.  Georgia is... well, Georgia.  Good team, not great.  That doesn't mean Florida will be that great, but they'll be good enough to back into the SEC Championship Game only to get steamrolled by Alabama by about 38 points.  Does Tennessee still have a team?

LSU is going to suffer because of what they've gone through, Arkansas is good, but not great, and Mississippi State is almost good, nowhere near great.  Either way, I'm guessing Alabama will win the SEC, while Auburn gets to a 6-6 record.  Just too many losses in the offseason.

THE HEISMAN... Oh, who the heck knows.  If 364 days ago from today, you said Cam Newton would win the 2010 Heisman, you'd be laughed off the planet.  But, I'll go with the Kool-Aid and say Andrew Luck.

NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP... Another shot in the dark, because again, if you said 364 days ago that Auburn would win the BCS, again you'd be laughed out of town by all by the most diehard of Aubies.  However, it pains me to say it, but I'm picking Alabama over Oregon.  I don't think Oklahoma will have the BCS points to make it--if only because the Big XII is down, and Oklahoma's strength of schedule will take a big hit.

And here's my Top 25 to start the season...
1) Alabama
2) Oregon
3) Oklahoma
4) Boise State
5) Texas A&M
6) LSU
7) Wisconsin
8) Florida State
9) South Carolina
10) Troy
11) Oklahoma State
12) Nebraska
13) Stanford
14) TCU
15) Virginia Tech
16) Georgia
17) Mississippi State
18) Florida
19) West Virginia
20) Arkansas
21) Notre Dame
22) Texas
23) South Florida
24) Michigan State
25) Auburn

Bank on it.  Place your bets

The Summer of Blogging Day Sixty Seven

The 100 Coolest Things of 2010... #50 to 41

And we continue with the longest running list, not counting The Dave100, on this blog site... that being the 100 Coolest Things of 2010.  I won't bother with the recap just yet, you can find it to the right under archives...

50... Harry Finds a Hallow
After what I considered to be a disaster, though one I can still bear to watch, of the last movie (the post I wrote, by the way, "A Letter to Steve Kloves" is one of the most read posts on this here bloggy site), my expectations for "Harry Potter & the Deathly Hallows Part I" were lower... but still slightly high, nonetheless.

Here's what I wrote on November 30th, 2010:

First and foremost, it holds a huge, huge advantage over any of the previous six films, and that is simply that this movie covers only half the book. The reason "Goblet of Fire" and "Order of the Phoenix" cut out almost half of their respective books is simply a time factor... you would have a six hour movie to cover everything ("Goblet of Fire" skipped the S.P.E.W. subplot, and was one of the few things I enjoyed about the movie versions over the books).

Essentially, the film version, at least Part I, of "The Deathly Hallows", is a little like a table of contents. You see a live action snippet of each scene that is fully fleshed out in the book itself, something is allowable because the 140 minutes of the movie covers only about 300 pages, not 500 pages.

You can read the full post here, but it continues to talk about the movie, first spoiler free, and then second, spoiler filled (though there are several alerts to tell you to stop reading if you haven't seen it).  I finished the post by saying, "Anyway, I really enjoyed the film, and have intentions on seeing it again. I said before my favorite movie character is Luna, but my favorite book character is Ginny Weasley... but I'm not sure I dig Bonnie Wright. I also think Fenrir Greybeck is fantastic in the book, but in the movie he's so marginalized and relegated to a second tier character.  Go see the movie, irregardless of whether you've read the book."

49... Via Napoli

Don't let the angle fool you.  This pizza is a monster, and this is taken
after four adults had just about had their fill...

What can I tell you about Epcot's newest restaurant?  Its in Italy, its authentic Italian, and its delicious.  I've eaten there twice, and its got some of the best pizza I've ever had, not to mention some of the best desserts I've eaten in a while.

Their food is a little pricey, but let's face it, its Disney, and all prices are a little higher than normal.  They ph-balance the water to match that of water found in Italy, as well as authenticate other ingredients to give you the freshest, purest form of Italian food... and their large pizza, $40 as it may be, will feed at least six people, if not more.  Its pretty awesome. 

48... Christians Like Stuff
So, Jon Acuff writes this blog, aptly titled Stuff Christians Like about being a Christian, and he asks tough questions like, what to do with the Christian version of "Freebird", or the problem with unrated movies on DVD... he's the author of several books, including one named after his website, and its a great read pretty much every day. 

47... Little Sister Ashley Gets a Ring
What can I say... my own adopted little sister (I got the looks in the family) got a ring on her finger from her hometown sweetheart, Brandon.  Apparently, he'd pined for her for years and years and years, and she gave him the cold shoulder... but one day, she woke up and said, "Whaaaa...?  I... like this guy!  No!  I love this guy!"

At top, its Brandon and Lil
Sister Ashley.  The bottom pic
features The Honorable Rev'rn
Ty "Sharpton" Coffey and Lori
Anne, bride to be.

She stopped by my store and flashed the ring, then I immediately commanded her to go to The Cabana and show The Lovely Steph Leann, which she did. 

And this past May, we were able to attend the wedding, which I'm sure you'll read about in The 100 Coolest Things of 2011... at this rate, some time around September 2013. 

Which leads me to...

46... Ty Gives a Ring
Here's another engagement that rocks, and gets the slight edge over Little Sister Ashley's big moment if only because I was involved in the proceedings...  The Honorable Rev'rn Ty Sharpton called me up and asked if I would participate in his little engagement get-together, which involved me taking the ring from him and setting it up in Samford's chapel. 

It was a little intimidating, holding a ring that cost more than Toni Rocki Honda, my little car at the time.  He asked me to not open it, not to look at it, he wanted Lori Anne to be the next one to see it, and I obliged.  I was to place it on the podium of the chapel at a certain time, then hide when Rev'rn Ty and his bride-to-be, Lori Anne, came in. 

While I was waiting for the word from Ty, people came in and out of the chapel--Samford had a football game going on in the stadium across the street at the same time--and I sat off to the side in a pew, probably looking like an old creeper.  I held the ring box tightly until I got the text that said, "In chapel yard".  I was nervous about letting the ring leave my sight, but I put it on the podium then slipped out a side door.

I walked around the student break area until I finally got a text that said "ITS DONE"... upon my return, there was a big smile from Revr'n Ty, and a bigger smile from little Lori Anne, and the ring almost blinded me.   And I was also able to not just attend, but be a part of their wedding, which you'll probably see in The 100 Coolest Things of 2011 as well.

45... B.o.B. Professes His Love
By the summer of 2010, there weren't a ton of songs that had really piqued my interest, especially in hip-hop areas... cause really, they all kind of sound alike.  So, here comes "Nothin On You" by B.o.B. featuring Bruno Mars, with this profession of love for his boo, telling her that there are chicks all over the place, and that sure, they might be cute or he might say hello... but ain't none them ho's got nothin on you.  Nothing.

"Beautiful girls, all over the world, I could be chasin', but my time would be wasting, they got nothin on you baby (nuh nuh nuh nothin on you... nuh nuh nuh nothing on you)... they might say hi, I might say hey, but you shouldn't worry about what they say cause they got nothing on you, baby (nuh nuh nuh nothing on you... nuh nuh nuh nothing on you)... nothing on you baby..."

Keep in mind, this was the summer that both B.o.B. and Bruno Mars emerged, so I don't feel bad in telling you that for the longest time, I couldn't tell who was rapping and who was singing.  Perhaps I'm still not sure.

44... The Books Get Read
My love of audiobooks is well documented and deep, with probably 100 or more in my collection... I keep most of them, about 110 gbs worth, on an external portable hard drive, but on my iPod that I have with me about 97% of the waking hours of my day, I have at least 30 or 40 that I take with me, just in case I might want to jump into a random book, be it Kristen Chenoweth's biography (or Andre Agassi's) or maybe some Glenn Beck, or even a chick lit novel by Emily Giffen...

And then, I finally joined Audible dot com.  The way it works is, you pay one price per month and you are given "Credits".  Then, you can download audiobooks for a credit, or for larger audiobooks (like the Walt Disney biography I initially got, which was 35 hours--it was two credits, but I got it free for joining).  Every month, for $14.95, I get another credit...

Essentially, its buying an audiobook for $15 per month, but when you consider they are running anywhere from $25 to $50 per book, its a pretty good deal.  Also, for members, you get special discounts on books, sometimes half off, sometimes huge percentages off, sometimes free... I just downloaded "Go the Heck to Sleep" children's book (warning:  NOT Emmy Turnbow safe), narrated by Samuel L. Jackson, for no charge whatsoever...

And the selection is pretty great too.  I managed to get The Pixar Touch for less than $7, I got Patton Oswalt's comedic book for about $6 and downloaded "ESPN: Those Guys Have All the Fun" for May's selection for one single credit... regular price, $26. 

Randomly, just for thought, here's my current wish list, or, books I'll end up downloading or purchasing if they go cheap--in the order I'm going to get them:  "The Men Who Would Be King: An Almost Epic Tale of Moguls, Movies, and a Company Called Dreamworks" by Nicole LaPorte... "Decision Points" by Dubya... "Bossypants" by Tina Fey... "Without You: A Memoir of Love, Loss and the Musical Rent" by Anthony Rapp... "Your Only As Good As Your Next One: 100 Great Films, 100 Good Films and 100 Films For Which I Should Be Shot" by Michael Medavoy

And if you think this was just a reason to go all Ron Burgundy and say, "Hey everyone!  Come look at the cool stuff I've been reading!"... well, you may be right.  Though if anyone has thoughts on any of these books, then I'd love to hear them--besides the predictable recoil by Brad Latta, Atty at Law, at the mention of Glenn Beck or Dubya. 

43... A Dragon Gets Tamed
Here's what I wrote about "How To Train Your Dragon" on June 6th, 2010...

"How to Train Your Dragon" follows the story of Hiccup, who lives in a Viking village where the life of a Viking is to hung and kill dragons of every size--and they are aplenty in this movie. Hiccup is a loser that is made fun of by most of the clan, mostly because his heart is not into hunting anything, much less dragons, but to please his father--who happens to be village chief, no less--he does what he can.

Hiccup ends up taking down a rare Night Fury dragon, but upon finding it in the woods, cannot bring himself to finish him off... and there, the adventure takes flight, pun intended.

I loved it. I loved every single second of this movie. I loved the main character, Hiccup, I loved his love interest, a spry pixie named Astrid, I loved the dragons, including the main one nicknamed Toothless, I loved the setting, I loved the creativity, I loved the story... I thought this movie was brilliant. This was the first time I'd ever seen a non-Pixar animated movie and thought, "This should have been a Pixar film."

The Lovely Steph Leann loved it too. As the credits began to roll, she piped up and said, "Wow. DreamWorks finally got it right." (full review is found here)

By the way, I watched this movie a few days ago on cable... it is just as good, great even, as the first time I watched it.  And that is a true test of a good movie.

42... A Town Gets Covered
Wow this is a big book.  Perhaps Stephen King likes to release a 1000 page behemoth every year, or maybe I just tend to read one--in 2009, it was "It"... and in 2010, it was "Under the Dome".

In the fall of some year after 2012, Dale Barbara, known as "Barbie", is trying to leave the small town of Chester's Mill.  Before he can get very far, however, something odd happens.  An invisible, indestructible barrier--a dome, per se--is dropped over the town, keeping everyone who's out of town out of the town, and everyone who is in the town, in the town.

Big Jim Rennie, second selectman, takes over the town, appointing his corrupt friends and sick, twisted son Junior as town officials, and does his best to try and contain the opposition, which includes Barbie and newspaper editor Julia Shumway.   Slowly but surely, the town's government falls apart as Big Jim's rule becomes more and more stern, and as his ego--and paranoia of losing control--spiral out of control.

Efforts to destroy the Dome fail one after the other, and everything from civility to law to just common sense begins to fall apart, piece by piece, little by little... its not a slippery slope so much as a straight up and down cliff. 

While the Dome is the central key to the novel, it is what happens to the town that becomes the book's plot.  The breakdown in civilization, the loss of respect and democracy... that's the book's central storyline.  When Big Jim realizes that not everyone sees it his way, its then that he begins doing whatever, and I mean whatever, is necessary to ensure his own rule is followed. 

King stated in an interview that he thought of Dubya when he was writing the character of Big Jim, but honestly, all I could think of was He Who Must Not Be Re-Elected... who gives a rip how it affects anyone, this is what I think is best, so this is the way we are doing it. 

Anyway, its a huge book, but I'd rank it up there as one of King's modern classics, and one I'll probably read again in the next year or two (it stays on my iPod just in case...)

41... Z's Serves the Burgers
Sometimes the best food you can find is in a nondescript hole in the wall place you've passed by a thousand times but never noticed its existence... and that would be Chris Z's to a tee. 

Nestled on a corner near St. Vincent's hospital, sharing the same block, if not the same wall, with the empty building that used to be Golden Rule BBQ (take a left off of Red Mt Expressway/Hwy 31 as you are facing St. Vincents), it doesn't have very much parking, and in fact, the best way to get to it is to drive past it, turn left at the light and come around the entire structure.

Walking in, you can see immediately that its family owned and operated... covering the walls in almost every space are frames, frames with single pictures of family, frames with duo photos of more family, large frames with collages of a dozen or more pictures of family and friends.  Being my close friend Melanie's husband, you'll see pictures of Melanie and Chris together.  You'll see the Z kids, Jay Z, Special K and The Zach Attack.  You'll see lots of people that sort of look like their family, and you'll see friends that you might recognize... or not.  

The cafe itself is set with not more than a dozen tables, mostly because there is no room.  Come at lunch time, you'll be hard pressed to find an open chair, but if you are an experienced Chris Z eater, you'll know this and will plan for it--either come earlier or later, or get it to go, or just stand and eat like many patrons do.

The menu is typed out in a familiar Comic Sans font, with some scribble with a marker and some tape over certain things, those manual corrections that the owner doesn't have time to make in the form of a new menu... no, there is too much food to make.  And the food is aplenty.

Hot dogs cooked to perfection, topped with everything or nothing at all, your request.  And the cheeseburgers are fantastic... my personal favorite is a Chris Z burger with mayo, mustard and ketchup, and cheese splashed all over the fries.  The Chris Z burger was actually recently named by a local magazine to the be the best burger in town, and its a well deserved distinction.

And then there is dessert... a family owned recipe for cheesecake pie.  That piece of pie kinda deserves its own ranking among the coolest things of the year, almost like a #40 1/2 spot... its amazing.  I've had cheesecake in six different states, ranging everywhere from the Carnegie Deli in Manhattan to the Baltimore Harbor... and its the best cheesecake I've ever had.

Anyway, if you are in the St. Vincents area, and you find yourself hungry--or even if you just want to find something new, check 'em out.  They also serve breakfast, which is excellent too... and that's not to mention their Middle Eastern menu they have the first Friday of every month.  Its good, good stuff.  (you can click here for more info)

Coming up... Hide yo' kids!  Hide yo' wife!  Its more of the best of 2010, now that 2011 is half over!  Yeah!  More Disney!  A DFC Champion!  And startin' fires...

The Summer of Blogging, Day Twenty Two

June 17th, 1994

(I actually wrote this last year on this date, but didn't finish it... so I had to wait an entire year for this to be relevant again...)

I'm sitting and watching one of the most fascinating documentaries I've ever seen, and its something I didn't think about today until I saw it... "June 17th, 1994" is the name of show, part of ESPN's 30 for 30 series--that's 30 documentaries by 30 filmmakers celebrating the last 30 years of sports stories...

Anyway, this particular show is directed by Brett Miller, and it chronicles one of the most famous (infamous?) days in sports history, Friday, June 17, 1994... here's what happened on that one single day:

Arnold Palmer, one of the legends of golf, one of the pioneers of the game as we know it today (I don't follow golf, yet I know about Arnold Palmer) played his final round of major golf on June 17th, 1994.  Clips show him moving slowly, as he misses a three foot putt near the end of the round (he played on the senior tour until 2005, which he retired from pro golf altogether)

Ken Griffey Jr hit his 30th home run of the 1994 baseball season, a shot over the right field wall off of Kansas City's David Cone, tying the record for most home runs before the end of June set by Babe Ruth.  Griffey had potential to become one of the greatest of all time, before injuries slowed his career.  He retired last season as an almost surefire Hall-of-Famer.  The 1994 season ended in a baseball strike.

The New York Rangers had their Stanley Cup Parade on June 17th, 1994.  They had defeated the Vancouver Canucks (who, incidentally just lost to Boston in the only other finals they were in) in a seven game series to win their first Stanley Cup in their until-then 54 year history.  It remains their only one to date.

The World Cup's opening ceremonies were on June 17th, 1994, at Soldier Field in Chicago, IL.  It was the first, and to this day, only World Cup to be held in America.  Germany beat Bolivia 1-0 in the first game, but Brazil defeated Italy in the finals to become the first country to win four World Cups.

Tied 2-2, the Houston Rockets and New York Knicks had Game Five of their seven game final series on June 17th, 1994, and for anyone who is a fan of the NBA, it was a monumental series.  Patrick Ewing, in his first NBA finals, looking to get the Knicks their first trophy since 1973, while Hakeem Olajuwon was in his prime.  The Rockets won this series 4-3, and would go on to sweep Shaq's Orlando Magic the following season for back-to-back titles.

And... there's OJ Simpson.

On my previous 9/11 posts, I've mentioned that there are certain moments in time, in the world of entertainment, history and the like, that you'll always remember where you were.  I'm too young to remember JFK's assassination, or even Reagan's assassination attempt (the former being 12 years before my time, the latter happening when I was only 4 or 5), two "Where Were You When...?" moments in history, but I remember four major events...

• I was in Mrs. Wikel's class when the Challenger exploded in January 1986 (and I was driving back from my very first day at Starbucks when the Columbia exploded in 2003, though that's not talked about a lot)
• I was at the beach with Darlene Bledsoe, Eddie Hamner and Margaret Dorman when Princess Diana was killed.
• I was working at WBPT, 106.9 The Point, with Rob & Shannon, when we discovered the World Trade Center was on Fire
• And, finally, I was working as a waiter between the summers of my freshman and sophomore year in college at The Wright Place in Samson, AL, set to turn on Game 5 of the NBA finals to play in the background while the diners ate, when CNN Headline News (my news channel of choice being a young Democrat at that time), announced that NFL Hall of Famer, Heisman Trophy Winner and movie personality Orenthal James Simpson was in the back of a white Bronco, being driven by who is thought to be friend and teammate Al Cowlins, and is on the verge of suicide--a warrant had been issued for his arrest that morning for the murders of his wife Nicole Brown Simpson and her friend Ron Goldman. 

In this TMZ influenced, interweb crazy, know-anything-about-anyone-the-instant-it-happens Twitter kind of society that we live in, people who are say, 25 and under, don't get it.  They only know of OJ Simpson by what the interweb and Wiki tells them happened, but back on June 17th, 1994, when there was no interweb accessable, when there was no Facebook and Twitter to immediately let you know things as they occurred, what happened that evening with OJ was... surreal.  Unthinkable.  And like an overturned 18 wheeler burning on the side of the road, you couldn't not watch it, even though you know you had so many other things to do.  Let me tell ya, this was crazy stuff. 

Now, OJ Simpson is a punchline.  Everything from "Yeah, he's searching every golf course in this country for Nicole's killers!" to "I hope he knows how to do that Hertz airport thing in prison" is what you hear when OJ's name is brought up, but back then?  He was beloved.  No kidding.  Its kinda like the difference in Michael Jackson then (biggest pop star in the entire world) and now (freak of nature, not to mention dead). 

For today's culture, it would be like hearing the news that Kobe Bryant had committed rape and... wait, what?  Okay, um... it would be like hearing the news that Tom Brady had committed two homicides... golden boy, talented, loved and adored, and completely shocked that he'd do that.  (Had I written this post two years ago, on June 17th, 2009, "Tiger Woods" would have been the easy choice in that analogy, but now, not so much).  OJ played at USC, then was drafted by the Buffalo Bills, and later played for the San Francisco 49ers.  In addition to becoming the first player to ever run for 2,000 yards in a single season (finished with 2,003 in 1973) he did it in a 14 game season, as opposed to the 16 game season we have now.  OJ is also the only player to rush for over 200 yards in six different games in his career.  Because his nickname was "The Juice", the Bills offensive line was known as "The Electric Company".  They weren't very good, but that's a cool, cool nickname.  And in 1985, he was inducted to the Pro Football Hall of Fame... the same year he married his second wife, Nicole Brown (they divorced in 1992)

He started his entertainment career even before he was done with the NFL, starring in such movies as "The Towering Inferno" and "Capricorn One", and in the miniseries "Roots", he hosted Saturday Night Live once, he was in a memorable and legendary spot for Hertz Rent-a-Car, and of course, he was the one and only Nordberg in all three The Naked Gun films.   Bottom line is, this guy was awesome.  OJ was the man.

And then, June 17th, 1994 happened. 

A few days before Nicole Brown and her friend Ron Goldman were found guilty outside of Brown's condo, apparently stabbed to death.  Police suspected OJ Simpson, and gave him until 11am, Friday, June 17th, to turn himself in.  By 2pm, the police had issued at APB for OJ, and at 5pm, Robert Kardashian...

(remember the days when Kardashian was somewhat of a respectable name?  At least it meant "lawyer".  And yes, he is the biological father of Khloe, Kim and Kourtney, with ex-wife Kris Jenner.  Where was I?)

Oh yeah.. Kardashian read a rambling letter issue by OJ, which sounded like a suicide note to many people.  At 645pm, police spotted OJ's white Ford Bronco traveling down I-405, but when they tried to pull it over, the driver--Al Cowlings--yelled that OJ had a gun to his own head.   They backed off, but continue to follow at around 35 miles per hour.  And so began this slow chase across Southern California, one that was picked up by just about every network, and cut in on all programming.   So here I am, 18, going on 19, waiting tables at a small, podunk restaurant, and every eye in the cafe are glued to the television.

The white Bronco continues, and people began gathering along the side streets and bridges, waving, cheering and holding up signs.  There were phone calls made from the SUV claiming there were guns, claiming there were death threats, and OJ yelling that he didn't do it.  The Bronco stopped in front of his Brentwood, CA, home where we watched it sit there for 45 minutes, we watched OJ go inside for an hour (and apparently spoke to his mother and actually drank a glass of orange juice), then come out and surrender to police.  Inside the Bronco, the police recovered $8,000 cash, some clothes, a passport, some pictures.... and a loaded .357 magnum and a fake moustache and gotee.   Thus ended a news story and low-speed chase that was watched by NINETY FIVE MILLION PEOPLE.  That's almost the amount of people who came to the first DeuceFest!

If you don't remember the results, the trial captivated the country a few years later, mostly because it was a ridiculous circus type event that Judge Lance Ito lost control over within the first few days.  And then on October 3rd, around 10am, the verdict came... I remember this day vividly too, because I was hanging out in the BCM when Joey Hinson, who lived in the apartment downstairs with Tad Roose, came out and yelled to no one in particular, "Hey!  The OJ verdict is about to be announced!" 

Several of us ran downstairs to hear the verdict, and all of us groaned.  Not guilty.  He got away with it.  I won't go into it here, but there is a mountain of evidence that was never even presented in the trial for one reason or another (like the contents of the Bronco), plus a whole lot of goofs by both sides.  Some years later, he was sued by the Goldman family, and a verdict of guilty was returned, with a penalty of $33,500,000 against OJ, but California law prevents pensions, like the his from the NFL, to be used in judgements, so all the Goldmans got was about $500K from the sale of OJ's estate and belongings.

When doing the cover art, The Goldman Family
had the "IF" reduced, so "I DID IT" would be
the only words you'd see clearly

After a 2000 Rolling Stone article was released revealing how much money OJ was making from signing autographs, he moved from California to Florida--where the law prevents an estate from being taken to collect a debt... OJ gets away again.

He skirted another judgement in January 2007 when a restraining order was dismissed, one that would have prevented him from spending any advance money from a cancelled book deal... one that had its rights auctioned off later that year, and was then awarded to the Goldman Family... the book was called "If I Did It: Confessions of the Killer". 

After all the skirting and escaping he had done legally, you'd think OJ would buy a house on the beach somewhere and settle down, maybe just be quiet.  But OJ strikes again--in September of 2007, a group of men led by OJ stormed into a Vegas hotel room and robbed the occupants at gunpoint.  He was arrested, and after all the other defendants turned on OJ and confessed against him for reduced sentences, OJ was convicted in September of 2008.

And in a huge "MY BAD, DAWG... HERE'S THE MAKE UP" from the United States Justice System, OJ Simpson was sentenced to 33 years in prison, with the possibility of parole in 9 years (2015).  He's in the Locklove Correctional Center in Nevada... inmate #1027820.

And thus ends the long, strange saga of OJ Simpson.  I'm afraid that nowadays, there are people out there who probably think he was railroaded, and completely innocent, not because of their beliefs in the evidence and trial, but because... well, so much time has gone by, its becoming a faded memory.

But not for me.  I'll remember June 17th, 1994. 

The Summer of Blogging, Day Seventeen

The 100 Coolest Things of 2010... #100 - 91

If you are reading this on Facebook, you may want to just click over to Clouds In My Coffee, since this post has a ton of videos and photos you might not see on FB...

It took a while to get going, but I knew I'd get there eventually... this blog started in 2005, and at the end of the year, I did The 100 Coolest Things of 2005, all in one single post.  Right after 2006 ended, I broke up the list into ten installments, then the next year, did 2007's list, onto 2008's list, then 2009's list, and now here we are, the sixth time I've looked upon the previous year and gave you what I believe to be my favorite things of 2010.

What means "cool", asks you?  Just simply, its cool.  Its fun.  Be it a song, a movie, a TV show... something I really liked.  Maybe its a place to eat, one that I visited over and over during the year.  And sometimes its a person or a couple or a group... someone who had an impact, someone that I just adore or cherish or love dearly.  And its things that I discovered in 2010... thusly, as much as we love Steven and Calah Ray, they won't make this list, because they were in the Top Ten Coolest Things of 2009... and though they continue to be cool, they make way for new things, people and stuff.  There is even a few books and movies that came out prior to 2010, but I discovered them (or in one case, "re"discovered them) and thusly, here they are.

Well, let's get going, shall we?   Without further ado, here are the 100 Coolest Things of 2010

100... Alabama Wins the National Title
Okay, okay... yes I rib the Tide Nation, because yes, they've won multiple titles, and whether they can legitimately claim 13 national titles (which I think is a stretch) or they actually won their 7th or 8th title (more likely, methinks), the fact remains, that in this modern day and age, winning a national title in college football is a huge, huge thing. 



And they did it by beating none other than the college powerhouse known as The University of Texas by a closer-than-the-score-indicates score of 37-21.  Their star QB, Colt McCoy, went down early... but I think they would have prevailed anyway.  Because the difference in a team like Texas, and Alabama, at least in the 2009 season, is that Texas has a star player--McCoy.  Alabama had Ingram... and Jones... and McElroy... and a host of others that, even in the loss of one, would keep the team going.   And lest we forget, the game was really, really good. 

99... Queen Latifah Gets Her Man
I'll be honest... like The Lovely Steph Leann, I like the movies I like.  That means simply, sometimes a stupid movie is something I find hilarious (see "Employee of the Month" or "Deuce Bigalo: Male Gigolo") and supposedly incredible films are snooze-inducing or terrible (see "The English Patient"... or better yet, don't).  And sometimes a lame movie is where I find the most enjoyment.

And that brings us to "Just Wright", starring Queen Latifah and rapper Common.  This was ridiculed in the press, its got a less than 50% rating on Rotten Tomatoes and let's face it, the movie was badly acted and poorly written.  And yet, I found myself enjoying the heck out of it. 

Here's part of what I wrote on June 10th, 2010:

Anyway, the final reason I liked this film is simply... its clean. Very, very little language (a few "damns" and I think one "bull****"), no violence at all, other than aggressive play on the basketball court, and as far as sexual situations, there's one single scene where you know Leslie and Scott did the deed, but its the next morning and they are lying in bed looking at each other, completely covered by sheets. I can deem this movie completely Emmy Turnbow Safe. Its a good first date movie.

By no means spend $20 on this film, unless you are in fact on a date. At best, catch a matinee, wait for the $1 theater, or get the DVD or watch it online this summer when it will probably come out. For now, The Lovely Steph Leann will be stocking up on Common CDs.

98... The Miz Claims the Title
Hey, I'm a wrasslin' fan, and I admit it.  I ain't scurred. 

And one of my favorites is The Miz.  If you can believe it, his real name is Michael Mizanin, and he was a cast member of MTV's The Real World: New York in 2001, and then the subsequent Real World/Road Rules Challenge. 

What's also interesting is watching the evolution of The Miz in the WWE... he started more of a joke, and looking like it was possible he'd never be more than a jobber or a C-lister.  But over the last year, in large part due to a huge push, but also due to his committment and ability, The Miz has hit the big time, and is one of the headliners now. 

And this year, he won the WWE Championship by cashing in his Money in the Bank Briefcase, beating a worn down and exhausted Randy Orton, right after Randy Orton has successfully defended the title against Wade Barrett of The Nexus, and after he won, he yelled out of one of my favorite catchphrases...

"I'M THE MIZ.... AAANNNDDD IIIIII'M AWESOOOOOMMMEEEE!!!!""

Hey, I'm a wrasslin' fan, and I admit it.  I ain't scurred.

97... Lotso Huggin' Bear Comes Home
The Lovely Steph Leann went out of town on business, which took her to the coast and ended up with her at a Disney Store.  And she came back with a random surprise.

How awesome is this?

96...  SMU Pays Their Players
To celebrate 30 years, ESPN has been showcasing what they call "30 for 30"... that would be 30 documentaries, each made by a different noted director, each with their own creative control, and each telling a sports story that sometimes is famous--and sometimes is not. 

To me, the "30 for 30" has been amazing over the last year, be it the controversial games from The U of Miami in the 80s or the "where were you when" aura of OJ's White Bronco... but in my mind, the best was saved for last.  "Pony Exce$$" tells the fabled story of Southern Methodist University Mustangs football which, back in the early 80s, was a national powerhouse, including posting a 45-5-1 record from 1980 to 84.

Hall of Famer Eric Dickerson and Craig James joined Charles Waggoner to form "The Pony Express", leading SMU to a share of the national title in 1981.  All was not on the up-n-up, however, in Mustang land, as it was revealed in 1986 that for a few years previous, players were being paid from an under the table slush fund, allegations that were put on SMU after they were already on probation.



The NCAA had the power to use "the death penalty", which means barring a school from fielding a football team for a determined amount of time.  They had never used it... until they used it on Southern Methodist.  It devastated the school and the community, and SMU essentially never recovered.  In fact, it took over 20 years for the school to reach a bowl game again--a win over Nevada in The Hawai'i Bowl--and it only had a single winning season in that span up until their bowl season.

Another fallout from the decision is the thought that the NCAA will likely never use "the death penalty" again on a school because of the catastrophic effects of the decision.

All of this can be learned in "Pony Exce$$", a fascinating documentary completely worth the two hours it takes to watch it.  Look it up, DVR it, and enjoy the step back into college football history.

95... Big Al Makes An Appearance
So The Lovely Steph Leann and I are at The Magic Kingdom late last year, and are enjoying the Magic Hours, that is, late night in the park.  We are walking past Liberty Square into Frontierland, and headed to Pirates over in Adventureland, so we take that little cut through to get back there, and also to use the restroom.

We go in our respective bathrooms, and being a boy, I naturally finish first--amazing how much time can be saved by standing.  Anyway, I got out first, and who did I immediately spot standing by a tree?   Big Al.

No, Roll Tiders, not that elephant from Tuscaloosa.  Its actually none other than my favorite Country Bear from the Jamboree of the same name.  And in all the trips I've ever been to Disney World, I've never, ever seen Big Al.  And in all the trips The Lovely Steph Leann has been to Disney World, which is about a half-dozen more than me, she has never seen Big Al. 

I race over and say, "Hey Big Al!"  He turns around, waves and gives me a hug.  I text The Lovely Steph Leann and say "GET OUT HERE".  I try and stall, and ask the friendly Cast Member if she will take my picture with Big Al.  Of course she agrees, so I get my picture taken.  Finally, I spot The Lovely Steph Leann emerging from The Lovely Ladies Room, and she's looking around for me.  I call out, "The Lovely Steph Leann!  Over here!"  She turns and sees me, does a "there you are" wave with her hands, and starts ambling over. 

"Hurry!" I yell at her, and she looks confused... and then she sees Big Al.  Her face brightens, she says, "Oh!  It's Big Al!"  She races over, and we both get our picture with Big Al.  He waves, we smile, the camera snaps and Big Al is on his way. 

And it left me with a memory that was one of the coolest things of the year.

94... Hurricane Rhett Falls in Love
I gotta be careful where I tread... "The Other Guys" is a funny movie.  It's not in my Top Ten of the Year, nor is it the funniest movie I saw in 2010.  Its not nearly the best movie I saw, nor is it a movie that I own.  But according to Hurricane Rhett, it doesn't get much funnier than Will Ferrell and Mark Wahlberg teaming up as mismatched cops (I know, new concept, right?!) trying to catch some bad guys.

Really, the plot is not all that important... what is important is that this movie has a literally a murder's row of people I love to see in a movie... The Rock, who I have a man crush on... Samuel L. Jackson... Michael Keaton... Rob Riggle... and an incredibly priceless cameo by Derek Jeter.

This was also the film that helped me figure out what it is about Will Ferrell that everyone enjoys... he makes everyone better.  He makes everyone funnier than he is.  I think back to "Anchorman", and though Ron Burghandy is funny, Brick Tamblin, Champ Kind and Brian Fantana are funnier, feeding off of Ferrell.  In "Old School", Frank the Tank is funny, but Bernard and the Frat guys are funnier.  And taking "Talladega Nights", yes, Ricky Bobby is great.  But Reese Bobby is better, Jean Girard is snarkier and Cal Naughton?  Cal is priceless.  Oh, and Assistant Susan is smokin' hot.  Just sayin.

And in "The Other Guys", Det. Allan Gamble is funny.  But feeding off of Ferrell, Det. Hoitz (Wahlberg) is funnier, as are Danson and Highsmith and Rob Riggle's Det. Martin is absolutely hysterical, as is Damon Wayans Jr's Det. Fosse...

What was my point again?  Well, whatever.  Anyway, The Lovely Steph Leann and I saw this movie with Hurrican Rhett and his wife Amarylis By Morning (up from san antone), and THAT is the best way to see a movie... with friends that like and laugh at the same kind of movie you do.  We probably would have enjoyed it well enough, but perhaps not as much as we did with the Barnetts in tow. 

So the 94th coolest thing of 2010 is not "The Other Guys", its watching "The Other Guys" with good friends.

93... Jamie Makes a Post
"Happy Harper Stories" is a blog that I check out about once a week or so, written by a young lady who goes to Valleydale Baptist Church (an sbc fellowship, natch), and its a fun little blog about the Christ-Following life, a Christian family and so on.   But one day, she decided to write a little blog called "Biblical Submission and Worship in the Bedroom", and it was excellent. 

I've shared this on the blog already, and linked to her blog while I posted by own on a very similar subject, which you can read it--"Sex Love God and Gifts"--by clicking here and can also read the first paragraph of her post. 

Just wanted to mention it again before it gets lost in her blog and in mine, like so many excellent posts do in blogs that are updated a few times a week. 

92... Amy Adams (whom I'm in love with) Goes to Ireland
To clear up a misconception, just because a movie has Amy Adams, whom I'm in love with, in it does not make it a good movie.  Sometimes she can be in crap, just like anyone else.  I watched a movie called "The Last Run" starring Fred Savage, aka Kevin Arnold, and though it said "Amy Adams, whom I'm in love with" as one of the main credits, she was only featured minimally.  And, not that this has anything to do with her screen time or lack thereof, the movie was one of the worst films I've ever seen in my entire life.  I mean, bad.  Like, bad bad.  Not so bad its good, but so bad its bad bad.

To be real honest, "Psycho Beach Party" and "Cruel Intentions 2" weren't much better, and perhaps it was "Junebug" that gave her the chance to make better movie choices... either way, like any Hollywood star, even amongst tons of success, there are those "paycheck movies" (see, Cage, Nicolas, post-Leaving Las Vegas), and the movie at #92, "Leap Year", is probably in that catagory for Amy Adams, whom I'm in love with.

"Leap Year" simply tells the story of Anna Brady, a socialite who is itching to be hitching to her boyfriend Jeremy... when he has a "surprise for her", and it turns out to be something like earrings and not a ring-ring, Anna is sad.  When Jeremy goes to Ireland, Anna decides that she is going to find him, partaking of an old Irish tradition that states on a Leap Year day, February 29th, a woman may propose to a man.

But on her way to Dublin, she gets derailed in the Irish countryside by bad weather, she meets a guy she can't stand that agrees to take her to Dublin and... well, let's be honest, we aren't watching "Schindler's List" here, we all know where this is going... okay, to be fair, we knew where "Schindler's List" was going to, but thats not my point.  My point is, this isn't a movie you over-analyze.  I could tell you that Anna ends up dumping Jeremy for the Irish guy at the end, and I would not be spoiling this film for you, because you know this the moment the new guy takes the stage.

I must say, though, another star of this film besides Amy Adams, whom I'm in love with, and Matthew Goode is probably none other than the Irish Countryside.  The views are spectacular, the scenery is marvelous and the cameras always make sure you see a field blowing in the wind, or the cliffs with the water crashing against them, or so on and so forth.

Its a fun movie that you don't have to think about... you just let yourself have a good time with it, and if you are like me, just stare at Amy Adams when she's onscreen.  Cause she's beautiful.  And I'm in love with her.  

91... RDJ Wears the Suit (again)
There have been been few turnarounds in Hollywood that have been as huge, as monumental and as successful at the career of Robert Downey Junior.  He's gone from prison, drug use and a life spiraling into an overdose that was directing him onto a list with Heath Ledger or Brittany Murphy in the gone-too-soon department... into one amazing actor who is finally making some good choices.  Okay, okay, "The Soloist" notwithstanding... there's "Sherlock Holmes", there's "Due Date", there's "Tropic Thunder"... and of course, there's Iron Man.

And in 2010, there was Iron Man 2.  And I thought it was just splendid, if I do say so myself.   Here's what I wrote about it in June after seeing it:

...I was thrilled. The opening sequence, the introduction to The Stark Expo, Whiplash [Mickey Rourke] shows up and lashing his whips, bad accent and hair and all, Sam Rockwell being awesome like he always is, Iron Man fighting, and don't think I didn't notice the similarities between Stark's dad's plans for a futuristic community and Disney's old Epcot plan... in fact, there's a song over the ending credits called "Tomorrow Today", and it was written by the famed Sherman Brothers, the same guys who wrote "There's a Great Big Beautiful Tomorrow" for the Carousel of Progress at Walt Disney World, amongest other great Disney classics.


Speaking of the ending credits, stay til the very end. Its worth it.

And there is our first ten...

Coming up... Bosses go undercover... Helen Mirren gets violent... and later, my night eating Lebenese...

Next:  The 90th to 81st Coolest Things of 2010